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• Voice Male Thank You! Publisher Says “Thank You!” The Men’s Resource Center for Change, publisher of Voice Male, receives community support from near and far. Hundreds of people have shared our inspiration and commitment, andcontributedtheirtime,services,andmoney toward a vision of personal and social transformation. As our programs and services continue to grow in size and scope, we see that the size and scope of our community support also expand. We are filled with deep gratitude at the outpouring of support. We hope the followingacknowledgmentscommunicateasenseof being part of a growing community of support. Thank you. Donated Space Network Chiropractic, Greenfield Northampton Council on Aging Fathers & Family Network Presenter Christopher Newman, YWCA Visitation Centers Grants The Kapler Foundation, Los Angeles In-Kind Donations Henion Bakery, Amherst Office/Voice Male Volunteers Susan Craig, Christopher Klunk, Joe Leslie, Bob and Jesse Mazer, Russ Pirkot, Gary Stone Facilitator Training Michael Burke, Michael Dover, Carl Erikson, Jerry Levinsky, Gábor Lukács, Bob Mazer, Tom Schuyt, Gary Stone As always, we extend our gratitude to the MRC BoardofDirectorsfortheongoingguidanceand support they give to this organization and all who are a part of it. We are also grateful to our volunteers who support us in so many ways. Double Play continued from page 9 Was that modeling in any way a plus for you as a pro athlete? As I grew up in the sports world, it made it easier. In the beginning it was very difficult for me, playing baseball in the minor leagues and then in the majors. Baseball taught me how to have a thick skin. In my house I was taught to have a thin skin. I’m really grateful to baseball for teaching me to have a thick skin. I want my kids to have thick skin. I remember getting really bent out of shape about stuff at home…that was fine in my house. As an adult, I’m grateful that baseball—it’s such a failure sport. In the clubhouse, you have a constant barrage of ridicule and banter that includes tearing each other down on a regular basis. As crazy as it sounds, it’s been really good for me personally. It’s the real world, it’s the way things work. If you’re too sensitive it affects you. I want my child to be able to handle what goes on. When you hear racist or sexist stuff in the clubhouse, what do you do? When you hear something racist or sexist you might say, not in an aggressive way, but a light way, “That was the worst possible word you could use in my house growing up.” It would be self-destructive to be confrontational. Internally, you have people brought up in different ways. There’s not a public forum with an open conversation about it. You may talk about it with guys who are sympathetic, or not. Generally speaking, baseball is a melting pot of races and financial backgrounds and upbringing, some people who have never been around somebody from a large city, only guys just like them. People handle it in different ways—like the swearing in the clubhouse or [lyrics] on the radio. Some guys don’t want their son hearing it, they only want Christian music; others say if you don’t like it, take your son out of here. Baseball players like former Sox outfielder Wil Cordero, José Canseco, Milton Bradley, and othershavebeenchargedwithdomesticassault and battery. How is that kind of issue seen frominsidetheclubhouse?Whataboutnow,if ithappenedwithoneofyourteammates?You havesomeauthoritybecauseofLisaandwhat happened to her. What would you say? Certainly, in my mind [domestic abuse] is unacceptable. How I would address that with a particular player is a completely different story. The right thing to do isn’t always to say something to the person about it. The person has to be ready to talk about it, ready to listen. If I didn’t think somebody was ready to listen I would never approach him. I wouldn’t understand how that would be my place to do that. But their respect level would drop immediately from other players. We kind of police ourselves. When somebody does something that’s not just embarrassing to the club but to themselves, you lose respect, and that’s the worst thing you can possibly lose in our clubhouse. Without that, you don’t have a platform, you don’t have the respect. You know about New York Yankees manager Joe Torre establishing the Safe at Home Foundation, also aimed at addressing domestic violence. Are you interested in working together with him? I’m so jealous that he has that name! I think it’s great—you talk about a guy with a platform and power, it probably doesn’t get much bigger than he has. He’s so respected in baseball and in New York, and it’s amazing and wonderful and we’re all very proud of what he’s doing. Do I see an opportunity for a collaboration? I would love that. He’s a busy guy, and [our foundation is] not completely off the ground. At some point in the future I would love to find a way to put it together and work with him. What is your vision for the foundation in the next seven to eight years? I’d like [the foundation] to be in shelters all over the country. I want to be making an impact improving women’s shelters, improving relationship skills for women and children, including boys and young men, in shelters, everywhere. We’re starting in a small area of Los Angeles County and with the shelter in Massachusetts. We have the Internet, we have our website, but I’d like to branch out all over the country. I’m playing baseball all the time, so my mom is hopefully going to share my vision, and we’ll see how much money we raise. VM 26
Men’s Resource Center for Change Programs & Services Administrative Staff Executive Director – Rob Okun Associate Director – Russell Bradbury-Carlin Development Director – Michael Dover Development Associate – Gretchen Craig Financial Manager – Paula Chadis Administrative Assistant – Ursula Shea Borneo Moving Forward Director – Russell Bradbury-Carlin Clinical Supervisor – Sara Elinoff-Acker Intake Coordinator/Court Liaison – Steve Trudel Partner Services Coordinator – Jan Eidelson Franklin County Coordinator – Joy Kaubin Hampden County Coordinator – Scott Girard Group Leaders – Sara Elinoff-Acker, Karen Fogliatti, Scott Girard, Steve Jefferson, Joy Kaubin, Dot LaFratta, Susan Omilian, Bill Patten, Tom Sullivan, Steve Trudel Support Programs Director – Allan Arnaboldi Support Group Facilitators – Allan Arnaboldi, MichaelBurke,JimDevlin,MichaelDover,DarrenEngstrom, Carl Erikson, Tim Gordon, Jerry Levinsky, Gábor Lukács, Bob Mazer, Rob Parfet, Tom Schuyt, Sheldon Snodgrass, Roger Stawasz, Bob Sternberg, Gary Stone, John Trainor, Peter Venman Youth Programs Director – Allan Arnaboldi Group Leader/Outreach Worker– Paul Collins Board of Directors Chair – Peter Jessop Clerk/Treasurer – Charles Bodhi Members – Gustavo Acosta, Jenny Daniell, Tom Gardner, Yoko Kato, Jonathan Klate Executive Director Emeritus – Steven Botkin Main Office: 236 North Pleasant St. • Amherst, MA 01002 • 413.253.9887 • Fax: 413.253.4801 Springfield Office: 29 Howard St. • Springfield, MA 01105 • 413.734.3438 E-mail: mrc@mrcforchange.org Website: www.mrcforchange.org Support Group Programs ■ Open Men’s Group Sundays 7-9 p.m. at the MRC Amherst office Tuesdays 6:45-8:45 p.m. at the Council on Aging, 240 Main St., Northampton. Wednesdays 7-9 p.m. in Greenfield at Network Chiropractic, 21 Mohawk Trail (lower Main St.). A facilitated drop-in group for men to talk about their lives and to support each other. ■ Men Who Have Experienced Childhood Abuse /Neglect Specifically for men who have experienced any kind of childhood abuse or neglect. Fridays 7 - 8:30 p.m. at the MRC. ■ Gay, Bisexual & Questioning Mondays 7 - 9 p.m. at the MRC. A facilitated drop-in group for gay, bisexual and questioning men to talk about their lives and support each other (not a discussion group). ■ GBQ Schmoozefest Events Seasonal events with catered food, art and music, opportunities for interacting with GBQ men and other men who love men from Springfield to Brattleboro and beyond. Fathering Programs ■ A variety of resources are available — Fathers and Family Network programs, lawyer referrals, parenting resources, workshops, presentations and conferences. Contact: (413) 253-9887 ext.10 Youth Programs ■ Young Men of Color Leadership Project Amherst ■ Short Term Groups, Workshops, Presentations and Consultations for Young Men and Youth- Serving Organizations Moving forward Anger Management, domestic violence intervention, youth violence prevention ■ Anger Management Various times for 15-week groups for men, women and young men at the MRC. For more information, call (413) 253-9887 ext. 23 ■ Domestic Violence Intervention A state-certified batterer intervention program serves both voluntary and court-mandated men who have been physically violent or verbally/emotionally abusive. Fee subsidies available. ■ Basic Groups Groups for self-referred and court-mandated men (40 weeks) are held in Amherst, Athol, Belchertown, Springfield, and Greenfield. ■ Follow-up Groups for men who have completed the basic program and want to continue working on these issues are available in Northampton, Greenfield and Amherst. ■ Partner Services Free phone support, resources, referrals and weekly support groups are available for partners of men in the MOVE program. ■ Prison Groups A weekly MOVE group is held at the Hampshire County Jail and House of Corrections. ■ Community Education and Training Workshops and training on domestic violence and clinical issues in batterer intervention are available. ■ Speakers’ Bureau Formerly abusive men who want to share their experiences with others to help prevent family violence are available to speak at schools and human service programs. ■ Youth Violence Prevention Services for teenage males who have been abusive with their families, peers, or dating partners. Contact: (413) 253-9588 ext.18 Workshops & training ■ Men & Divorce This workshop series can help you get your bearings and find your way through the divorce process to reach a successful conclusion in this transition. Six Sunday afternoons. At MRC, 236 North Pleasant St., Amherst. For information, call Allan (413) 253-9887, Ext. 10. ■ Workshops available to colleges, schools, human service organizations, and businesses on topics such as “Sexual Harassment Prevention and Response,” “Strategies and Skills for Educating Men,” “Building Men’s Community,” and “Challenging Homophobia,” among other topics. Specific trainings and consultations also available. Publications ■ Voice Male Published quarterly, the MRC magazine includes articles, essays, reviews and resources, and services related to men and masculinity. ■ Children, Lesbians and Men: Men’s Experiences as Known and Anonymous Sperm Donors A 60-page manual which answers the questions men have, with first-person accounts by men and women “who have been there.” Resource & Referral Services ■ Information about events, counselors, groups, local, regional and national activities, and support programs for men. FALL 2005 • 27
Page 1 and 2: New Visions of Manhood Voice Male T
Page 3 and 4: Table of Contents Features Double P
Page 5 and 6: Men @ Work A Blog for the “Uncomm
Page 7 and 8: Ultimately, sexual violence can be
Page 9 and 10: tery charges. They ordered him to a
Page 11 and 12: citizens in identifying which strat
Page 13 and 14: Saying Yes to Nonviolence I am a ma
Page 15 and 16: lift his hand to the height of his
Page 17 and 18: Red Sox and Yankees Agree: Let's St
Page 19 and 20: For more info or to submit new entr
Page 21 and 22: Take Yourself in Hand! How to Do a
Page 23 and 24: me to be any more (or less) subserv
Page 25: Location: Detroit Marriott at the R

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