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Feelings and relationships WORK Registered childcare For details of registered childcare in Northern Ireland, contact NIPPA (contact details on page 148) or your local Health and Social Care Trust. In England call the national ChildcareLink on 0800 0960296 or visit www.childcarelink.gov.uk If you enjoy your work and the company of those you work with, you may have rather mixed feelings when the time comes to stop work before your baby is born. Try to make the most of these few weeks to enjoy doing the things you want to do at your own pace. It is also a good opportunity to make some new friends. You may meet other mothers at your antenatal classes (see pages 64–5) or you may get to know more people living close by. You may have decided that you are going to spend some time at home with your baby or you may be planning to return to work, either full or part time, fairly soon after the birth. If you know that you will be going back to work, or even if you think you might be, you will need to start thinking about who will look after your baby well in advance. It is not always easy to find a satisfactory childcare arrangement and it may take you some time. Any decision you make about childcare will be determined both by your income and by the kind of facilities available locally. You may be lucky enough to have a relative willing to provide care. If not, you should contact your Children’s Information Service (in Northern Ireland your local Health and Social Care Trust) for a list of registered childminders and nurseries. You may also want to consider organising care in your own home, either on your own or sharing with other parents. Care in your own home does not need to be registered, but you should satisfy yourself that your carer is experienced and trained to care for babies. However, to claim financial help with the costs, either through tax credits or tax relief on help from your employer, the carer must be approved through the Government’s Childcare Approval Scheme. You can find out more at www.childcareapprovalscheme.co.uk. 44
Feelings and relationships C OPING ALONE If you’re pregnant and on your own, it’s even more important that there are people with whom you can share your feelings and who can offer you support. Sorting out problems, whether personal or medical, is often difficult when you are by yourself, and it’s better to find someone to talk to rather than to let things get you down. You may find it encouraging to meet other mothers who have also gone through pregnancy on their own. Gingerbread (see page 148) is a selfhelp organisation for one-parent families which has a network of local groups and can offer you information and advice. They will be able to put you in touch with other mothers in a similar situation if you wish. If money is an immediate concern, read Rights and benefits (pages 130–136) for information on what you can claim and your employment rights. Your local Jobcentre Plus/Social Security OfficeJobs & Benefits office or Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB) will be able to give you more advice. If you have housing problems, contact your local CAB or the Northern Ireland Housing Executive. The National Council for One Parent Families can also supply information on a range of topics from benefits to maintenance (see page 148). There may be a local support group in your area. Ask your midwife or health visitor. Don’t feel that, just because you don’t have a partner, you have to go to antenatal visits and cope with labour on your own. You have as much right as anyone else to be accompanied by the person you choose – a friend, sister, or perhaps your mother. Involve your ‘labour partner’ in birth classes if you can and let him or her know what you want from them. There may be antenatal classes in your area run especially for single women. Ask your midwife. Think about how you will manage after the birth. Will there be people around to help and support? If there is no one who can give you support, it might help to discuss your situation with a social worker. Your doctor or hospital can refer you or you can contact the social services department of your local council, or in Northern Ireland your local Health and Social Care Trust, directly. If you’re considering adoption or fostering, you should discuss this with a social worker. ‘The baby’s dad has gone. He wanted the baby at first but when things started to happen he didn’t like it, so he’s gone. But my mum has been to all my antenatal classes with me and everything, so she knows what’s going on.’ ‘Sometimes I feel really low and think, “Oh God, I’m only 18 and it’s for the rest of my life.” Every time I go out I’ve got to get a baby sitter and things.’ ‘I talked to the hospital social worker about things and she told me all about managing on my own.’ LONE PARENT HELPLINE call free on 0800 018 5026 (9am–5pm Mon–Fri, 9am-8pm Wed) 45
Page 1 and 2: Pre the nancy gbook Your complete g
Page 3 and 4: Pre the nancy gbook Your complete g
Page 5 and 6: 11 LABOUR AND BIRTH Getting ready f
Page 7 and 8: Your pregnancy at a glance 16-20 we
Page 9 and 10: Introduction Every parent is differ
Page 11 and 12: Your health in pregnancy • Eat pl
Page 13 and 14: Your health in pregnancy VEGETARIAN
Page 15 and 16: Your health in pregnancy S MOKING W
Page 17 and 18: Your health in pregnancy P HYSICAL
Page 19 and 20: Your health in pregnancy Foot exerc
Page 21 and 22: obstetrician. If you do catch toxop
Page 23 and 24: 2 Conception To understand about co
Page 25 and 26: Conception T HE WOMAN’ S MONTHLY
Page 27 and 28: Conception T HE BEST TIME TO GET PR
Page 29 and 30: Conception K NOWING THAT YOU’ RE
Page 31 and 32: How the baby develops WEEKS 4-5 Wee
Page 33 and 34: How the baby develops WEEKS 15-22 T
Page 35 and 36: 4 Deciding where to have your baby
Page 37 and 38: Deciding where to have your baby HO
Page 39 and 40: Deciding where to have your baby B
Page 41 and 42: 5 Feelings and relationships From t
Page 43 and 44: Feelings and relationships WORRYING
Page 45: Feelings and relationships FAMILIES
Page 49 and 50: 6 Mainly for men Some pregnancies h
Page 51 and 52: Mainly for men PRACTICAL SUPPORT Yo
Page 53 and 54: 7 Antenatal care and antenatal clas
Page 55 and 56: Antenatal care and antenatal classe
Page 69 and 70: The feeding question B REASTFEEDING
Page 71 and 72: The feeding question Support contac
Page 73 and 74: The feeding question HOW OFTEN AND
Page 75 and 76: The feeding question B OTTLE FEEDIN
Page 77 and 78: The feeding question The temperatur
Page 79 and 80: 9 Problems Your body has a great de
Page 81 and 82: Problems FEELING HOT IN PREGNANCY D
Page 83 and 84: Problems can empty it properly. The
Page 85 and 86: Problems VAGINAL DISCHARGE Almost a
Page 87 and 88: 10 What you need for the baby This
Page 89 and 90: What you need for the baby O UT AND
Page 91 and 92: 11 Labour and birth This chapter de
Page 93 and 94: Labour and birth PAIN RELIEF IN LAB
Page 95 and 96: Labour and birth • your contracti
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Labour and birth AT THE HOSPITAL Go
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Labour and birth • The heartbeat
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Labour and birth You can have your
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Labour and birth treatment takes ab
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Labour and birth A vaginal breech d
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When pregnancy goes wrong been due.
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13 The first days with your new bab
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The first days with your new baby c
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The first days with your new baby b
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Babies who need special care I NCUB
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The early weeks: you L OOKING AFTER
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The early weeks: you T HE ‘ BABY
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16 The early weeks: your baby The b
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The early weeks: your baby Sadly, w
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The early weeks: your baby CHANGING
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The early weeks: your baby WASHING
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The early weeks: your baby W HERE T
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as green, leafy vegetables and brea
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Rights and benefits How much is it?
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Who gets it? Pregnant women and new
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Rights and benefits You must have n
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• your baby is born before your M
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Rights and benefits (MAT B1 form),
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Rights and benefits Giving notice f
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Rights and benefits If you return t
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• state that this is an applicati
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USEFUL ORGANISATIONS Some of these
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In Northern Ireland: Northern Irela
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INDEX A abnormalities tests to dete
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The Pregnancy Book “It contains e
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