Beelzebubs-Tales-to-His-Grandson-by-G-I-Gurdjieff

to be taken not for just anybody, but for a real "gentleman" with an Englishupbringing.'As for the third form, this is required by whoever wishes to be able toprocure, here, there, everywhere, and at any hour—Scotch whisky. '"As the hours for the second form of learning the English language suitedme best, I decided to pay him immediately the dollars he charged for teachingthe secret of his system."When I had paid him the dollars and he had put them in an insidepocket—with a casual air, but in reality not without that avidity which hasbecome proper to all the beings of your planet—he explained to me that inorder to learn this second form, only five words had to be memorized, namely:1. maybe2. perhaps3. tomorrow4. oh, I see5. all right"He said that if I had occasion to converse with one or more of their'Misters,' I had only to utter any one of these five words every now and then.'That will be quite enough,' he added, 'to convince everybody that in thefirst place, you know the English language very well, and that second, you arean "old hand" at doing dollar business.'"Although the system of this highly esteemed Chatterlitz was very originaland no doubt effective, I never had occasion to put it into practice."And this was because the next day, by chance, I met in the street an oldacquaintance, a journalist of a newspaper from the continent of Europe, whoconfided to me an even better secret for learning the American language.