Dean Amory - techniques for coaching

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3.4 RESPONSIVENESS Responsiveness is defined as: “Readily reacting to suggestions, influences, appeals, or efforts” Being responsive means acting quickly, reacting to requests, suggestions, influences, appeals, or efforts. It means being able to adjust quickly to a change in situation, environment, or direction. Though not a perfect antonym, I would say that the antithesis of responsiveness is procrastination, which is the downfall of many businesses, careers, and lives. (Jeff Wilson) Responsive life coaches will gradually develop an approach and an orientation that is most relevant and useful to both them and their coachees. (www.associationforcoaching.com) Responsive questions enable the coach to gather more information and to help the coachee discover their gifts and talents - and finds ways to bring those out. A life coach needs to be intuitive and responsive when guiding a coachee to see the value in their own unique gifts. (Patti Stafford) Some examples of responsive questions are: 1. If it were possible to satisfy and alleviate your specific concerns, would you be interested in discussing this in more detail? 2. (I can certainly appreciate how you feel.) May I ask why you feel that way? 3. What are the top three benefits you would want to realize if you were to …? 4. What do you need to see in order to feel confident that you've made the best decision? 362
5. Is it possible that there is another approach/solution here? 6. What else do you think may be possible? 7. I'm not sure what you mean by that. Can you say more? 8. That's interesting. Will you share with me why you see it that way? 9. What solution would motivate you enough to explore in which way you should work to realize it? 10. If a coachee says, "I’m not ready for this now. “ respond with: "May I ask, what might be changing in the near furture that would then make it a better time to try this solution?" This question enables you to smoke out the real objection, just in case "we're not ready now" is not it. Moreover, you may uncover some additional information you can use that will allow you to adjust your approach. From The Complete Idiot's Guide to Cold Calling © 2004 Keith Rosen - CPW-014-009062 Visit Keith Rosen's Website: http://www.profitbuilders.com 363
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Page 4 and 5: Title: Techniques for Personal Coac
Page 6 and 7: TABLE OF CONTENTS 1 INTRODUCTION...
Page 8 and 9: Techniques for Personal Coaching an
Page 10 and 11: techniques: encouraging, paraphrasi
Page 12 and 13: situation. By repeating coachees’
Page 14 and 15: Good introductions for reflecting a
Page 16 and 17: - Is there something you would like
Page 18 and 19: Understanding, empathy and deep emp
Page 20 and 21: - insincerity - repetition - clich
Page 22 and 23: 3.2 ASKING QUESTIONS Asking questio
Page 24 and 25: Exploring possible goals E.g.: Coac
Page 26: Open questions: Obvious line to tak
Page 29 and 30: Bloom’s taxonomy Difficult questi
Page 31 and 32: 6. Evaluation-questions: Asking for
Page 33 and 34: If you really do not know what to a
Page 35 and 36: The coach wants the coachee to deve
Page 37 and 38: Identifying obstacles If some pers
Page 39 and 40: What do you expect if you do nothin
Page 41 and 42: Question #8: Who Am I becoming? How
Page 43 and 44: Now is the perfect time to do some
Page 45 and 46: Answer the following questions and
Page 47 and 48: If you commit time and energy to so
Page 49 and 50: decision is also a decision which c
Page 51 and 52: motivated you to take action and fo
Page 53: FACIILITATIVE INTERVENTIONS 4 Catha
Page 57 and 58: Issues with Feedback Although super
Page 59 and 60: listener. A better sequence of stat
Page 61 and 62: with the group” is different than
Page 63 and 64: Remember that feedback is based on
Page 65 and 66: Definition The reframing matrix is
Page 67 and 68: elow shows how one might figure out
Page 69 and 70: essence, evaluation units are placi
Page 71 and 72: The Reframing Matrix A Reframing Ma
Page 73 and 74: Sources: Asian Development Bank- Me
Page 75 and 76: ME: (reality check) I haven’t hea
Page 77 and 78: Notice how these questions acknowle
Page 79 and 80: In this scenario your coachee will
Page 81 and 82: whether they might leave, and to as
Page 83 and 84: with the problem or, in some cases,
Page 85 and 86: 1. Be curious. Ask a lot of questio
Page 87 and 88: personal experience that is like th
Page 89 and 90: If you get this wrong you will find
Page 91 and 92: Sources: Increasing levels of rappo
Page 93 and 94: A-to-Z strategies for building coll
Page 95 and 96: I. Focus on INNOVATION. Creativity
Page 97 and 98: want to create a networked organiza
Page 99 and 100: Practical collaboration building 'I
Page 101 and 102: * Celebrate and advertise success.
Page 103 and 104: should be rare. * Stick to your mis
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each other's values, knowledge, and
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understand. Avoid acronyms. (Common
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accountability. Let Go, Forgive. *
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One last piece of information for t
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1. You want to help. You are a kind
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ideas are absolutely great, but I c
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Now, do you know how to say NO? Of
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I’d love to help but I have a lot
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3.13 I-MESSAGES You can make a huge
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6. What do you feel like doing when
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a. We should avoid doing for others
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«And after considering all the pos
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and the creativity that comes from
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deep trust in the process of coachi
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they experience as a result will le
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personal experience with you.” Be
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Creative Thinking Tips Break out o
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It was by taking a different view o
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Innovation is not something that I
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management tools, some of which are
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iggest payoff. Sometimes this means
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Visualise success seen from the vie
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How to Be More Creative ? Having th
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These four steps are described in m
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Incubation is needed to handle comp
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"Coaching the Artist Within", "Fear
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Important! Edward de Bono Dr. Edwar
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Twyla Tharp, one of America's great
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28. Arrive earlier to the office th
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97. Make drawings of your ideas. 98
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4. Draw your goal. Grab some crayon
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Learn to notice patterns. "The geni
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innovative solutions to problems. C
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How many of us are waiting for some
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Step 3. Start combining the variabl
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492
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from having to keep the tank full,
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SAMPLE EXAMPLE: Problem Opportunity
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498
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3.17 SUMMARIZE, EVALUATE AND WRAP U
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STEP THREE: Check the other persons
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Now that you have completed level o
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A possible end of a session could g
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accomplish. Evaluating effectivenes
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Sources: Wendy Buckingham: http://w
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How Imagery Works Research has show
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To refocus. During practice and com
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http://www.usaswimming.org/ViewMisc
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Tips and Techniques Listed below ar
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individual as a group and the group
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For example if Bob is speaking to h
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RUMBA (realistic, utilitarian, meas
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3.19 THE MIRACLE QUESTION The mirac
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would ask the client to think of ot
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Sources: Wikipedia.org (http://en.w
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it doesn't matter to them if the pr
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3.21 SELF DISCLOSURE Coachees often
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This is the Gestalt notion of ‘di
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hunch that keeps running through yo
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intervention with the data I had ob
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3.22 USING INTUITION This is a thou
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the coachee's feeling or experience
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problem-solving, creativity and inn
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I partner with intelligent, success
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teachings refl ects similar phases,
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physical changes such as menstruati
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8. A TIME FOR WISDOM • A tranquil
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The word 'psychosocial' is Erikson'
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Erikson's psychosocial crisis stage
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meaning and purpose, life achieveme
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challenge which a person must negot
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He continued (in rather complicated
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It is not necessary therefore to un
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and conditioning from the previous
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Erikson later preferred for stages
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The difficulty in 'labeling' the fi
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1. Trust v Mistrust 'To get' 'To gi
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young children doing things for the
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5. Identity v Role Confusion 'To be
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8. Integrity v Despair 'To be, thro
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are effectively rebuilding wreckage
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4. Industry v Inferiority 5. Identi
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8. Integrity v Despair Wisdom & Ren
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young adult / lovers, friends, work
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maladaptations and malignancies Mal
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unrealistic, spoilt, deluded reckle
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Here are the main examples of alter
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The better that people come through
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3.24 THE DRAMA TRIANGLE The Drama T
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Mary: Well, little Johnny fell and
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The Empowerment Dynamic From Wikipe
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upon the aid of others. This is a f
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3.25 VOICE DIALOGUE Ever feel a bat
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Just knowing that the voices are re
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3.26 CONFRONTATION Confrontation do
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A coachee has become a coachee beca
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The Art of Constructive Confrontati
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Confrontation’s Bad Reputation Ca
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DiSilvestro and Hoover’s construc
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greatest opportunity for personal a
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weekly, monthly, and quarterly asse
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facilitated the team member’s gro
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3.27 PROVOCATION solution-focused c
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16. Total disagreement If that is t
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10. Apply to Self: How could you se
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capable of awareness and attention.
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The Benefits of Mindfulness Practis
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deflate the story and cultivates wi
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4. SHOWER. I actually use this one
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3.30 HUMOR Apparently laughter is t
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The thing with humor, like with all
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5. Be on time. Another way to demon
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Yes, it is contradictory! How can y
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Friends, join me in the celebration
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An endorsement is much more fun to
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Sources: Onelife Coaching - http://
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Signs of giving full attention to a
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3.34 TRUST Coaching and relationshi
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There are four basic feelings: Ang
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Respect usually leads to liking, an
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other person will continue to be ni
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Steven Covey, The 7 Habits of Highl
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positively. If you can accept your
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Nonetheless it is useful for coache
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appraisal-focused (adaptive cogniti
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one should communicate with people
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- noting however that "behind all a
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In Aggression, also known as the "M
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However, the "tend-and-befriend" re
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How to use the self-rating Diagnost
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5. How do you see your world? * how
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Capture any immediate thoughts that
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If they wish, they may use their se
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How to Make a Personal Development
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meeting up with someone often, near
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2.1 How does your current situation
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Step 3 - Generating options You now
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If you weren’t afraid at all, if
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Go ahead, pick your three actions f
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for a year (giving you over 150 lif
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Weekly Accountability Whether you a
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does add a bright spot to their day
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Things I accomplished since my last
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What habits, activities, or thought
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3. Completing a Coaching Series At
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3.40 JOINING THE COACHEE THROUGH MA
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move to the second phase of the the
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3.41 PARADOXICAL INTERVENTIONS “D
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3.42 EMPTY CHAIR TECHNIQUE This is
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3.43 THE HUNGER ILLUSION No, this i
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top dollar to use it, you can try i
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3.44.1 VALIDATION COACHING Validati
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3.44.2 VALIDIATION Validation is a
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Validation Defined Simply put, vali
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Imagine that the listening friend,
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When the listener restricts her com
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Validating Feelings about You One o
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3.45 CHALLENGE EXISTING PATTERNS To
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To be able to let go of ingrained p
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3.46 SOLUTIONS AND SUCCESSES TO DAT
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prophecy. Over time, he reframed th
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performance or negative consequence
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Here's how self-talk works. Pete Sa
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contributed to Fernandez's gaining
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If a person who has a long history
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I will never be able to do this. I
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is power in waking suggestion… su
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META COMMUNICATION When you want to
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Meanwhile, discover their values an
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Only after you have created suffici
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Telling the listener what they know
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6. Tell Stories with embedded comma
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spotted this pure strip of land, hi
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9. USE PRESUPPOSITIONS Presuppositi
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having to say. Confident that they
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how they really feel. “Yes” is
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scenes you see in your mind. You ca
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In the case of competitive sports,
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Ways In Which to Use Visualization
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Studies in mental imagery have show
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hear and feel those great feelings.
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index of arousal - and can be emplo
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Add the movement or kinesthetic fee
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MENTAL IMAGERY INTRODUCTION Welcome
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* * * * * * * * Look at the column
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that you imagine hearing when looki
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2-CLEANING THE SUBCONSCIOUS Right n
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The first step is to relax. Consequ
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Listening to a song inspires memori
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experiences. Rather than pulling yo
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On the contrary, these techniques a
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had experienced, the success image
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anchoring), as though you were pres
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Closing your eyes, say them in watc
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think that by limiting your ambitio
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For the future, try to make one exe
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12-The creative process Some people
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Real life example: There is everywh
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that their feet are webbed. This vi
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Creativity is expected to explode a
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This map shows a research for disco
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You can take notice that the proces
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DO IT YOURSELF: We do not expect th
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Borrowed Genius Step Two Now invite
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About Win Wenger This exercise come
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Mmm. Sounds good. It's not the kind
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Challenging is not meant to be a co
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5. Gentle Suggestion If you are stu
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3.53 MODELING - COACHING - SCAFFOLD
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Counterexample critical aspects and
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NLP Modeling involves transferring
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learning everything they can by fol
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Basic Problem Definition Step 1 Ste
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o Problem articulation and framing:
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Source: Leading With Questions How
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4. Always Review Positively If we a
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3.56 HEAD ON COLLISION A client has
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and defeating therapy: Now the view
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complex, elegant, aged-to-perfectio
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3.58 PRIMAL THERAPY Cool comes in m
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3.59 FOCUSING When a coachee decide
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