Bisson_rucker_billys.. - Rudy Rucker

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“He doesn’t do things,” said Billy. §§ First Billy picked up the leaves, then he went to his room. The fairy was sitting on his bed, next to the steering wheel. “What do fairies do?” asked Billy. “Nothing much,” said the fairy. “Sometimes we kill people.” “Huh?” “When God wants a new angel in Heaven, sometimes him. Or her.” “Are you here to kill me?” asked Billy. “Of course not,” said the fairy. He sends a fairy down to kill Billy thought about that. “My Mom doesn’t believe in fairies,” he said. “So what,” said the fairy. “So she says you are just make-believe. That’s what.” “That’s because she’s stupid.” “My Mom’s not stupid.” “That’s what you think,” said the fairy. Billy had an idea. “Wait here,” he said. Billy went into the kitchen. §§ “Come quick,” he said. “I want to show you something.” 16
“Not the fairy, Billy,” his mother said. She was baking a pie. “Can’t you see I’m busy?” “Please, Mom,” said Billy. Billy’s mother wiped her hands and followed him into his bedroom. The fairy was gone. But that was OK. “Look, Mom!” said Billy. He showed her the wet spot on the bed. “That’s where it was sitting.” “Billy,” said Billy’s mother. §§ “Billy’s growing up,” said Billy’s mother at dinner. “Good. Then maybe he can do what he’s told,” said Billy’s father. “Like pick up the leaves out of the driveway.” “But I did,” said Billy. “Sir,” said his father. “But I did, sir.” “Then where did I find this little item?” Billy’s father pulled a leaf from his shirt pocket and set it on the table. “They fall off the trees,” said Billy. Billy put on his pajamas. The fairy was sitting on the bed. “I saw your guy today,” the fairy said. “Dale Earnhardt.” Dale Earnhardt was dead. Billy had seen the crash on TV. §§ 17
Page 2 and 3: Text copyright © Terry Bisson 2009
Page 5 and 6: BILLY AND THE ANTS It was a beautif
Page 7 and 8: “Coming!” he said. §§ “Your
Page 9 and 10: There was an ant between him and th
Page 11: Then it snapped Billy in half. “W
Page 14 and 15: “I never said that,” said the f
Page 18 and 19: “No you didn’t,” Billy said.
Page 20 and 21: “Of course not,” said the fairy
Page 23 and 24: BILLY AND THE BULLDOZER Billy had a
Page 25 and 26: The sand was already dry. Some of i
Page 27: “What happened next door?” aske
Page 30 and 31: “Hey,” said Billy. The unicorn
Page 32 and 33: “After you go to bed,” said the
Page 34 and 35: “Girls like unicorns,” said Bil
Page 37 and 38: BILLY AND THE SPACEMEN “Look what
Page 39 and 40: “It’s a spear,” said the spac
Page 41: Billy knocked them into the water w
Page 44 and 45: “Of course not,” said Clyde.
Page 46 and 47: “Playing with dolls,” said Bill
Page 48 and 49: “I’m sorry I called you a sissy
Page 50: “We all make mistakes,” said th
Page 53 and 54: They gave Billy an axe and a long o
Page 55 and 56: As soon as he stepped ashore, Billy
Page 58 and 59: BILLY AND THE TIME SKATEBOARD “Go
Page 60 and 61: He grabbed it back. He pointed it t
Page 63 and 64: BILLY AND THE TALKING PLANT One day
Page 65 and 66: He took the magazine to the store a
Page 67 and 68:
“Eat your turkey,” said Billy
Page 69:
“Nothing,” said Billy. “We go
Page 72 and 73:
Billy hid behind the garbage can.
Page 74 and 75:
”You are too big,” said Billy.
Page 76 and 77:
After a while Billy got hungry. “
Page 78 and 79:
He got his gun out of the closet. I
Page 80 and 81:
The clowns made Billy’s father la
Page 83 and 84:
BILLY AND THE FLYING SAUCER “Hey,
Page 85:
“Sorry,” said Vernon. He held u
Page 88 and 89:
“You must be hooked,” said the
Page 91 and 92:
BILLY AND THE WITHC One day Billy
Page 93 and 94:
“Late again!” said Billy’s mo
Page 95 and 96:
He shot her through the head. He wa
Page 98 and 99:
BILLY IN DINOSAUR CITY “Pack up y
Page 100 and 101:
The next day Billy went to dinosaur
Page 102 and 103:
The next day, Billy took his magazi
Page 104 and 105:
“Aren’t you going to school?”
Page 106 and 107:
About the Author Terry Bisson has w
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Bisson_rucker_billys.. - Rudy Rucker

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