9780008390662

the news
Sometimes when Julia and I go for walks, I’ll brake at a corner (corners are
the best for fresh news), and she’ll tug and say, C’mon, Bob, there’s nothing
there.
Oh, but there is.
Here’s the thing about poop and pee. I get that humans are not into them. I
see the bathroom doors shut tight. The embarrassed, downcast gazes.
You guys are totally missing out. There’s a whole lot of info hiding in your
average pee mail. When dogs want to share the latest gossip, we just wait
until nature calls. You’d be amazed what we can learn during a quick
bathroom break.
People read the news. Check the TV. Browse the web.
I linger over a fire hydrant and inhale the whole wide world.
My ears, by the way, are almost as remarkable as my nose. I pick up on all
kinds of things humans can’t hear.
What we do with our noses and our ears is kinda like taking a big ol’ knot
and loosening it up. Separating out the strands. Unbraiding things.
People smell a reeking pile of trash in a Dumpster. We smell a dollop of
cream cheese, a hint of peanut butter, a smattering of Froot Loops.
People hear the roar of a crowd in a stadium. We hear a strain of whiny fouryear-old,
a whisper of worried superfan, a note of grumpy hot dog vendor.
Man, dogs are cool.