Baby Talk May2019

Life & Style
Mother’s Day Special
Parent-child connection - aim to
make it stronger
We’re constantly reminded by parenting experts that we need
a minimum of five positive interactions to every negative
interaction to keep a healthy and thriving parent-child bond.
Alright, that might seem a bit much for some. To many
parents, it may seem like a difficult feat, since many among
us spend so much time guiding (read: correcting, reminding
and reprimanding them) - So, it’s going to take some effort
to put in five times as much in positive interactions, such
as hugs, praises, kisses, cuddles, playful teasing, joking,
encouragement, etc.
Feeling connected emotionally to our kids, and feeling their
connection towards us are what makes parenting worth
the effort we put in. Children who feel strongly connected
to their parents are often more inclined to cooperate with
them, not because they have to, but because they want
to. We’ll have to keep reminding ourselves though, that
they’re still kids, which means that emotions may still be a
tad overwhelming for them to handle responsibly, especially
during such trying times of parent-child feuds and conflicts.
As long as they trust that we understand them the most, and
are always on their side, they’ll always be more open to let us
lead the way.
….And with such young minds and lives, that’s what we
want. To be able to tenderly lead them towards independence
via the route of kindness, empathy and social skillfulness.
how it must be for a child who knows no other way to
respond to feelings of frustration, anger, sadness, ect, other
than to act out and hope you’ll find some way to help him.
So, summon up all your compassion, don’t let the anger
trigger you, and welcome the tears and fears that always
hide behind the anger. Be grateful too, that you’re there for
him - to help him acknowledge all those feelings and to show
concern for the pain. That creates safety, so he can move
through those emotions and back into the momentarily ‘lost’
connection with you. Afterwards, your growing, developing
child will surely start to feel more relaxed, cooperative, and
closer to you. No one said it was easy, mama!
You’ll need to listen and
empathise, a lot!
Cultivating the habit of seeing things from your child’s
perspective will ensure that you treat your little one with
respect no matter what the situation might be and offer
amiable solutions. It will help you better understand the
reasons behind such a behavior that is driving you nuts.
Keep putting yourself in their shoes and you will soon be
regulating your own emotions - the next time your patience is
challenged, you’ll quickly remember that your child is not an
enemy, but a little human trying to grow up.
Let’s see what some Malaysian moms have to say about
the subject!
Don’t turn away an emotional
outburst
Most of us tend to confuse emotional meltdowns as ‘bad’
behaviour. At times like these, it’s good to keep in mind your
own reactions when something upsets you greatly - not such
a fun feeling, isn’t it? And that’s you as an adult, so imagine
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