Frank Magazine Issue 600.pdf - Besthostingplanever.com
Frank Magazine Issue 600.pdf - Besthostingplanever.com
Frank Magazine Issue 600.pdf - Besthostingplanever.com
You also want an ePaper? Increase the reach of your titles
YUMPU automatically turns print PDFs into web optimized ePapers that Google loves.
FRANK’S SPECTACULAR 600TH ISSUE RETROSPECTIVAPALOOZA<br />
INSERT CLEVER HEAD HERE<br />
IT WAS U.S. PREZ LYNDON B. JOHNSON WHO ONCE SAID SOMETHING<br />
TO THE EFFECT THAT IF HE EVER WALKED ON WATER, THE NEWPAPER<br />
HEADLINE WOULD READ, “PRESIDENT CAN’T SWIM.”<br />
In the great tradition of the old Fleet Street tabloids, what <strong>Frank</strong> headlines<br />
sacrifice in realism, they more than make up for in pithiness and wit<br />
(Shurely, shome mishtake! — ed.).<br />
Without further ado, here are some of our favourite headlines from the<br />
past 599 issues...<br />
� Mathers in a lather (<strong>Frank</strong> 25)<br />
� Andy in a Lynching mood (25)<br />
� Skinny dipping with John and Mavis (45)<br />
� Pace-saving decision (49)<br />
� Patricia wants judges by the balls (58)<br />
� Al Abraham to the miscue (61)<br />
� Is your lawyer living in the style<br />
to which you should be accustomed? (70)<br />
� Benefit dance to be held for Jodrey family (77)<br />
� Mary rapes the public purse, again (82)<br />
� King’s accusation surfaces: Hankey Panky alleged (90)<br />
� Excellent author writes<br />
very nice book (94)<br />
� Finance minister Greg<br />
Kerr and wife<br />
possessedby strange<br />
cross-border shopping<br />
demon! (97)<br />
�����<br />
(88)<br />
� Endangered species alert — Tory<br />
ats threaten fur-bearing animal (98)<br />
� Brian & Mila, The secret wedding<br />
photos (100)<br />
� Irene is dead — finally! (102)<br />
� Wife swapping at the NS Liquor<br />
Commission(103)<br />
� Donovans get millions while<br />
local actors starve (105)<br />
� Is Headless hairless? (119)<br />
� Metro Centre madness: They fired the<br />
organ grinder and kept the monkey on (109)<br />
� The nine lives of the publisher’s daughter (123)<br />
� Sydney mayor to marry dog catcher! (125)<br />
� Deborah Coyne: The woman who said “Yes, Yes, Yes!”<br />
to Pierre Trudeau — but No! to Canada (127)<br />
� Finance minister goofs off to play doctor while N.S. goes broke (129)<br />
� Alison, Dale, donairs and a night in jail! (139)<br />
� Scandal rocks Bluenose! Sex, greed & ego...<br />
The rape of a national treasure! (149)<br />
� Ross Bragg clasps wild man to his bosom (155)<br />
� Why Mary is doomed to be fat (159)<br />
� Paul Martin — The ideal man to run Canada onto the rocks (162)<br />
� Savage finds Downe syndrome cure (164)<br />
� Sex doc gets off! (169)<br />
� Barbie from hell terrorizes Eastern Shore (170)<br />
� Giggles takes a lawyer husband...(173)<br />
� The Stalinization of little MITV (182)<br />
� Anne snubs Gene, Ms. Snowbird misses <strong>com</strong>poser’s funeral (187)<br />
� Theresa’s dress stuns a gala Sydney social event (189)<br />
� When Judge Jill was a beauty queen (194)<br />
� Monster home eats up Young Avenue (198)<br />
� Senator Al & Ms. Size 42DD (215)<br />
� Now playing on Spring Garden: Sir Laurence O’Greenspan<br />
in Much Ado About Nothing One Million Dollars Please (219)<br />
� Ex-nun in hot pursuit of Port Hawkesbury barrister...(225)<br />
14 ATLANTIC CANADA FRANK DECEMBER 21, 2010<br />
� MLA’s son in midnight cape r... Is that a salami in your pocket<br />
or are you just happy to see an RCMP officer? (225)<br />
� It’s finally over between Cathy Jones and me...<br />
Buxom Buddhist bags bridegroom (229)<br />
� The day the women’s jail warden had her dog shot (230)<br />
� Drunken, amorous psych prof’s victim admits: “I still love him!” (231)<br />
� Dal donates $100,000-plus a year to the Dale Godsoe fund (231)<br />
� Pat Pottie, quintessential sleaze (235)<br />
� Joe works tax debt off at $5.35 an hour (237)<br />
����� (239)<br />
� Why the graduate should stick with Mrs. Robinson (242)<br />
� Smell of decaying flesh pervades Sackville Street (242)<br />
� Glace Bay dogcatcher put down! (243)<br />
� Mrs. Mannslaughter mugged in Cuba! (243)<br />
� Alexa feels old age creeping over her (244)<br />
� Are Cape Bretoners stupid enough<br />
to fall for Vince Maclean again? (244)<br />
� Arrogant young man escapes punitive damages (247)<br />
� Debert alert! (250)<br />
� Aggrieved Dartmouth wife <strong>com</strong>plains to Judicial Council:<br />
When the other woman is a judge (257)<br />
� SPCA gassed three staffers (263)<br />
� Randy Butterball: The stupidest man in politics (266)<br />
� NSGEU weasels talk poor and spend big (267)<br />
� <strong>Frank</strong>’s 1997 couple of the year flames out:<br />
The 90-day marriage! (270)<br />
� Joe Shannon: The millionaire who once drew pogey (280)<br />
� South End beauty kidnapped, brainwashed & forced<br />
into marriage by the socialist hordes... (284)<br />
� Joel is tickled pink with himself (289)<br />
� After years of living in socialist splitsville, is...<br />
Wedded sex <strong>com</strong>ing for Alexa? (290)<br />
� Mighty Mildred’s Mysterious Meltdown (292)<br />
� Did cheeky MP Peter bare all? (313)<br />
� Absentee Mum of the Millennium:<br />
Anne, where were you when she needed you? (315)<br />
� The Blair Witch-hunt project (326)<br />
� Schooner him than me? (327)<br />
� Nancy Regan moves to North West Arm...<br />
Bingo caller one step closer to Spryfield (328)<br />
� Capers’ favourite talking head is definitely a dead parrot (331)<br />
� The Murphys move the couch (336)<br />
� Lesbian lover accused in fiery slaying of Nova Scotia woman (339)<br />
� From here to eternity: the wait for a cab ride in Halifax (341)<br />
� Rowe, Rowe, Rowe your boatload of cash (344)<br />
� Hank Snow, Daddy<br />
Dearest? (359) �����<br />
� 911 call brings<br />
cops to Justice<br />
(344)<br />
Minister’s cabin<br />
(360)<br />
� Bishop Colin appointed<br />
<strong>Frank</strong>land circulation manager!<br />
(369)<br />
� Mary Clancy’s horny hound!<br />
(369)
Change language