‘Just Say Goodbye’ (January 2013 online edition)

DVRCV Discussion Paper No. 8Providing for children after separationIn all six filicide-suicide cases, the women’s role as mother was central to theirlives. Unlike most of the fathers in the previous chapter, the women in thesecases, with the exception of one, were the primary carers for their children.Research shows that this is a common pattern. A large-scale national study ofparents who had separated undertaken by the Australian Institute of FamilyStudies found that approximately 80 per cent of children spent most nights inthe care of their mothers, with one-third spending all nights with her (Westonet al. 2011).In their study of filicides in Victoria, Alder and Polk (2001) found that inall the filicide-suicide cases involving mothers, ‘the mother’s understandingsand feelings regarding her relationships with her children and the nature ofher responsibilities for them play a significant part in the unfolding of events’(2001:47). They also found that women’s concerns about their children’swellbeing formed part of their own unhappiness (Alder & Polk 2001).In several of the cases studied by Kirkwood (2001), women expressed concernabout how they would provide for their children after separation from theirpartner. This theme is evident in the following case.‘Cathy’Cathy (33 years) was the mother of three children under the age of 12 years. 108 Cathystrangled and killed one of her children. She intended to kill the other two children butone alerted neighbours, who called the police. Cathy proceeded to cut her own wrists, inan attempt to kill herself. When an ambulance arrived she resisted medical treatment,stating that she wanted to die. She survived. Cathy was found not guilty by reason ofinsanity and detained in a psychiatric institution at her Majesty’s pleasure.Cathy’s marriage to the children’s father, ‘Derek’, had ended three years earlier.Cathy told psychiatrists who assessed her after the filicide that Derek had beenviolent towards her during their marriage and that she left because he threatenedto kill her. 109 She also said that Derek had little contact with the children beforetheir deaths and was substantially behind in child support payments.Derek, in a police statement, said that at one stage after separation, whenCathy was having difficulty coping with the three children, he was contacted bygovernment personnel and asked if he would assume custody of the children,the alternative being they would become wards of the state. He declined. In108 The information about ‘Cathy’ is drawn from Coronial records as part of the research undertaken byKirkwood 2000.109 Cathy also told police that Derek had been violent during their relationship and that he had also been violenttowards the children.66