The Saints' Everlasting Rest - Richard Baxter

and having chosen death, I deserve to suffer it. The prize was held out before
me if I had run well, I might have obtained it if I had striven, I might have
had the victory if I had fought valiantly, I had been crowned." It will yet
more torment them to remember that their obtaining the crown was not only
possible, but very probable. It will wound them to think, "I had once the
gales of the Spirit ready to have assisted me. I was proposing to be another
man, to have cleaved to Christ, and forsake the world. I was almost resolved
to have been wholly for God. I was once even turning from my base
seducing lusts. I had cast off my old companions, and was associating with
the godly. Yet I turned back, lost my hold, and broke my promises. I was
almost persuaded to be a real Christian, yet I conquered those persuasions.
What workings were in my heart when a faithful minister pressed home the
truth! O how fair was I once for heaven! I almost had it, and yet I have lost
it. Had I followed on to seek the Lord, I had now been blessed among the
saints."
It will exceedingly torment them to remember their lost opportunities.
"How many weeks, and months, and years did I lose, which if I had
improved, I might now have been happy! Wretch that I was! could I find no
time to study the work for which I had all my time? no time, among all my
labors, to labor for eternity? Had I time to eat, and drink, and sleep, and none
to save my soul? Had I time for mirth and vain discourse, and none for
prayer? Could I take time to secure the world, and none to try my title to
heaven? O precious time! I had once enough, and now I must have no more.
I had once so much I knew not what to do with it; and now it is gone, and
cannot be recalled. O that I had but one of those years to live over again!
how speedily would I repent! How earnestly would I pray! how diligently
would I hear! how closely would I examine my state! how strictly would I
live! But it is now too late, alas! too late."
It will add to their calamity to remember how often they were persuaded
to return. "Fain would the minister have had me escape these torments. With
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