Selwyn Times: February 01, 2023
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Wednesday <strong>February</strong> 1 <strong>2023</strong> <strong>Selwyn</strong> <strong>Times</strong><br />
Latest Canterbury news at starnews.co.nz<br />
NEWS 11<br />
couple ‘a Romeo and Juliet story’<br />
“He didn’t want her stressing<br />
out, didn’t want her doing too<br />
much. He did all the cooking,<br />
he babied her, and he really took<br />
care of mum a lot, above and<br />
beyond.<br />
“He adored her, she was his<br />
soulmate.”<br />
Bill Feary would often email<br />
him with updates about his<br />
mother’s health. The last email<br />
was to inform him she had<br />
pneumonia.<br />
Feary got a call from his mum<br />
in March 2<strong>01</strong>9 asking him to<br />
come home as she missed him<br />
and wanted to see him. He did<br />
so, spending a few weeks with<br />
the couple, and he said aside<br />
from the health issues the couple<br />
appeared to be fine.<br />
“Dad was still goofy as ever.”<br />
Feary’s last conversation<br />
with his parents – who had<br />
10 grandchildren and nine<br />
great-grandchildren – was just a<br />
“normal phone call”, he recalls.<br />
“Mum and Dad were just<br />
joking around.”<br />
He was supposed to call them<br />
the following weekend but<br />
forgot. The next day he was on<br />
the phone with the policeman<br />
who was telling him about his<br />
parents’ deaths.<br />
“It was such a shock; I just<br />
went numb.”<br />
After consoling his wife and<br />
children, he booked flights and<br />
HOME: The Christchurch house where Bill and Jill Feary<br />
died in a suspected murder-suicide.<br />
PHOTO: ANNA LEASK/NZ HERALD<br />
was in Christchurch within two<br />
days.<br />
Immediately after touching<br />
down, he went to identify his<br />
parents at Christchurch Hospital<br />
before going to their home.<br />
“The police were brilliant. I<br />
got there and it was like nothing<br />
had happened; they repaired the<br />
house.”<br />
In the bedroom Feary would<br />
stay in when he visited was a<br />
large bag on the bed. Inside<br />
was his children’s favourite<br />
chocolate, jet plane lollies for<br />
him, socks for his wife, and<br />
photos of his children. He is<br />
convinced his mum left it all for<br />
him shortly before she died.<br />
“I know Mum knew what<br />
was going on. Dad wouldn’t<br />
have done that, that was Mum<br />
through and through.”<br />
A will was also left in the<br />
living room.<br />
Feary spent about a month<br />
in Christchurch, dealing with<br />
police and lawyers and sorting<br />
the family home.<br />
“I didn’t really have time to<br />
grieve. My whole time there<br />
was just dealing with what had<br />
happened.”<br />
He credits Victim Support<br />
staff for helping him come to<br />
terms with his parents’ death<br />
while he was in the country.<br />
Three years on, Feary, now<br />
54, is still coming to terms<br />
with what happened. A private<br />
person, he does not like<br />
speaking about it too often<br />
and tries to stay busy, but<br />
admits there are times when<br />
the emotions just come to him,<br />
seemingly out of nowhere.<br />
“I miss them every day. I<br />
will be driving to work in my<br />
van and it’ll just hit me again.<br />
Sometimes I have a tear and a<br />
wee bit of a cry and I’ll be like<br />
why? Just out of the blue. It’s one<br />
of those things,” he says.<br />
“I’m just grateful that I’ve got<br />
great kids and my wife has been<br />
nothing but supportive.”<br />
Asked how he feels towards<br />
his father, he says he loves him<br />
and holds no ill will for what<br />
happened.<br />
“Dad was pretty healthy and<br />
he just would not want to live<br />
without Mum. I don’t know<br />
many men that would’ve gone<br />
through what he went through<br />
and completely stick behind<br />
Mum 100 per cent in the way he<br />
took care of her.<br />
“They loved each other so<br />
much.”<br />
There are still some<br />
unanswered questions for Feary,<br />
which he hopes a coroner’s<br />
report will one day solve.<br />
But the most important<br />
question, that still haunts him, is<br />
about his mum.<br />
“I want to make sure my mum<br />
never suffered and that she was<br />
at peace.<br />
“It would be closure because I<br />
keep thinking about it.”<br />
– NZ Herald<br />
• Chef appeals over farm<br />
worker murder page 13<br />
Where to get help:<br />
• Lifeline: 0800 543 354<br />
(available 24/7)<br />
• Suicide Crisis<br />
Helpline: 0508 828<br />
865 (0508 TAUTOKO)<br />
(available 24/7)<br />
• Youth services: (06)<br />
3555 906<br />
• Youthline: 0800 376<br />
633<br />
• Kidsline: 0800 543<br />
754 (available 24/7)<br />
• Whatsup: 0800 942<br />
8787 (1pm to 11pm)<br />
• Depression helpline:<br />
0800 111 757 (available<br />
24/7)<br />
• Rainbow Youth: (09)<br />
376 4155• Helpline: 1737<br />
If it is an emergency<br />
and you feel like you or<br />
someone else is at risk,<br />
call 111.<br />
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