BeatRoute Magazine B.C. print e-edition - March 2016

IF I HAD 15 MILLION DOLLARS
a vague offering from the BC government
Last month the BC government pledged 15
million dollars to grow Vancouver’s music
industry into “the Nashville of Canada.” I was
at the press conference and while it was not unlike
many press conferences, it was still very weird.
It began as it often does with people making
sure their name was on the guestlist (though I
don’t think the $7 dollar cover was life shattering if
it wasn’t). Atop the stairs in their finest “look professional
attire” (black shirt, buttons, less ripped
jeans) was easily the largest, soberest congregation
of “music industry professionals” I’ve ever seen.
Few were sure what was up, though whispers of
“it’s money” floated through the room, presumably
because we all got the invite describing the event
as Music Canada’s launch of the BC Industry report.
Music Canada basically commissions research
about the music industry in Canada; check out
their report comparing Toronto to Austin for a
good time! I was looking forward to a discussion
about the report’s findings and recommendations,
because facts and objectivity are like unicorns in
the idealist wastelands of the Vancouver music biz.
However, the plot changed when it was announced
that Premier Christy Clarke was going to speak.
If you’ve never seen the Warehouse Studio 2
live room, it’s deliciously large. Yet, the bulk of
attendees were corralled for the announcement
within three meters of the back wall, separated
from the podium side seats by a breaker of
tripods and reporters. Within this sacred space
were the VIPs, which included seats for Chad
Krueger and Matthew Good (his old guitar player
was with the mob). At the front stood Michael
Buble, the head of the BC Chamber of Commerce,
the new guy at Music BC, the Premier,
and the Music Canada dude. Praise was delivered
unto an absent Brian Adams for opening segregated
meters of space to us all.
First to speak was Music Canada, referencing
the challenges and opportunities listed in the
report. I encourage you all to read it in a brightly lit
space with a magnifying glass, because the printed
version uses a barely visible sans serif font. He went
on to introduce Michael Buble, who’s job it was to
introduce the Premier. Why? WHY!?!
Atop emerald green platform shoes, the
Premier praised music as a source of personal
developmental strength, derived from DOA
shows and Vancouver’s now defunct Richard’s
on Richard’s. Eventually she made it to the magic
words, “15 million dollars.” The VIPs instantly
rose to their feet in applause. She went on to pay
lip service to “challenges,” “young artists,” and
“housing costs.” When she finished I would have
given anyone in that room $100 to tell me what
the province was actually going to do with the
money. And I wasn’t alone.
The first question from the crowd was along the
lines of “You’re saying this money will help young
and struggling artists who are being pushed out of
Vancouver by housing costs. How?” The Premiere
said something about education; Buble interjected,
not understanding the question, though in
You get a fur! You get a fur! You get a jet! You get a jet! You get a….
by Art Price
his defense I can see how cost of living challenges
didn’t compute. The press got into the eye-rollingly
pointless issues and won hearts and minds with
questions about MSP premiums and Alberta’s
economic woes. Luckily for all of our sanity, Dan
Mangan managed to sneak in one last question. To
paraphrase, “Hey, 15 million is great, but what are
you going to do with it?” With the Buble smokescreen
already deployed, the Premier again referenced
funds, education, and finally FINALLY that
the BC Music Report’s recommendations would be
used as the road map to how to use the funds.
It was then time to flee; I paused only for a
moment to notice the album mastering session’s
worth of cheese and snacks that had been set up
for mingling. My soul craved a rainy walk back
towards Main Street to reset the Lotus Land
reality meter.
photo: ???
24 MARCH 2016 •
city