The Scars of the Erasure_web

Erasure_4a 10.1.11 20:29 Page 193I MISSED SLOVENIA, I WAS BORN THERE193time the head of the Flying Academy and now the consultant to the President of theParliament of Montenegro) and warranted that I’d not return to Slovenia, I managedto obtain the diploma. So I became officially a helicopter pilot in time, I obtained thediploma. Immediately after that I was appointed as lecturer-instructor at the academyin Podgorica, since in 1993, the training for plane and helicopter pilots was moved toPodgorica.But I secretly hoped that soon after completing the academy I’d return to Slovenia.I missed Slovenia, I was born there. It’s also what I wanted to do when I became a lecturer-instructorin Podgorica. I persuaded my retired father, 2 who after thirty years oflife in Slovenia wanted to return to Montenegro, not to sell the apartment in Slovenia,because I intended to return as soon as possible. Only when all the possibilities for myreturning to Ribnica evaporated – among other things, I had a lot of problems with documents,since I didn’t have an ID card or passport until September 1995 – my fathereventually sold the apartment and moved to Montenegro in 1998. If there had existedthe slightest possibility of my returning, my father would never have sold that apartment.There was another reason, too, why I wished to return to Slovenia. I had a girlfriend ofmany years in Ribnica, and I wanted to marry her. She visited me several times in Montenegro,but our relationship died out in 1995 because we couldn’t marry and live together.I wanted to return to Slovenia by all means, so I didn’t want her to come toMontenegro and live here with me. After the erasure I first went to Slovenia in late December1995, on a time-limited visa, which I obtained based on an invitation letterfrom my parents.Since then, I’ve visited Slovenia around fifteen times. On five occasions or so Ihad problems with obtaining an entry visa, and once the Slovenian embassy rejectedmy visa application; that was when I wanted to attend the twentieth anniversary ofgraduation, to which I was twice invited in writing by my schoolmates from elementaryschool. My other trips were facilitated, thanks to the Schengen visa, which I obtainedwhen I switched to civil aviation in 2007. At the moment, I work for the private companyVektra Aviation as an AW-139 helicopter pilot.I enjoy going to Slovenia, it’s my country and I feel at home there, although myparents have moved. In 2002 I obtained a balloon pilot’s license in Slovenia from theAdministration for Civil Aviation of the RS, and bought my first balloon for four personsfrom the Association for Free Flying in Kostanjevica na Krki. Balloon flying is my hobby,and I now endeavor to promote this sport in Montenegro. I was the main organizer ofthe third international balloon festival, with most participants coming from Slovenia.I got married in 1998, but my marriage didn’t last long; it ended in 2004. I havea son, he is nine.Seven years ago I went to the administrative unit in Ribnica to ask about my statusand the possibility of regaining it. But this inquiry was not a pleasant experience, I2 The father is retired for disability, since he suffered from a psychological disorder in June 1991, during the war inSlovenia and spent two months in a psychiatric hospital. He is still under medical treatment preventing his conditionfrom deteriorating. He is psychologically very weak, and the most likely reason for his condition is stress caused bythe circumstances at that time and the fact that his son was not there with them when this was happening.