Social and Psychological Manipulation - Dean Amory
Unlike people who are trying to influence, persuade or convince others, manipulators work with unfair means to get what they want. They do not respect the personal rights of their victims. They violate the victim's integrity, work with hidden agendas and deliberately use dishonest tricks like faulty reasoning, coercion, blackmail and lying in an attempt to control the victim's actions. Manipulation is about suiting the manipulator's advantage or purpose only, often at the expense of the victim. Yet, it is often difficult to know when you are being manipulated: manipulators do all they can to convince you that you are the one who is to benefit most from their actions and that they are acting in good faith. If we were aware that we are being manipulated, would we allow ourselves to fall victim to it - and how would we defend ourselves against it? That is where this book comes in handy: it explains the tricks manipulators use and teaches you how to best defend and
Unlike people who are trying to influence, persuade or convince others, manipulators work with unfair means to get what they want. They do not respect the personal rights of their victims. They violate the victim's integrity, work with hidden agendas and deliberately use dishonest tricks like faulty reasoning, coercion, blackmail and lying in an attempt to control the victim's actions. Manipulation is about suiting the manipulator's advantage or purpose only, often at the expense of the victim.
Yet, it is often difficult to know when you are being manipulated: manipulators do all they can to convince you that you are the one who is to benefit most from their actions and that they are acting in good faith.
If we were aware that we are being manipulated, would we allow ourselves to fall victim to it - and how would we defend ourselves against it?
That is where this book comes in handy: it explains the tricks manipulators use and teaches you how to best defend and
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3. How to Pick Up on Manipulative Behavior<br />
Sources:<br />
http://www.wikihow.com/Pick-Up-on-Manipulative-Behavior<br />
edited by Iqbal Osman, Teresa, Tipsy, Flickety <strong>and</strong> 19 others<br />
http://aloftyexistence.wordpress.com/2011/04/11/manipulative-personality/<br />
http://www.way-of-the-mind.com/manipulative-people.html<br />
3.1 <strong>Manipulation</strong> operates in sneaky ways<br />
Manipulative people are not obvious because they act in a sneaky way. When someone is openly<br />
aggressive, at least we know what is happening <strong>and</strong> can react accordingly.<br />
But with manipulation, it’s different: we know something is wrong but we can't pinpoint what it is. We<br />
find ourselves on the defensive <strong>and</strong> we tend to hate ourselves for it because we think we are making up<br />
things. However, usually our feelings are right: we are being manipulated.<br />
3.2 <strong>Manipulation</strong> is about control<br />
Manipulators attempt to indirectly control or influence the actions <strong>and</strong> behavior of others. Instead of<br />
being direct with their methods, the manipulator uses underh<strong>and</strong>ed tactics to force their will. Because<br />
they are subtle, the manipulative personality easily goes undetected <strong>and</strong> overlooked, <strong>and</strong> the person or<br />
people being manipulated don’t realize what’s going on until it’s too late. Or not at all. They may<br />
believe that they are obligated to do what the manipulator wishes, <strong>and</strong> feel guilty if they don’t. The<br />
manipulative personality may be a family member, friend, or colleague.<br />
<strong>Manipulation</strong> refers to making attempts at indirectly influencing someone else's behavior or actions. As<br />
human beings, our emotions often cloud our judgments making it difficult to see the reality behind<br />
hidden agendas or motives in different forms of behavior. The controlling aspects or shrewdness linked<br />
to manipulation are sometimes very subtle <strong>and</strong> may be easily overlooked, buried under feelings of<br />
obligation, love, or habit. In this article you'll learn some ways to pick up on manipulative behavior<br />
occurring around you, so that you can sort it rather than jump to it.<br />
3.3 Underst<strong>and</strong> the manipulative personality.<br />
They're not always obvious because they play a silent game of building up obligations toward them,<br />
that end up with you feeling guilty, pressured, <strong>and</strong> obliged to carry out things for their sake even<br />
though you're still wondering how things got to this point. Some of the characteristics of a<br />
manipulative personality include:<br />
A martyr style personality.<br />
This personality type behaves as if he or she is being considerate toward others but is actually messing<br />
up considerateness with a need to be significant to you.<br />
By "martyring" themselves, they are doing things nobody has asked of them or wants them to do but in<br />
the process creates a bind when they do them.<br />
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