Frank Get The Door! by Janey Godley sampler
Since lockdown began, people have woken up to Janey Godley’s comedy by the hundreds of thousands… [She] has provided much-needed relief throughout the coronavirus pandemic with her gallus Glesga interpretations which have been shared around the country with much glee. – Daily Record ‘Ye’ve been TELT. Everybuddy’s gonnae die if yeez aw keep gaun aboot an meetin each other an gaun hame wi a virus oan ye. So Ah’ve telt ye wance an Ah’m no gonnae tell ye again. This is the official line. If Ah see any o you oot there, Ah’m gonnae take a run an pit ma toe up the crack o yer arse. SO QUIT IT! Stey in the hoose, wash yer hands an keep yer family safe.’
Since lockdown began, people have woken up to Janey Godley’s comedy by the hundreds of thousands… [She] has provided much-needed relief throughout the coronavirus pandemic with her gallus Glesga interpretations which have been shared around the country with much glee. – Daily Record
‘Ye’ve been TELT. Everybuddy’s gonnae die if yeez aw keep gaun aboot an meetin each other an gaun hame wi a virus oan ye. So Ah’ve telt ye wance an Ah’m no gonnae tell ye again. This is the official line. If Ah see any o you oot there, Ah’m gonnae take a run an pit ma toe up the crack o yer arse. SO QUIT IT! Stey in the hoose, wash yer hands an keep yer family safe.’
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Christmas hasn’t been cancelled 38<br />
Nicola and Trump and the bleach 41<br />
Face masks 43<br />
Shave my legs time 46<br />
David Icke says Nicola is too dim 49<br />
Nicola says TITS 50<br />
R number 52<br />
I won’t do what Boris wants 54<br />
Nicola and the paddling pool 57<br />
Stay alert? Naw 60<br />
Like a divorce 63<br />
No, sunbathing is not an exercise 64<br />
My haircut and golf 66<br />
Mass gatherings 69<br />
Hula hooping 71<br />
Golf and fishing 74<br />
I don’t have a national Munchausen <strong>by</strong> proxy 77<br />
Rumpy pumpy 79<br />
Cummings and goings 81<br />
Test and Protect 83<br />
I’ve seen <strong>The</strong> Sound of Music 85<br />
6
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