Shadow and Bone

holding on still. Despite all the luxuries of the Little Palace,
despite my newfound powers, despite Mal’s silence, I held on.
Baghra was right. I’d thought I was making such an effort,
but deep down, some part of me just wanted to go home to
Mal. Some part of me hoped that this had all been a mistake,
that the Darkling would realize his error and send me back to
the regiment, that Mal would realize how much he’d missed
me, that we’d grow old together in our meadow. Mal had
moved on, but I was still standing frightened before those
three mysterious figures, holding tight to his hand.
It was time to let go. That day on the Shadow Fold, Mal had
saved my life, and I had saved his. Maybe that was meant to
be the end of us.
The thought filled me with grief, grief for the dreams we’d
shared, for the love I’d felt, for the hopeful girl I would never
be again. That grief flooded through me, dissolving a knot that
I hadn’t even known was there. I closed my eyes, feeling tears
slide down my cheeks, and I reached out to the thing within
me that I’d kept hidden for so long. I’m sorry, I whispered to
it.
I’m sorry I left you so long in the dark.
I’m sorry, but I’m ready now.
I called and the light answered. I felt it rushing toward me
from every direction, skimming over the lake, skittering over
the golden domes of the Little Palace, under the door and
through the walls of Baghra’s cottage. I felt it everywhere. I
opened my hands and the light bloomed right through me,
filling the room, illuminating the stone walls, the old tile oven,
and every angle of Baghra’s strange face. It surrounded me,
blazing with heat, more powerful and more pure than ever
before because it was all mine. I wanted to laugh, to sing, to
shout. At last, there was something that belonged wholly and
completely to me.
“Good,” said Baghra, squinting in the sunlight. “Now we
work.”