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Scott Gruenbaum—Reflective Letter Dear Miami University Writing Teachers, I’ll admit outright that this portfolio presented me with something of a quandary. It called for a work of fiction, a persuasive essay, and a response to a text— a balanced mix, to be sure— but unfortunately, many of my favorite pieces did not exactly fit into those categories. Therefore, I was not able to include several works which best illustrate who I am and where I come from. You should count this a blessing. For some reason, most people I talk to do not truly appreciate a proper hamster-worship, cheesecake, and/or attack-squirrel essay. Those who don’t immediately shuffle slowly away usually end up making a few clever comments regarding medication. Anyway, after a careful consideration of the saner pieces that actually somewhat fit the specifications, I came up with... two out of the three. The persuasive essay was a piece of cake, so to speak. In my Junior year, I wrote an argumentative essay on the subject of animal testing. At the time I was totally opposed to any sort of testing. I will not go so far as to state that writing this essay radically changed my outlook on things, but over the course of my research, I did come to a new, perhaps more moderate, understanding. Some readers of this and my other argumentative essays may think that I have no real opinion, that I waver too much and don’t know what to think. Allow me to state for these people that this is for the most part inaccurate. There may be some issues (football scores, current fashions, etc.) that I don’t care about, but on most serious subjects, I try to take a moderate stance, as I have so often found whether when researching animal testing or the destruction of the rainforest that both sides have valid and important points, and any extremist view most often fails to solve anything. For me, the second most painful type of essay to write is a response to a text. The first most difficult to write, of course, would be poetry. For your own sake, be glad this is a prose portfolio (Douglas Adams fans, think Vogons...). Anyway, over the years I have written a great many responses, some bad, some good, all quite boring. I mean, its great when Shakespeare uses the “s” sound repeatedly to enhance his wave/ocean imagery, but writing a multi-page paper on that subject is not on my “Lifetime Goals” list. However, as you English teachers seem to like responses, I managed to scrounge up one on Hamlet that I personally feel is rather well done. I would expound more on this subject, but it’s making me drowsy. Now I had a problem. I’ve written a few short story-type pieces, but upon reexamination, I found that none of them would properly meet the requirement. One was way too long at 16 pages, one consisted entirely of inside jokes bashing the school’s marching band, and the third, the most promising, was a) still too long, and b) was a little too... weird. It was meant as a parody of The Crucible, but, as many of my things do, took on my personality: Applegale: The rutabaga! It... it says its going to eat me! (She falls to the floor and starts clucking like a chicken) The purple rutabaga is coming after me! Therefore, I was forced to write an original short story. After a few bad starts, I decided to try my hand at descriptive writing. I’ve always somewhat admired those authors who could talk so much that it seemed to take 10 pages for anything to happen. So, when I wrote my story, I 52
determined that I would have as little plot as possible, and concentrate mostly on the imagery. As I am something of a nature lover/ very minor tree hugger, I wrote about the woods. To give a brief synopsis: tree gets hit by lightning, falls down. And it took me three pages to say that! Heh heh.... Upon submitting this piece, I know it’s a risk. Half the people who read it liked it; half gave me the look and suggested a massive re-write. Frankly, I don’t care. I had fun writing it, and I personally like my descriptions, and that’s good enough for me. The two previous essays were written for an outside reader— a teacher, student, wonderful, kind, caring, vaguely god-like Miami portfolio grader, etc— but the final short story was written by me for me. Anyway, I’m about out of room for this letter, so I guess you’re all saved from one of my hamster stories... ‘tis a pity. Maybe if I ever meet you face to face I’ll recount the tale of the Great MO, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart Wilson G———- (my last name) Jr. II, Cutest Bouncing Bubbly Baby Boy Kong Child, Moldy Cheese, The Hamster Formerly Known As Cabbage. Or maybe not— especially if the medical authorities get to me first... Sincerely, Oops, can’t tell you my name, can I? 53
Page 1: Miami University Best of Portfolios
Page 4 and 5: Acknowledgements In 1990, Miami Uni
Page 6 and 7: The Best of Miami University’s Po
Page 8 and 9: All four of these reflective letter
Page 10 and 11: Your gurgling stomach now seems les
Page 12 and 13: one must prohibit the words from be
Page 14 and 15: And as the result of many enjoyably
Page 16 and 17: would remain viable in the new mill
Page 18 and 19: all of the qualities represented in
Page 20 and 21: honors for past dances, but I figur
Page 22 and 23: in this Mac (I pointed to the Power
Page 24 and 25: There was only one person in the wo
Page 26 and 27: over 500 men sleeping on the dirty
Page 28 and 29: An Explanatory, Exploratory, or Per
Page 30 and 31: decrease will not allow the schools
Page 38 and 39: to make a greater quantity of tires
Page 40 and 41: Response to a Text—Jessica Keel R
Page 42 and 43: the entire novel, but she remains b
Page 44 and 45: “my little squirrel” (2). Torva
Page 46 and 47: status. The Ranevskaya family is on
Page 48 and 49: A Response to a Text—Stephanie Wo
Page 50 and 51: life, showing her growth as a perso
Page 54 and 55: Scott Gruenbaum—A Narrative or Sh
Page 56 and 57: Scott Gruenbaum—An Explanatory, E
Page 58 and 59: another creature for survival is in
Page 60 and 61: Scott Gruenbaum—A Response to a T
Page 62 and 63: Complete Portfolio—Camilla Hilema
Page 64 and 65: Camilla Hileman—A Narrative or Sh
Page 66 and 67: Camilla Hileman—An Explanatory, E
Page 68 and 69: Camilla Hileman—A Response To A T
Page 70 and 71: Complete Portfolio—Pamela Spellma
Page 72 and 73: Pamela Spellman—A Narrative or Sh
Page 74 and 75: Pamela Spellman—An Explanatory, E
Page 76 and 77: Pamela Spellman—Response to a Tex
Page 78 and 79: 2001 Scoring Guide for Portfolios A
Page 80 and 81: Guidelines for Using Non-Sexist Lan
Page 82 and 83: Advice from Portfolio Scorers Each
Page 84 and 85: 5. Be creative: Don’t be afraid t
Page 86 and 87: What’s the difference between a
Page 88 and 89: 2002 Portfolio Information 88
Page 90 and 91: Essential Instructions Papers writt
Page 92 and 93: Supervising Teachers 2001 Kristen C
Page 94 and 95: Julie R. Hagerty Mount Notre Dame H
Page 96 and 97: Craig E. Potter Perry Meridian High

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