Life Begins R-E-S-P-E-C-T … is it too much to ask? By Kate McLelland “All I’m askin’ for is a little respect.” The words of Aretha Franklin’s song, first released in 1967, may be about a cheating boyfriend, but so powerful is the emotion behind the music that these days it has become something of an anthem for individuals and groups who feel disrespected by society. If you were young at the time when Aretha’s single reached No. 1 in the charts, and are now in your sixties or seventies, you may find yourself wondering where the respect for old age has gone. Once upon a time, according to Pulitzer-prize winning author Jared Diamond, respecting your elders and betters was a matter of survival. During his life-long study of traditional societies and their attitudes towards older people, Diamond – an award-winning professor from ULCA in America – has observed that elders who are no longer able to contribute fully to community life still command respect because of their ability to recall information that is important to the tribe. “Older people in traditional societies have a huge significance that would never occur to us in our modern, literate societies,” Diamond has claimed. “In traditional societies without writing, older people are the repositories of information. It’s their knowledge that spells the difference between survival and death for their whole society.” That information might include anything from advice on how to survive an earthquake, find water in a drought or cure an unusual medical condition. Since the prehistoric times this remembered knowledge has been crucial to human progress, so perhaps it’s no wonder that the elders who were the gatekeepers of such wisdom were granted high status and respect. Nowadays – in an age of information overload – it seems that older voices are neither heeded nor needed. Sadly, at a time when healthcare advances are helping people to live longer and the world has more wise and experienced senior citizens than ever before, older people are having to fight for the respect they believe is their due. Highly industrialised Western societies are often identified as the worst offenders when it comes to disrespecting old age, but many of the world’s cultures continue to revere and respect their older citizens. In China an “Elderly Rights Law” dictates the way older people should be treated, while in East Asia respect for the elderly, fathers and ancestors is deeply rooted in society. In African and Mediterranean countries family culture has also remained strong, but in other parts of the world there are signs of change. Harish Mamgain, who runs a charity in New Delhi, says: “We should love (our elders) as dignified and proud travellers. I’m from India and most of us shower all reverence on our elders, but modernity has marred this spirit here, too.” According to the Oxford Dictionaries, respect is “A feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements”. But if older people have lost their status as advisors, mentors and guardians of our communal knowledge, can they demand respect on the grounds of age and experience 56 Log into www.cr5.co.uk your local community website! alone? Twenty-something Lifestyle blogger Michael Tawiah expresses the views of many young people today when he says: “Respect should be a choice and not a forced thing ... personally, I’m not going to respect someone just because they tell me to. We should all appreciate and be accepting and understanding of each other.” Angie Jardine, a commentator on the website Soapboxie.com, says “Modern life has changed out of all recognition in a very short time and the memories of my 1950s childhood, for instance, are now a history of another way of life; a life that may seem almost unbelievable to the technologyladen youth of today.” However, Angie believes that young people can still benefit from listening to the stories of parents and grandparents: “Would we have learnt anything about how a civilised society should be run if the survivors of two world wars and, in particular the Holocaust, had not told their stories to someone who listened? There is usually some tantalising nugget of information in the reminiscences of old folk from which something can be learned about the past and where we came from.” Today it’s not just warm words of wisdom that older people bring to the table. In 2010 the charity WRVS estimated that over-65s contributed over £40bn to the UK economy through taxes, spending power, volunteering and caring, and this figure is predicted to reach £77bn by 2030. 40,000 of WRVS’ own volunteers are over sixty-five years old, serving people in different ways, from offering trips to hospital to arranging social activities. So maybe, if we’re looking for respect, we simply need to be more proactive in flagging up the good things that our caring and committed older citizens already contribute to society.
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