Mindfulness and Liberation True Love Global Sangha: - The ...

true LOVEBeginning AnewTo Begin Anew is to look deeply andhonestly at ourselves, our past actions,speech, and thoughts to create a freshbeginning within ourselves and in ourrelationships with others. At the practicecenter, we practice Beginning Anewas a community every two weeks andindividually as often as we like.We practice Beginning Anew to clear ourmind and keep our practice fresh. Whena difficulty arises in our relationships withfellow practitioners and one of us feelsresentment or hurt, we know it is time toBegin Anew. The following is a descriptionof the four-part process of BeginningAnew as used in a formal setting. Oneperson speaks at a time and is notinterrupted during his or her turn. The otherpractitioners practice deep listening andfollowing their breath.Flower watering: This is a chance toshare our appreciation for the other person.We should mention positive qualities thatwe have truly observed in him or her, orspecific instances when the other personsaid or did something we admired. This isan opportunity to shine light on the other’sstrengths and contributions to the Sanghaand to encourage the growth of his or herpositive qualities.Sharing regrets: We may mention anyunskillfulness in our actions, speech, orthoughts that we have not yet had anopportunity to apologize for.Expressing a hurt: We may share howwe felt hurt by an interaction with anotherpractitioner, due to his or her actions,speech, or thoughts. Expressing a hurt isoften performed one-on-one with anotherpractitioner rather than in the group setting.If desired, you may ask for a third party thatyou both trust and respect to be present.We must be sure to have completed thefirst step described above, watering theother person’s flowers, before expressinghow she or he has hurt us. When someoneexpresses to us that they have been hurt,we should not justify ourselves. We have tolisten deeply without thinking of how theyare wrong, and we breathe to keep ourcompassion alive. If they have manycontinued on page 25FindingHarmony inBeginningAnewBy Bethany KlugMMy husband David and I entered our relationship with a deep intention:that spiritual practice would form its foundation. We met atSangha and our friendship grew around the trellis of mindfulnesspractice. When we began entertaining the notion of a long-termcommitted relationship, I insisted we start with Beginning Anew. Ihad withheld some things about myself from my first husbanduntil years after we married. To some degree, the anger, hurt, andmistrust we felt led to the downfall of our marriage. So David andI told each other everything—things we didn’t ordinarily share outof fear of judgment, things we felt ashamed of, everything. And itworked. There have been no unpleasant surprises in our ten-plusyears together.We practice Beginning Anew once every two weeks, before werecite the Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings. The process is simple,but as Thay says, “it takes training.” We encourage the practiceof mindful speech and deep listening by bowing before and afterwe speak. We don’t interject, but breathe mindfully and placeour full attention on listening to our dear one. In fact, we have arule. We do not comment on anything said during our BeginningAnew ritual for forty-eight hours. The few times we have brokenthe forty-eight-hour rule, we have regretted it. We both need thespace to hear and be heard and look deeply into our feelings.This regular practice of Beginning Anew has helped us navigatethe path of happiness together. We know what brings eachother happiness, and we water those seeds often. The practice hastrained us to listen deeply to each other and to speak and act in aBethany Klug, the Practiceof True Emptiness, convenesthe Heartland Community ofMindful Living along with herhusband David,True Wonderful Lamp.They reside in KansasCity with their spiritualdirector, Shanti the Cat.24 Winter/Spring 2011