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fr uits of the WINTER RETREAT
On Almsround
by Phap Thanh
W
We went on almsround today. I walked slowly in meditation.
My mind focused on my steps, behind my elder brother. As I walked
people offered me food. I opened the lid and held out my alms bowl
to them.
photo by Emily Whittle
In the Buddha’s time, each day
monastics would walk into the
local town where they would be
offered food. During the winter
retreat at Deer Park, on two
occasions the monastics and
lay community gathered at local
parks, to honor this tradition.
As I walked on, in the corner of my eye I saw a little girl, about
three years old, in her mother’s arms. I realized that the little girl
wanted to offer something to me, so I stopped and looked at her. She
had an apple in her hands. She held it tightly. Her mother encouraged
her to put the apple into my open bowl. The little girl was hesitant;
there seemed to be a resistance in her. Very, very slowly she began to
lower the apple into my begging bowl. I stood quietly, observing this
wonderful and slow process. She lowered the apple a little further into
my bowl, but it seemed that she was not ready to let it go.
With more encouragement from her mother, she then released her
grip on the apple and it rolled into my bowl. I could sense the little
girl was ambivalent about letting go of something so wonderful and
precious as this apple. I offered her a smile and bowed a thank you.
I felt very grateful for having been the witness of that moment in
the little girl’s life. Maybe this was the first time she encountered the
painful feeling of giving something away that was precious to her and
at the same moment the joyous feeling of giving to benefit someone
else. When she finally dropped the apple, it seemed like a new experience
for her, like a relief.
I closed the lid of my bowl and walked on with slow steps. I felt
very happy to carry this apple in my bowl, because with it I carried the
little girl’s compassion. I carried the little girl’s experience of giving
away her own food to someone else, someone that she didn’t know.
Later on the whole Sangha sat down to eat together in silence. I
held the little girl’s apple in my hands and I still felt grateful for her
sacrifice, for the pain she was going through to release it. I felt, with an
apple given like this, many people could be fed. From this one apple,
thousands of hungry children could eat and satisfy their burning hunger.
I felt, with this generous attitude the little girl had shown towards me,
so many starving children in the world could be fed. I ate the apple
very slowly and tears ran down my cheeks.
Phap Thanh is from Germany and
currently lives in Plum Village.
the Mindfulness Bell 17