Dean Amory - techniques for coaching

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Title: Techniques for Personal Coaching and Self Coaching Compiled by: Dean Amory Dean_Amory@hotmail.com Publisher: Edgard Adriaens, Belgium eddyadriaens@yahoo.com ISBN: 978-1-4716-6888-3 © Copyright 2011, Edgard Adriaens, Belgium, - All Rights Reserved. This book has been compiled based on the contents of trainings, information found in other books and using the internet. It contains a number of articles and coaching models indicated by TM or © or containing a reference to the original author. Whenever you cite such an article or use a coaching model in a commercial situation, please credit the source or check with the IP -owner. If you are aware of a copyright ownership that I have not identified or credited, please contact me at: eddyadriaens@yahoo.com The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches, but to reveal to him his own. – Benjamin Disrael 312
Cover picture: Sam & Jeffrey Adriaens - Fuenzalida 313
Page 2 and 3: 310
Page 6 and 7: TABLE OF CONTENTS 1 INTRODUCTION...
Page 8 and 9: Techniques for Personal Coaching an
Page 10 and 11: techniques: encouraging, paraphrasi
Page 12 and 13: situation. By repeating coachees’
Page 14 and 15: Good introductions for reflecting a
Page 16 and 17: - Is there something you would like
Page 18 and 19: Understanding, empathy and deep emp
Page 20 and 21: - insincerity - repetition - clich
Page 22 and 23: 3.2 ASKING QUESTIONS Asking questio
Page 24 and 25: Exploring possible goals E.g.: Coac
Page 26: Open questions: Obvious line to tak
Page 29 and 30: Bloom’s taxonomy Difficult questi
Page 31 and 32: 6. Evaluation-questions: Asking for
Page 33 and 34: If you really do not know what to a
Page 35 and 36: The coach wants the coachee to deve
Page 37 and 38: Identifying obstacles If some pers
Page 39 and 40: What do you expect if you do nothin
Page 41 and 42: Question #8: Who Am I becoming? How
Page 43 and 44: Now is the perfect time to do some
Page 45 and 46: Answer the following questions and
Page 47 and 48: If you commit time and energy to so
Page 49 and 50: decision is also a decision which c
Page 51 and 52: motivated you to take action and fo
Page 53 and 54: FACIILITATIVE INTERVENTIONS 4 Catha
Page 55 and 56:
5. Is it possible that there is ano
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Issues with Feedback Although super
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listener. A better sequence of stat
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with the group” is different than
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Remember that feedback is based on
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Definition The reframing matrix is
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elow shows how one might figure out
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essence, evaluation units are placi
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The Reframing Matrix A Reframing Ma
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Sources: Asian Development Bank- Me
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ME: (reality check) I haven’t hea
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Notice how these questions acknowle
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In this scenario your coachee will
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whether they might leave, and to as
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with the problem or, in some cases,
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1. Be curious. Ask a lot of questio
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personal experience that is like th
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If you get this wrong you will find
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Sources: Increasing levels of rappo
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A-to-Z strategies for building coll
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I. Focus on INNOVATION. Creativity
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want to create a networked organiza
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Practical collaboration building 'I
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* Celebrate and advertise success.
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should be rare. * Stick to your mis
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each other's values, knowledge, and
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understand. Avoid acronyms. (Common
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accountability. Let Go, Forgive. *
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One last piece of information for t
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1. You want to help. You are a kind
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ideas are absolutely great, but I c
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Now, do you know how to say NO? Of
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I’d love to help but I have a lot
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3.13 I-MESSAGES You can make a huge
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6. What do you feel like doing when
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a. We should avoid doing for others
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«And after considering all the pos
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and the creativity that comes from
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deep trust in the process of coachi
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they experience as a result will le
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personal experience with you.” Be
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Creative Thinking Tips Break out o
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It was by taking a different view o
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Innovation is not something that I
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management tools, some of which are
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iggest payoff. Sometimes this means
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Visualise success seen from the vie
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How to Be More Creative ? Having th
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These four steps are described in m
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Incubation is needed to handle comp
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"Coaching the Artist Within", "Fear
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Important! Edward de Bono Dr. Edwar
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Twyla Tharp, one of America's great
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28. Arrive earlier to the office th
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97. Make drawings of your ideas. 98
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4. Draw your goal. Grab some crayon
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Learn to notice patterns. "The geni
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innovative solutions to problems. C
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How many of us are waiting for some
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Step 3. Start combining the variabl
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492
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from having to keep the tank full,
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SAMPLE EXAMPLE: Problem Opportunity
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498
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3.17 SUMMARIZE, EVALUATE AND WRAP U
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STEP THREE: Check the other persons
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Now that you have completed level o
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A possible end of a session could g
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accomplish. Evaluating effectivenes
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Sources: Wendy Buckingham: http://w
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How Imagery Works Research has show
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To refocus. During practice and com
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http://www.usaswimming.org/ViewMisc
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Tips and Techniques Listed below ar
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individual as a group and the group
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For example if Bob is speaking to h
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RUMBA (realistic, utilitarian, meas
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3.19 THE MIRACLE QUESTION The mirac
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would ask the client to think of ot
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Sources: Wikipedia.org (http://en.w
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it doesn't matter to them if the pr
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3.21 SELF DISCLOSURE Coachees often
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This is the Gestalt notion of ‘di
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hunch that keeps running through yo
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intervention with the data I had ob
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3.22 USING INTUITION This is a thou
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the coachee's feeling or experience
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problem-solving, creativity and inn
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I partner with intelligent, success
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teachings refl ects similar phases,
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physical changes such as menstruati
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8. A TIME FOR WISDOM • A tranquil
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The word 'psychosocial' is Erikson'
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Erikson's psychosocial crisis stage
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meaning and purpose, life achieveme
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challenge which a person must negot
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He continued (in rather complicated
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It is not necessary therefore to un
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and conditioning from the previous
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Erikson later preferred for stages
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The difficulty in 'labeling' the fi
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1. Trust v Mistrust 'To get' 'To gi
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young children doing things for the
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5. Identity v Role Confusion 'To be
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8. Integrity v Despair 'To be, thro
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are effectively rebuilding wreckage
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4. Industry v Inferiority 5. Identi
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8. Integrity v Despair Wisdom & Ren
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young adult / lovers, friends, work
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maladaptations and malignancies Mal
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unrealistic, spoilt, deluded reckle
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Here are the main examples of alter
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The better that people come through
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3.24 THE DRAMA TRIANGLE The Drama T
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Mary: Well, little Johnny fell and
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The Empowerment Dynamic From Wikipe
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upon the aid of others. This is a f
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3.25 VOICE DIALOGUE Ever feel a bat
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Just knowing that the voices are re
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3.26 CONFRONTATION Confrontation do
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A coachee has become a coachee beca
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The Art of Constructive Confrontati
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Confrontation’s Bad Reputation Ca
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DiSilvestro and Hoover’s construc
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greatest opportunity for personal a
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weekly, monthly, and quarterly asse
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facilitated the team member’s gro
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3.27 PROVOCATION solution-focused c
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16. Total disagreement If that is t
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10. Apply to Self: How could you se
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capable of awareness and attention.
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The Benefits of Mindfulness Practis
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deflate the story and cultivates wi
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4. SHOWER. I actually use this one
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3.30 HUMOR Apparently laughter is t
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The thing with humor, like with all
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5. Be on time. Another way to demon
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Yes, it is contradictory! How can y
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Friends, join me in the celebration
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An endorsement is much more fun to
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Sources: Onelife Coaching - http://
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Signs of giving full attention to a
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3.34 TRUST Coaching and relationshi
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There are four basic feelings: Ang
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Respect usually leads to liking, an
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other person will continue to be ni
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Steven Covey, The 7 Habits of Highl
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positively. If you can accept your
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Nonetheless it is useful for coache
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appraisal-focused (adaptive cogniti
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one should communicate with people
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- noting however that "behind all a
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In Aggression, also known as the "M
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However, the "tend-and-befriend" re
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How to use the self-rating Diagnost
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5. How do you see your world? * how
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Capture any immediate thoughts that
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If they wish, they may use their se
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How to Make a Personal Development
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meeting up with someone often, near
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2.1 How does your current situation
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Step 3 - Generating options You now
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If you weren’t afraid at all, if
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Go ahead, pick your three actions f
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for a year (giving you over 150 lif
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Weekly Accountability Whether you a
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does add a bright spot to their day
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Things I accomplished since my last
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What habits, activities, or thought
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3. Completing a Coaching Series At
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3.40 JOINING THE COACHEE THROUGH MA
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move to the second phase of the the
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3.41 PARADOXICAL INTERVENTIONS “D
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3.42 EMPTY CHAIR TECHNIQUE This is
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3.43 THE HUNGER ILLUSION No, this i
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top dollar to use it, you can try i
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3.44.1 VALIDATION COACHING Validati
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3.44.2 VALIDIATION Validation is a
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Validation Defined Simply put, vali
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Imagine that the listening friend,
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When the listener restricts her com
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Validating Feelings about You One o
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3.45 CHALLENGE EXISTING PATTERNS To
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To be able to let go of ingrained p
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3.46 SOLUTIONS AND SUCCESSES TO DAT
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prophecy. Over time, he reframed th
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performance or negative consequence
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Here's how self-talk works. Pete Sa
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contributed to Fernandez's gaining
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If a person who has a long history
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I will never be able to do this. I
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is power in waking suggestion… su
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META COMMUNICATION When you want to
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Meanwhile, discover their values an
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Only after you have created suffici
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Telling the listener what they know
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6. Tell Stories with embedded comma
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spotted this pure strip of land, hi
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9. USE PRESUPPOSITIONS Presuppositi
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having to say. Confident that they
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how they really feel. “Yes” is
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scenes you see in your mind. You ca
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In the case of competitive sports,
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Ways In Which to Use Visualization
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Studies in mental imagery have show
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hear and feel those great feelings.
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index of arousal - and can be emplo
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Add the movement or kinesthetic fee
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MENTAL IMAGERY INTRODUCTION Welcome
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* * * * * * * * Look at the column
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that you imagine hearing when looki
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2-CLEANING THE SUBCONSCIOUS Right n
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The first step is to relax. Consequ
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Listening to a song inspires memori
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experiences. Rather than pulling yo
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On the contrary, these techniques a
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had experienced, the success image
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anchoring), as though you were pres
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Closing your eyes, say them in watc
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think that by limiting your ambitio
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For the future, try to make one exe
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12-The creative process Some people
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Real life example: There is everywh
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that their feet are webbed. This vi
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Creativity is expected to explode a
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This map shows a research for disco
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You can take notice that the proces
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DO IT YOURSELF: We do not expect th
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Borrowed Genius Step Two Now invite
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About Win Wenger This exercise come
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Mmm. Sounds good. It's not the kind
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Challenging is not meant to be a co
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5. Gentle Suggestion If you are stu
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3.53 MODELING - COACHING - SCAFFOLD
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Counterexample critical aspects and
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NLP Modeling involves transferring
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learning everything they can by fol
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Basic Problem Definition Step 1 Ste
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o Problem articulation and framing:
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Source: Leading With Questions How
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4. Always Review Positively If we a
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3.56 HEAD ON COLLISION A client has
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and defeating therapy: Now the view
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complex, elegant, aged-to-perfectio
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3.58 PRIMAL THERAPY Cool comes in m
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3.59 FOCUSING When a coachee decide
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