You're Not Alone: The Journey from Abduction to Empowerment

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“I only go on media if I believe there’s a good purpose for it.I didn’t go on any media when I first came home, and when Ifinally decided to, I didn’t go on alone. If you don’t feel likeyou’re ready for it, you don’t have to. You can just say no. It’s notlike it’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. The media will still bethere if you decide later you want to talk about your abduction.If you do decide to talk, let the media know where you stand,and don’t let them walk all over you. You still have rights as ahuman being. You have the right to tell them what you are orare not willing to talk about. ” — ElizabethDEALING WITH THE MEDIAIn many instances the media play a big role in bringing children home. They can get the wordout about an abduction, who might be responsible, what kind of car was used, and where theabductor may be heading. They can help the police notify the public about your abduction andcan help issue an AMBER Alert. The problem is that sometimes the media attention does notgo away once you are recovered. The media will want people to see that you are okay, and tofind out exactly what happened to you while you were gone. People may feel like they haveinvested something personally in your life. And they may have—they probably thought aboutyou, worried about you, prayed for you, ormaybe even joined the search for you.As true as that might be, you do not have aresponsibility to them. Your responsibilityis to help yourself heal and to do what isbest for you.“I started writing down answersto questions after talking withmy dad. I wrote down thingsI should say if I didn’t quiteknow what I was feeling. Ididn’t want to hurt people’sfeelings, but felt that I did inthe process. This helped medeal with their questions andfeel better about me as well. ”— Lindsey34
You can choose whether ornot you want to tell your storyor how much of your storyyou want to tell. You canchoose when, where, how, andto whom it is told.Do not feel obligated to talk to themedia. Have your parents or people youtrust help you make decisions aboutinteracting with them. If you feel there isa good reason to talk, then tell the mediawhat you want to say. If you don’t, then say no.“The truth can easily getmisconstrued, especially in themedia. Always remember thatit is your story, it is your life,and you can pick and choosewhat you want to do withanything. It’s ok to say no. ”— TamaraYou can also write down automatic responses to questions that you receive repeatedly, orthose you think people will ask you. This will help you sort through your thoughts, expressyour feelings and emotions, and become more comfortable when questions come out ofthe blue.If your story did not receive media attention, it does not mean that what happened to you isany less traumatic than what happened to anyone else. You can be grateful for the opportunityto heal in private. Take advantage of the quiet space in which to make your choices aboutyour future.>> Your automatic responses to questions:35
Page 1: U.S. Department of JusticeOffice of
Page 4 and 5: U.S. Department of JusticeOffice of
Page 6 and 7: LETTER FROM THE AUTHORSLike you, we
Page 10 and 11: You may feel that you need some spa
Page 12: Remember, you cannot do this alone.
Page 15 and 16: high school. I played sports, was a
Page 17 and 18: “The day after I was rescued, I h
Page 19 and 20: in pieces when I came home. But thr
Page 21: Remember:>> Seek out the people you
Page 24 and 25: SAM’S STORYMy story is not your a
Page 26 and 27: I eventually realized that was okay
Page 28 and 29: SECTION 3: GETTING IN THE DRIVER’
Page 30 and 31: YOUR RIGHTSRemember that you have r
Page 32 and 33: ELIZABETH’S STORYBelieve it or no
Page 34 and 35: REACHING OUTWhen I needed someone,
Page 36 and 37: SECTION 4: NAVIGATING THE ROADBLOCK
Page 40 and 41: POLICE INVESTIGATIONSOne thing that
Page 42 and 43: VICTIM IMPACT STATEMENTAt the sente
Page 44 and 45: MAGGIE’S STORYMy name is Maggie a
Page 46 and 47: come to depend on. And believe it o
Page 48 and 49: FINDING YOUR STRENGTHIt is not easy
Page 50 and 51: SECTION 5: THE NEW NORMALWhat you h
Page 52 and 53: RETURNING TO SCHOOLReturning to sch
Page 54 and 55: CELEBRITY STATUSBe prepared to live
Page 56 and 57: ALICIA’S STORYWelcome home! You a
Page 58 and 59: IT’S NOT YOUR FAULTIt took me a w
Page 60 and 61: want to know whom I am talking to a
Page 62 and 63: A LETTER TOPARENTSDear Parents,As s
Page 64 and 65: WHERE TO FINDMORE HELPEveryone who
Page 66 and 67: Through the Office for Victims of C
Page 68: YOUR STORY64

You're Not Alone: The Journey from Abduction to Empowerment

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