in your family's history with AtlantiCare Primary Care Plus.

Turkessa Lee
Though Turkessa Lee has worked as a social worker
with almost every population from foster care to
probation and lots in between, she never expected
that her experience would grow to include the demise of
her own marriage. And yet, when it did, despite her years of
experience, the divorce shook her world. “I had such a long
life with him that I never imagined a life without him,” Lee
said of her ex-husband.
Though in the midst of her divorce Lee was understandably
grief-stricken, she has come through the ending of her
marriage with clarity and grace, and a brand new book. After
the Gavel: The ABC’s of Happiness After Divorce is “designed
to provide readers with practical ways of coping and healing
from divorce,” according to the publisher website.
“The book provides people with therapeutic things they can
do...practical things they can do to feel better,” explained
Lee. Stemming from her own experience, After the Gavel
Turkessa Lee
22 | The Boardwalk Journal | April 2013
sums up for readers the lessons Lee learned from her
divorce, primarily, to make yourself a priority. “I was putting
myself at the bottom of the list...the book is about bringing
your own self up,” Lee said.
While After the Gavel is a small book (92 pages) it is chock
full of information and practical advice, taking the format
of a workbook or journal with writing and thinking prompts.
It’s written in the most user-friendly way possible: with a
‘lesson’ in ABC’s. A. Ask for What you Want. B. Believe You
are Worthy of Love. C. Count Your Blessings in the Midst of
Trouble. And the list goes on, providing readers with 26 hardwon
principles for healing from divorce.
Lee asks the pivotal question, “What are you willing to
invest in yourself?” and advises that “We need to know we
are worthy of love with or without another individual.” In
her own efforts to come to peace with her divorce, Lee did
whatever it took to raise herself up so she could be a better
mother to her girls, and a better person for herself, finding
solace in journaling, and inspiration in power words—words
she wrote on index cards and placed all over her home and
belongings in an effort to remind herself of her own worth
day in and day out. Lee also strongly advocates creating and
surrounding yourself with an “all-star team”—people who are
doing what you want to be doing—as well as taking physical
time for oneself, especially if you have kids. “To give them
the best of you, you must have time away...you need time
without your kids.”
And though Lee is fresh off writing After the Gavel, she’s
been busy outside the publishing world as well. From her
job as a school social worker at Pleasantville High School
to her work with the Rites of Passage Program, a youth
empowerment initiative, Lee spends most of her time
helping those around her. Lee has also just established her
own business entity, called Permission to Have a Voice,
LLC. Its mission? To “give life to your story”. Lee’s goal is to
“co-write stories” with and for people “who may not have
the words to express their points of view or struggle with
articulating”, and co-create unique masterpieces that will
“liberate and educate others.”
While Lee is busily and happily collaborating on a number of
projects right now, her biggest role is as mother to her two
young daughters, ages 5 and 7. “I bring my kids everywhere,”
Lee said of bringing them to community service events and
raising them to understand ‘giving back’. “I want them to
know, no matter what goes on in the world, we’re together.”
After the Gavel: The ABC’s of Happiness After Divorce can
be purchased online at Amazon.com, Xlibris.com, or BN.com.
Lee can be followed on Twitter @TurkessaLee.