Autumn 2011 - Mandy Mazliah

Get Involved
Raising children
Our self-penned ceremony followed
the tried and tested format of a
service: a welcome and introduction,
some parental vows of care,
constancy and love, a statement by
the ‘god parents’ and then a formal
naming. We were reluctant to dictate
what our friends should commit to as
godparents. Instead we asked them
to select a poem, a piece of music or
a piece of art that would symbolise
the qualities they wanted to bring
to Thea’s upbringing. Their choices
of Lewis Carroll’s Jaberwocky,
and a poem by A.A. Milne suggest
imagination and humour are going to
be significant. Her other godmother
brought a beautiful display of
springtime flowers bursting into new
life.
We structured the ceremony with a
celebrant providing an introduction
to the day and linking the sections.
We recognised that although all
emotions expressed were authentic,
a ceremony is also a piece of
theatre. A celebrant provides an
effective stage management device
gently diffusing emotional tension
and maintaining pace. It also
prevents the ceremony becoming an
extended monologue by one or both
parents. Our preferred celebrant
was unavailable and we didn’t want
to involve a stranger on such an
intimate occasion. My younger sister
gamely agreed to take the role and
demonstrated that anyone with a bit
of confidence can fulfil the function.
The day was moving and
memorable. The joy of a naming
ceremony is the intensely
personalised nature of everything
that is said. It was taxing to squeeze
out prose which we hoped was
heartfelt but not hackneyed but
it was a labour of love which
enabled us to reflect on the kind of
parents we wanted to become. We
thoroughly enjoyed the experience
and would highly recommend a
naming ceremony as a way of
welcoming a baby to the world.’
Newsletter Winter 13