Download PDF - Chronicle Books

I went on a date with a Peruvian guy who said to me duringour tapas: “You eat like windmill.”The date went well until he mentioned his name is not reallySteven, nor was he 27, nor single.Q: Why don’t blind people skydive?A: It scares the hell out of their dogs.Q: Why are wedding dresses white?A: Aren’t all kitchen appliances?Crap DatesDisastrous Encounters from Single Life • By Rhodri MarsdenA good date can be exhilarating: a shared joke, an improbablespark, long moments of gazing fondly into each other’s eyes.Not so for the dating disasters featured in this collection oflaugh-out-loud actual tweets about the most terrible eveningsimaginable. From seriously unwelcome confessions, todousing dates in wine, to bringing them back to creepyapartments to meet favorite stuffed animals, here are thefunniest and most alarming reports from dating’s front lines.Along the way, author Rhodri Marsden offers tips on howto identify and avoid the worst of the bad daters, includingmarried men, blatant liars, deluded optimists, and more.This harrowing collection of real nightmare dates will amuseanyone who’s suffered through one of cupid’s off nights.Rhodri Marsden writes for the Independent newspaper and is aconnoisseur of crap dates. He lives in London.Classic Book of Rude JokesCrass Humor for the Discriminating Jokester • By Scott McNeelyFor jokesters who like their humor on the dark side, thisClassic Book of Rude Jokes compiles the most hilariouslycrass jokes out there in one compact volume. Scott McNeely,author of Ultimate Book of Jokes, has mined decades ofrude joke history in search of the best of the worst jokesthat were too shocking to include in his first collection.From dirty blonde jokes and tasteless religious jokes to thejust plain sick and twisted, no one escapes offense in thiscollection of gags that is sure to please even the crudestcomedian.Scott McNeely is the author of Ultimate Book of Jokes, UltimateBook of Card Games, and many other titles. He has written fornumerous magazines, websites, and travel guidebooks. He livesin Portland, Oregon.Crap Dates$9.95 USPB • 978-1-4521-1458-35 x 7 in, 124 pp, 2-color imagesRights: XUKCDating/Pop CulturePub Month: OctoberAlso available:F in Exams$9.95 PB978-0-8118-7831-9Classic Book of Rude Jokes$10.95 USHC • 978-1-4521-1698-34∑ x 6 in, 156 ppRights: WHumorPub Month: SeptemberAlso available:Ultimate Book of Jokes$18.95 HC978-0-8118-7795-4[P] 800 759 0190 / [F] 800 286 9471 / CHRONICLEBOOKS.COM 17