Siouxland Magazine - Volume 3 Issue 3

Siouxland Magazine | Balance /42
Ask the Therapist
By Gladys Smith
Question: Over the course of the pandemic,
I’ve lost touch with the family and friends
who had been an important part of my life.
Although I miss them and want to reconnect
with them, thinking about doing so makes
me feel anxious and afraid. How do I deal
with this lingering fear of connecting with my
loved ones again?
Response: The COVID pandemic has brought
about the need for social distancing, quarantine,
and isolation to protect the health of our vulnerable
populations. Unfortunately, this isolation has created
what Michael L. Stallard, and Katherine P. Stallard,
2020, refer to as an “epidemic of loneliness”. The
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report
that loneliness can contribute to an increase in stress
and anxiety. According to the Stallards, we shouldn’t
ignore our “primal human need for social connection
as it appears to improve our performance of the
cardiovascular, endocrine and immune systems,
which can help reduce the risk of contracting
COVID-19”. The neuroscientist, Matthew Lieberman,
refers to connection as “a superpower that makes
humans happier and more productive”.
In an article entitled, “How to Be Sensitive to Your
Mental Health During COVID-19”, 5/21/20, licensed
therapists Lindsay Potts and Trisha Palencer, state that
it’s important to understand that anxiety is a normal
response to the pandemic. With the vast amount of
changes we’ve had to process and deal with, it can
leave one feeling overwhelmed. The social isolation
and lack of connection to others can exacerbate
these feelings.
The American Psychological Association’s 2021
“Stress in America” report states that “nearly half
of Americans say they feel uneasy thinking about
in-person interaction once the pandemic ends”.
Fortunately, there are steps you can take to manage
your feelings of loneliness and anxiety and move
towards reconnecting with others. Potts and Palencer,
2020, state that one of the first steps you can take is
acknowledging your feelings and realizing that they
are a normal response to the changes brought about
by the pandemic.
Taking small steps and using caution when
reconnecting with others can be helpful in managing
your anxiety and fears. In his article entitled, “Why
We’re Scared for the Pandemic to End,”Dastagir,
2021, states that the worse thing we could do is
completely avoid things causing us anxiety because
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avoidance can work in the short term but it impairs us in
the long run”. When avoidance becomes our go-to for
dealing with anxiety, it can actually reinforce feelings of
fear and anxiety.
As a way to manage your fear and anxiety, it’s helpful to
develop and adhere to a daily routine. Having a routine
in your life adds structure and a measure of predictability.
Predictability contributes to feelings of safety, relaxation,
and calm. Don’t forget to include in your daily routine
eating a healthy diet, getting some exercise (preferably
outdoors), staying hydrated, and practicing good sleep
hygiene. Although getting good sleep is difficult when
experiencing stress and anxiety, it’s a critical function in
managing those feelings. I find it helps to try different
ways to relax before bedtime. Many benefit from the
use of aromatherapy products, especially lavender, as it
has a natural calming effect. There are also phone apps
you can listen to at bedtime that promote feelings of
relaxation and aid in falling asleep.
In our quest to stay updated on what’s happening
around us, we’re often glued to our televisions, phones,
computers, etc. With all the negative things we come
across while staying informed, allowing your brain to
unplug and take breaks can help quiet your feelings of
anxiety and stress and cultivate more positive feelings.
You can do this by taking meditative walks outside while
focusing on how your five senses are experiencing
nature. If you’re artistically inclined, try using your talent
in this area to express your feelings. I often recommend
journaling to both express and process feelings as this
can lead to new and creative ways to address our present
situation.