‘Just Say Goodbye’ (January 2013 online edition)

DVRCV Discussion Paper No. 8very much and just couldn’t bear the two of us being apart’. Martin’s statementprovides an interesting insight into Samantha’s actions. He indicates theseparation contributed to her decision to suicide and she killed the childrenas well because she could not conceive of them being without her. There is noindication he believed Samantha killed the children in order to make him suffer.Samantha, like Cathy, did not think anyone else could care for the children theway she did. Both women believed death was the best option for them all.‘Altruistic’ filicideThe cases of Cathy and Samantha, above, appear to be consistent with thecategory of ‘altruistic’ filicide, outlined in Chapter 3. ‘Altruistic’ filicide is usedin the literature to describe cases in which parents, predominantly mothers,believe they are saving their children from real or imagined suffering by killingthem. The women’s belief is seen to be irrational. For this reason, the women’sactions are often described as ‘delusional’ or ‘misguided’ and linked with mentalillness (Alder & Polk 2001).The term ‘altruistic’ is problematic given that the children are killed; however,it captures a key difference between these types of filicides and ‘retaliation’filicides. In discussions with others before the killings, and in suicide notes, thewomen in these cases focused their concerns on their children’s welfare and onthe negative impact their own suicide would have on them.The filicide literature indicates that, although rare, it is also possible for fathersto perpetrate ‘altruistic’ filicides. It appears that such cases are often familicidesin which some fathers kill their intimate partner and their children because theydo not want them to suffer the consequences of their own suicide (Websdale2010). These sorts of cases may be more likely to occur while the relationship isintact rather than in the context of separation.Violence and abuse by ex-partnersAs outlined in Chapter 3, research shows that many fathers who kill childrenhave previously been violent towards their intimate partner. This is not thecase for women who kill their children. In contrast, research shows that oftenwomen who kill their children have been victims of violence from their malepartners (Oberman & Meyer 2008).There was indication of violence from women’s partners or ex-partners infour of the six filicide-suicide cases studied by Kirkwood (including the cases ofCathy and Samantha discussed above). 113 In a further case, a mother believed113 As discussed earlier, the presence of family violence is not always evident from police and coronial records.70