november-2011

AMALFI COAST, ITALY
most famous road in the country,
I was the most Italian person this
side of Berlusconi. Of course, it
couldn’t last. I took off my shirt,
thus regrettably exposing myself
immediately as an Irish tourist in a
hire car. But hey, it was 30 degrees!
The Amalfi Coast road has more
twists than Rapunzel’s plaits. And
with Giulia’s lack of power steering
or brakes it was taking my full
concentration and strength to keep
us on that road. Although driving
the Amalfi Coast regularly features
on lists of the best things to do
before you die, I discovered that
you can either look at the scenery,
or you can drive. You can’t do both.
50 Thomas Cook Travel
Well, you can, but only if you want
driving the Amalfi coast to be the
final thing you do before you die,
rather than one of the things you
do before you die.
It is a monumentally stupid
place for a road or a construction
of any kind. The men who first
settled a 50km stretch of sheer
rock sliding into the sea set new
standards of belligerence. The road
is quite literally carved out of the
jagged mountainside, and snakes
along halfway up betwixt sea and
sky. There are few places to stop,
more bends than a David Beckham
free-kick session, and to be quite
honest it’s not the most relaxing of
Left: an icy Italian treat. She wears swimsuit from Sumarie.
Above and opposite: the beach at Positano.
journeys. Giulia didn’t like it, and
at one stage farted in protest as
I gave her too much gas with the
clutch still engaged.
Positano is a special place, and
one of the highlights of the Amalfi
Coast. Like all of the towns along
the famous stretch of coastline it’s
well below the road and almost
completely devoid of parking
spaces, so my advice is to drive the
road and tick that box, and then
return by boat to visit the town
properly. Above the beach, sloping,
narrow streets are festooned with
the colour of flowers and art,
and scented by cooking. Visitors
walk round like Scooby Doo,