9781250209153

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“God, you have a heinous sense of humor,” I tell her while our friendscrack up.“But here’s the bigger news,” Irene says, leaning into me. “She saideven if I can’t get a cheer scholarship to Benson, that we can still worksomething out. I can help in the office this summer while her receptionist ison a cruise to Majorca. I’m going to Benson no matter what.”“Irene, that’s amazing!” Honey-Belle squeals.“So I’m dropping out of SAOY,” Irene continues with a shrug. “I don’tneed it anymore. I don’t care. Besides, I want Danielle to win.” She looksseriously at her. “I need you to beat Charlotte.”Danielle stands at attention. “It would be my honor.”The day Danielle wins Student Athlete of the Year is the Friday before myeighteenth birthday weekend. Our principal announces her win during aspecial ceremony in the gym, with Danielle, Charlotte, and the remainingtwo candidates seated behind him. No one is surprised to hear Danielle’sname called, but nearly all of us are surprised when Charlotte throws herchair off the stage in a fit of rage. Even her friend Symphony can’t calm herdown. In the end, Mrs. Scuttlebaum has to bodily drag her to the nurse’soffice. That’s how we find out that Scuttlebaum used to be a professionalrodeo cowgirl.Danielle’s SAOY victory isn’t as ground-shaking as her buzzer-beateragainst Candlehawk, but everyone is still thrilled for her. Kevin gives her adozen red roses. Honey-Belle makes her a flower crown. Gunther secretlycuts off the Fighting Reindeer’s tail for Danielle to save as a keepsake.All in all, the end of that school day is pretty anticlimactic. We’re happy,but it’s a comfortable kind of happy. Tonight, the six of us are havingbirthday dinner with my family, and then we’re going to the Munny for atriple date to see Sixteen Candles. Irene has already made us promise todebrief about the problematic parts afterward. I don’t think I’ve ever seenKevin and Danielle so excited. They literally made notecards so theywouldn’t forget any of their discussion points. Danielle says they made outin his car first, then took turns trading highlighters. They’re disgusting.
It’s a beautiful March day when we break free of the senior locker halland wind our way to the parking lot. Irene hasn’t joined us yet; she toldHoney-Belle she had to email the Benson cheerleading coach first. It’sweird to hear college names dropped into every conversation now. Irenetalks about Benson all day long. Kevin has already gotten into Morehouse.Gunther has his sights set on Kennesaw State, and Danielle got intoVanderbilt. I’m still planning on Georgia State; I can picture myself downin the city. The only one of us who doesn’t mention college much is Honey-Belle, but that’s because she wants to take a gap year. She’s thinking aboutbecoming a doula. Gunther had to look that one up when she told him aboutit.We’re strolling lazily toward the parking lot, Danielle and Kevinholding hands, Gunther and Honey-Belle wrapping their arms over eachother’s shoulders. It’s not the group I would have expected to finish out mysenior year with. It’s better.The early spring weather is gentle and calm. Golden sun on our hair,birds chirping timidly. The marquee has read PROM NEXT MONTH all week,but someone messed with it so it now reads PROM SEX MONTH.There’s a steady beat of music coming from the parking lot. We turn thecorner and head to our cars, and suddenly the music is blaring. A thumpingdrumbeat. A lone figure standing by my Jetta—It’s Irene, hoisting an old-school boom box above her head, wearing atrench coat over her cheer uniform. So much cuter than John Cusack. Ilaugh with my whole heart, because what else can I do?My friends don’t look surprised: They hang back and watch meapproach her.Irene grins, bites her lip. She dials the volume down and sets the boombox on the roof of my car. That’s when I realize she’s not even playing theright song. It’s not “In Your Eyes.” It’s the Fine Young Cannibals song welistened to during our first week carpooling together.I grin and press into her. “Why the song change?”She rolls her eyes. “Because the other one is so fucking cheesy. ‘SheDrives Me Crazy’ is much more our vibe.”“Where did you even get this boom box?”
Page 3 and 4:
Begin ReadingTable of ContentsAbout
Page 5 and 6:
For Mom, who always bounces back, a
Page 7 and 8:
Tally Gibson was the first and only
Page 9 and 10:
keep up, but she rolls easily off D
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Outside, in the senior parking lot,
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seen you that pissed off before. I
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shoulder and stalks toward the park
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2It takes a moment for my senses to
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own phone.My mom shows up fifteen m
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“Mom, don’t—” Irene tries.
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“What’s the damage?” Dad asks
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“Do we have to?”Dad tilts his h
Page 27 and 28:
“Remember when she didn’t speak
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3The next morning, I pull into Iren
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She snorts. “Right. You only impl
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then she and my sisters queued up a
Page 35 and 36:
I wince, all thought of Danielle’
Page 37 and 38:
fish my notebook out of my backpack
Page 39 and 40:
The whole team looks at me, their m
Page 41 and 42:
Still, that afternoon, before the e
Page 43 and 44:
This time, when the cheerleaders sh
Page 45 and 46:
Now she glares at me. “Would you
Page 47 and 48:
I open my mouth to say something, b
Page 49 and 50:
on her. But the truth is, I was afr
Page 51 and 52:
“Ding-dong, the witch is dead,”
Page 53 and 54:
“So?”“So that’s all she eve
Page 55 and 56:
sidelines. The cheerleaders break o
Page 57 and 58:
hands, but she takes a practiced si
Page 59 and 60:
“You’re picky as hell,” Honey
Page 61 and 62:
Kevin drives us since he’s the on
Page 63 and 64:
Irene narrows her eyes. “And why
Page 65 and 66:
She purses her lips. “For how lon
Page 67 and 68:
Thora snorts. “With her? She hit
Page 69 and 70:
anything when I came out. Just try
Page 71 and 72:
Candlehawk boyfriend to turn our wa
Page 73 and 74:
acknowledge her sexuality (“You g
Page 75 and 76:
Me: Yeah, so?Only a small, distant
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“She thinks it’s a dead end,”
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“Buck, don’t say ‘shit’ in
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“Why didn’t you keep them movin
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we’ve ever drawn—maybe the only
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“Yeah, I know, I’m just conside
Page 87 and 88:
Just when I’m about to deliver th
Page 89 and 90:
It’s the first time she’s said
Page 91 and 92:
“Scottie, we’ve been meaning to
Page 93 and 94:
I shake my head. This girl never ce
Page 95 and 96:
“No. I’m trying to point out th
Page 97 and 98:
Tally looks stricken. She tries to
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Charlotte, he pops a video onto the
Page 101 and 102:
Irene snorts derisively. She falls
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squat in the center. It’s one of
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Honey-Belle stares meaningfully at
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Prescott. The Candlehawk boyfriend.
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Sometime later, I find myself stand
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Freaking weirdo. I wash my face and
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is Dirty Dancing. She plays that so
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again?” the queer soccer goalie s
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I shake my head in the darkness, bu
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When we pull into her driveway, she
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“I’m renaming our lunch special
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me up in a hug, and everyone scream
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But it’s not enough for Honey-Bel
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“You played great tonight,” she
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13Holiday break begins with a rains
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“That was … whatever,” I say,
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When Mass ends, I’m eager to leav
Page 135 and 136:
a sacred tradition for them? Has sh
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She hands me a perfectly wrapped bo
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Her eyes flicker in the glow of the
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“Here, you little brat,” Thora
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Her eyes bug out the slightest bit.
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I can’t remember the last time I
Page 147 and 148: “You played really great in the C
Page 149 and 150: would be too hard to switch schools
Page 151 and 152: 15The party is at some hip, boxy mo
Page 153 and 154: She stares at me, unamused. “I ca
Page 155 and 156: I have a sudden, strange sensation
Page 157 and 158: “Go run outside,” Danielle says
Page 159 and 160: “Why were you there in the first
Page 161 and 162: “Is everything okay?” Mom asks
Page 163 and 164: By the time I stop sobbing, I’m s
Page 165 and 166: Mom smooths my hair back from my fo
Page 167 and 168: I point at Danielle. “That’s wh
Page 169 and 170: “Good memory,” she says flatly.
Page 171 and 172: “Yes.” She smiles sadly. “Loo
Page 173 and 174: 17I never anticipated how mundane t
Page 175 and 176: sprinting down the field, their lun
Page 177 and 178: SAOY?”“Yeah, I am.” Her eyes
Page 179 and 180: “Darius Hart … Michael Lottke
Page 181 and 182: Which, go figure, is the exact thin
Page 183 and 184: The next day, I seek out Charlotte
Page 185 and 186: 18I find Honey-Belle before school
Page 187 and 188: The woman’s eyebrows jump. “Her
Page 189 and 190: The championship game dawns on a co
Page 191 and 192: And then the buzzer blares. It’s
Page 193 and 194: The stands go haywire. People are l
Page 195 and 196: An idea strikes me. “Hey … what
Page 197: 19Life settles into a calmer pace o
Page 201 and 202: ACKNOWLEDGMENTSI had so much fun wr
Page 203 and 204: bottom of my heart.
Page 205 and 206: ABOUT THE AUTHORKelly Quindlen is t
Page 207 and 208: Copyright © 2021 by Kelly Quindlen
Page 209: About the AuthorCopyright
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