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or in a learning program and is close with a rabbi. A rabbi will also answer questions along the way, including halachic questions, for example, are there issues regarding yichud if a date ends at 10 pm? You may also need guidance as to issues on which you may compromise versus those that are non-negotiable. A rabbi provides spiritual guidance, and it is imperative that you rely on one during this process. Women however, may have a seminary teacher that they may use as a Rabbi in regards to seeking guidance, and such a person should be part of your support system. Having your parents support you during the dating process is crucial. They know you best and provide guidance as well as constant love and support. Having parents in your support group will help you answer certain questions, such as, “Is this the right person for me?” “How will she fit into my family?” In addition, married friends are important to include in your support group. They can speak to you about their dating experiences and tell you what you really need to hear from a friend. They have gone through the system and can answer certain philosophical and on the ground questions that you may have. Your married friends are also proof that the dating process can be successful and that you will find someone to marry. You may run into obstacles along the way and may want to give up, but your friends will show you that the value of the system. Lastly, you need your closest friends, whether single or married. They are accessible for everything, for 3
late nights when you need to chat, if the person you are dating decides to end it and you need a shoulder to cry on. Your friends are the people who help you through every step of the way, and to just sit and chat with you about your dates and about everything else in life. Having this support system will help you manage the dating system – it is a must. Before you even start dating, make certain that you have a support system in place for you every step of the way. C. Taking Care of Yourself It is always important for you to take care of yourself both physically and mentally. It is a mitzvah in the Torah to make sure that you are healthy and that you make healthy life choices. See the Rambam in hilchos deios. V’nishmartem me’od l’nafshoseichim. These include exercising or being physically active, watching what you eat, not consuming an excess of alcohol, and much more. Your body and your appearance has to be very important to you, and your appearance will make a difference when you are dating. Everyone looks different from one another, and people are attracted to all different types of looks. When desiring to date, it is important to put forth effort to look your best. It is similar to a job interview; you put your best foot forward to impress your possible employer. So, too, when it comes to dating, you should put your best foot forward. It is, of course, important to incorporate and maintain a healthy life style throughout your life. This 4
Page 2 and 3: I. Deciding You Are Ready to Date:
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Page 14 and 15: For a girl: On a girl’s first dat
Page 16 and 17: sit, you should consult with the gi
Page 18 and 19: he should borrow or rent a car. One
Page 20 and 21: D. Keeping Halacha During the datin
Page 22 and 23: C. Most Important Part of Your Deci
Page 24 and 25: to spend anywhere between $2,000 -
Page 26 and 27: Spending Plan: PROJECTED MONTHLY IN

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