World Traveller June 2019

NAMIBIA
here are many things in
Namibia that can kill you,'
announces the welcome
video cheerfully, as a lion, a
Cape cobra and a scorpion
flash across the screen.
'But the biggest killer,' chirps
the narrator, 'is speed.' Cue a montage of
wrecked rental vehicles - identical, but for
the broken glass and torn steel, to those
in the car rental depot. The backpackers
who've spent the safety briefing scrolling
on their phones go pale. A German
lady hisses at her husband: 'You told
me Namibia was safe.' But despite this
sobering introduction, Namibia really
is Africa's safest, most effortlessly
explorable nation. Self-driving in Namibia
makes it easy to be intrepid. Part road
trip, part safari, it's two bucket-list trips
for the price of one. It's affordable, too,
with flight-inclusive self-drives much
cheaper than in South Africa. And, at
the wheel of a 4WD, the driving is epic.
It's for these reasons that so many
excited visitors fly in to Windhoek, ready
to depart on the famed tourist trail
they call Route One. It heads southwest
to the dunes of the Sossusvlei, then
loops north for the adrenaline sports
and Baltic-style seaside charms of
Swakopmund. From here, it's a six-hour
drive further north to reach the wildlife
of Etosha National Park. But Namibia is
fifth on the list of the world's emptiest
countries (with just three people per
square kilometre), so it doesn't require
many tourists to feel crowded.
Two decades ago, I wandered the
Sossusvlei like a lonely ghost in a Dalí
landscape. These days, such solace
is impossible. There's a car park full
of coaches, overland trucks, and that
backpacking couple. Instagrammers
queue at the Deadvlei for a photograph
with the skeletal camel thorns. There'll
be huge Chinese tour groups enjoying
Kaffee und Kuchen on Swakopmund's
prom and, as you watch lions drinking at
Etosha's Okondeka waterhole, you might
hear that German lady whisper 'Ist es
sicher?!' ('Is it safe?!') To experience the
cinematic desolation and spectacular
wildlife that Namibia is famous for, you
need to leave the herd. But it's not as
daunting as it sounds. All you need is
the ability to read a map, an awareness
of your limitations in what can be a
merciless land, and the desire to find
places so wild, so lonely and so alien,
they'll make you breathless. Scared,
even. Just as Namibia is supposed to.
So, back to the safety video. Which you
definitely need to watch. After which
you’re shown around a brutish Toyota
4WD. There's the sat nav, the sand jack
for digging yourself out of trouble, the
tyre deflator, the spare jerry cans, the
spade, the axe, the fire extinguisher,
the worryingly comprehensive firstaid
kit and a tracking device that
can monitor your speed: 120kph on
tarmac roads and 80kph on gravel,
where most accidents occur. Exceed
that and your insurance is void.
Then there's the optional rooftop
tent. I've never taken one because
deep down I know there'll be a night
when I'll forget I'm sleeping 2.5
metres off the ground, leave the tent
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