CREATIV+NOV+DEC+2020

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“First.”
What does that word really mean in a
relationship? Does it mean your needs come
before your partner’s? Does it mean you consider
what’s important to you and what’s important to
your partner comes second? I have the answer
Yes. to that.
While this may confuse some people currently in a relationship,
or may not even surprise some who are entering a new
relationship, it’s the absolute truth. Whether you’re looking for
a relationship or you’re in one, it’s crucial to know that your
needs and what’s important to you always come first. It doesn’t
mean you become a self-centered, egotistical partner in your
relationship, but rather a self-aware individual who must ensure
that they’re their best selves so they can be great for the person
their spending most of their time with.
Being in a healthy relationship requires you to know what you
want out of it and how it can nurture your growth. It’s also
accommodating some of you are so you can co-exist with your
current or potential partner.
When you consider the things that make you feel happy, sad,
worried, or safe, and you learn to accept it, it makes you a better
individual-- especially for someone else. Putting yourself first
doesn’t come easy when you’re a giving, kind and “do-it-all”
type of person. You have to be deliberate in putting yourself
first so you don’t find yourself prioritizing someone else’s wants
and needs. This is not to say you can’t be compassionate and
thoughtful, but you must be sure that your partner is not basking
in your attentive nature while you receive subpar treatment or
aren’t having your needs met.
While you phase into a new relationship, or if you’re trying to
make your current relationship flourish, make you a priority.
Consider your feelings and how it portrays who you are on the
outside. Factor in the things you’re looking for in a partnership
and make sure those needs can be met. In addition, make sure
your potential honey or current boo takes on this same attitude.
Challenge him/her to put themselves first so each of you can
be a great exhibition of who you really are.
Toni Douglas
Now, consider the word “first” again. Does it
take on a fresh meaning? Does it make you
want to alter the outlook on where you stand
in a relationship? Hopefully, you can believe
in YOU again, (or continue to), and take into
account how your special prioritizing works
best for the relationship you’ll encounter.
www.creativmag.com | Nov - Dec 2020 | CREATIV | 81