12_BT_December2019

Baby & Toddler
Special Feature
If you think you may be an
uninvolved parent, address the
situation now.
Here are some points for you to ponder, to help you turn it
around for your child and for you:
nnYour child needs you and you must make some quality
time for him or her, like you make time for work.
nnWorking parents should never try and justify the lack of
attention and time given to their kids due to being busy
at work.
nnAlways make it a point to listen to your kids before
you begin speaking, no matter what the situation is at
hand. In this regard, they should never feel like you’re
their enemy just because they have done wrong, but
rather, you’re a friend who is going to help them be a
better person.
nnWhen a child is distressed, even a hug can be of great
help. Remember, children need love and warmth.
nnUse mealtimes to try and address miscommunication,
disconnections, etc. A hearty meal and tender
conversations help a lot when times are rough between
parent and child.
nnIt takes effort in communication, but it’s important that
your child feel that he or she can trust you. Then only
will they want to share their troubles with you, allowing
you to guide them to the proper path.
nnDuring those times when you are truly too busy to see
to an issue, give your child a reason, for he deserves to
know why. Explain the situation and assure them that
you will be available for him as soon as you possibly
can. And make sure you keep your word!
nnAs a parent, you have to have to keep a sense of balance
between being strict as well as friendly with your child.
Once you realise that you’ve been an uninvolved parent,
resist living in the past, for that doesn’t help your situation.
Instead, work on changing the future. The best way to
start turning things around for your child is by getting
involved with his or her life. This means listening to them,
spending time with them, learning their needs and being
responsive to them.
Even if you’ve been uninvolved in their life for a long
time, every little step you make now to remedy it matters
to make a marked difference in their life and in their
happiness too. If the situation calls for it, apologising for
the past and expressing your desire to make things better
might be a very good step to take. Other steps you can
take is to read parenting books and online articles, and go
for counselling if necessary.
In conclusion
If you were or are being raised by an uninvolved parent,
you may have already experienced some of the negative
effects of this parenting style. Recognizing that uninvolved
parenting may have impacted your behavior and success
in life can be hard, but it's the first step in making positive
changes for yourself and potentially your family. The
important thing is to try not to hold a grudge and blame
your parents for everything. Instead, take control of the
situation for yourself.
Do you know someone who
is an uninvolved parent?
You may personally know an uninvolved parent
- either a friend or a relative. It can be a tough
situation, for it may make you worried for the
wellbeing of their child or children. If you know the
uninvolved parent personally, having a conversation
with them might be one way to go about it. Keep
in mind though that people tend to get defensive
when other people judge their parenting style, so
this is a situation where you'll probably have to
tread lightly and carefully. Be tactful and kind while
broaching the issue.
Will you change if you realise
you’re an uninvolved parent?
It’s evident by now that uninvolved parenting can have
a severe, long-term negative impact on children, which
include delinquency, risky behavior, difficulty with social
interactions, and depression. If you feel you fit into the
category of an uninvolved parent, the first thing you’ll
need to do is to acknowledge it. Only then can you decide
on what you can do about it.
When intervention may
be needed
In some severe cases, it adds up to child neglect,
which is a form of child abuse. In cases like these,
intervention may be needed, either to reduce some
of these risks if it's still early enough or help children
heal and encourage a better family dynamic.
BabyTalk | December 2019 41