Issue 1| 2023

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THE STORY OF RONNIE HOPKINS for it! Have some fun! You deserve this. Everybody has it better than you. Your mom’s sick. Your dad’s a drug addict. God cheated you. Life cheated you. Everybody cheated you.” Anger and self-pity fueled me for decades. It never mattered that I knew that what I was doing was wrong. My inner voice always urged me to move forward. I was a victim, and the world owed me. As far back as I can remember, I’ve felt sorry for myself. It started in elementary school when I began comparing my home life to what I imagined my peers experienced. I could never pinpoint exactly what they had that I didn’t, but I knew it was better. I lost sight of any good thing in my life and focused only on the negative. I loved my family and knew they loved me, but our home was dysfunctional and chaotic. Dad was a full-blown crack cocaine addict and alcoholic. His addiction brought much grief into our home, especially for my older brother, whom Dad abused. My brother was PHOTO BY SWEETBEE PHOTOGRAPHY 24 Issue 01 / 2023 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
my father’s stepson; perhaps that’s why he targeted him so fiercely. Whatever the reason, it made me uncomfortable because Dad treated me like the golden child. Dad’s addiction led him in and out of jail and eventually to prison. It also caused us to move a lot. By the time I was 15, we had moved ten times. My mother was loving, but she had her own struggles, primarily due to her battle with diabetes. I don’t remember a time when she wasn’t in intense pain or homebound. She ultimately became blind and addicted to prescription pain pills. Her addiction and physical misery made it difficult for her to be emotionally present for my brother and me, but she did the best she could. Extended family provided much-needed support. My grandmother, aunt, and uncle loved our family well. We often attended church together. I heard many stories about Jesus when I was a kid. Early on, I believed that God had sent His Son to die for me. I even prayed to receive His gift of eternal salvation. But as often happens, my Christian faith stopped at my head and never settled in my heart. I had no relationship with God outside of the church, nor was I interested in developing one. To me, God was to blame for the chaos in my home, especially Mom’s sickness. She passed when I was 15, and that was just proof that God didn’t care about us. Dad was in prison then, and my brother had moved from West Virginia to Ohio. I felt so alone, lost, and overwhelmed by the uncertainty of my future. Where was God, and why was He allowing me to endure such hardships? Anger pumped through my veins as I recounted how He had cheated me. My Aunt Kathy and Uncle Herb, a kind Christian couple, welcomed me into their home. They loved, accepted, and supported me daily, and they modeled God’s sacrificial love and faithfulness. Through them, I learned the benefits of hard work and integrity and experienced a stable home life for the first time. But the anger, resentment, and self-pity inside kept me from accepting their love or God’s gift of a new life. I spent the best years of my life at my aunt and uncle’s home, yet I wasn’t satisfied. By focusing only on the things I didn’t have, I forfeited the very things I had longed for in a family. During my two years in their home, I partied, smoked, cussed, and messed around with girls. I occasionally dabbled in weed. Tired of their watchful eye, I devised a plan for my brother to obtain legal guardianship of me. Because I was 17, I could make that foolish choice without my aunt and uncle’s permission. They knew it would not end well for me as my brother was involved with drugs too. The court granted my request, and I moved to Ohio. My brother enrolled me in high school, but after only six months, I dropped out and dove headfirst into a life of destruction. I traded weed for methamphetamines, and for the next 13 years, I served a harsh master. I did whatever I had to do to satisfy my addiction, including manufacturing and selling the drug myself. My choices caught up with me when I was 30, and My Christian faith stopped at my head and never settled in my heart. I was arrested. It was the first time I’d ever been in serious trouble, and there I was, facing prison time. While in solitary confinement in jail, I came across a Bible. I opened it a few times, but my heart of stone couldn’t receive anything it had to offer. I still blamed God for my miserable life. The day before my sentencing hearing, my lawyer visited and told me he was getting me a great deal. His promises brought me a sense of hope. That night I decided I’d better make one more deal. “God,” I said, “if You’ll come through for me tomorrow, I’ll follow You. Do this for me, and I’ll trust You. I’ll even read the Bible.” But God wasn’t playing my Let’s Make a Deal game. The lawyer didn’t show up for court. Instead, some wet-behind-the-ears, state- appointed attorney represented me. This new guy knew nothing about my case, and the judge sentenced me to a mandatory three years in prison with no possibility of early release. I sat in disbelief as life as I knew it came to an end. The officer took me back to solitary confinement. The clanging of the chains connected to my hands and feet was the only sound in the corridor. As I shuffled, I searched for some emotion but felt numb. Back in my cell, I punched the wall to feel something. Anything. Nothing. I turned on the small 5-station radio in my cell. I couldn’t stand the silence. “Drunk on a Plane” by Dierks Bentley echoed through the cell. I quickly changed the station. I wasn’t in the mood. Suddenly, “How He Loves” by David Crowder Band rang through the emptiness. It’s a song about the unconditional love of God, and the words brought me to my knees. It was a surreal moment. Years of anger and resentment toward God drained from my heart in tears. I was so tired of fighting for my rightful place A rebellious spirit led to Ronnie’s arrest. Pictured above is his mug shot from 2014. VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM Issue 01 / 2023 25
Page 1 and 2: REAL PEOPLE | REAL STORIES | REAL H
Page 3 and 4: ISSUE 1, JANUARY 2023 “God saved
Page 5 and 6: ISSUE 1, JANUARY 2023 CONTENTS 8 9
Page 7 and 8: Through the stories of Victorious L
Page 9 and 10: STEPPING FORWARD Flourish in His Ca
Page 11 and 12: My new look quickly attracted the w
Page 13 and 14: PHOTO BY ARIZONA PORTRAITS PHOTOGRA
Page 15 and 16: TRANSFORMED LIVES PHOTO BY LYSSA YA
Page 17 and 18: while my children participated in a
Page 19 and 20: STEPPING FORWARD BENCHED BY GOD? US
Page 21 and 22: It was too much to bear, and I step
Page 23: PHOTO BY ARIZONA PORTRAITS PHOTOGRA
Page 27 and 28: Above: Ronnie had John 3:30 tattooe
Page 29 and 30: TRANSFORMED LIVES more of a champio
Page 31 and 32: STEPPING FORWARD Your Pain Has Purp
Page 33 and 34: WANT TO KNOW JESUS? “Come to me,

Issue 1| 2023

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