Obama or Romney? - St Paul's High School

Volume 66, Issue 2 October 31, 2012School NewsMr. Stadnyk’s Leaked Autobiography“My name is Danny Tanner, and I have the Problem”4Mr. StadnykTeacherNicknames are an interestingthing. Sometimes they providea great insight into someone’s pastand sometimes they are just random.The story of my first nicknameis an intricate look into theshady past of one’s childhoodwhich often manytry to forget but giddy-uphere we go.It all started as anew decade filled withhope began. That decadewas the 1990’s. In 1990Brian Mulroney was thePrime Minister, GeorgeH. W. Bush was President,Driving Miss Daisywon the Oscar for BestPicture, the Grammy forRecord of the Year wentto Bette Midler for “WindBeneath My Wings”, andof course the San Francisco49ers won Super BowlXXIV by defeating Denver55 to 10.In September of1990 I was starting gradethree at Royal School.Royal School is the elementaryschool in theSuburb Beautiful, or thatschool the grade elevenand twelve’s drive by to go to Mc-Donald’s, Subway, or Tim Horton’sat lunch.Grade three is when it allstarted. It was the simple days ofschool when almost everything wastaught by one teacher and in thesame classroom. Grade three hadthe simple comforts of having yourown desk where you kept all yourschool supplies inside. Miss Hillwas the grade three teacher who hada reputation of ensuring studentswere neat, tidy, and with everythingin order.Very quickly into the newschool year I learned that her reputationwas well deserved. Miss Hillwould pick up the desks of studentsand literally would hold the desk upand dump everything out if the deskwas too messy.Now simple gender prejudiceswill suggest that grade threegirls would probably not have theirdesks dumped while nine-year-oldboys would be messy and all havetheir desks dumped.Mr. Stadnyk in Grade 3.While these stereotypes almostplayed out as all of the desksof the boys were dumped expect forone boy. I was the only boy whohad his desk neat and tidy puregold enough to not get picked upand dumped out. For me it did notrequire any effort to keep my deskclean it just made sense. Everythinghas its own place so put it back in itsplace.That is when I was rightfullygiven my first nickname. As theschool year progressed and I veryquickly became the sole male survivorof the game of desk dumping,my peers affectionately referred tome as Danny Tanner.Danny Tanner was the fathercharacter on the hit television showFull House, which was an ABC sitcomthat lasted 8 seasons. DannyTanner was a single father who hadhis friend and brother-in-law moveinto his home to help raise Danny’sthree daughters. The family lived inSan Francisco, the home of the NFCfinalist 49ers. Danny was a morningnews host but that isnot where I earned mynew name.Danny was obsessedwith cleaning. Often duringthe show he wouldclean the house and evenclean his cleaning products.For Danny springcleaningwas his idea offun. Imagine someonewho actually likes toclean.Well as someonewho did not get his deskdumped I realized thatnot only did I like tohave a clean desk but Ialso liked cleaning andputting things back intotheir place. So the nicknameof Danny Tannerwas given and stuck forthe next three years untilI moved on to the hallsof Charleswood JuniorHigh.While attending awedding this past Novemberin B.C., a fellow studentfrom grade three asked me if I wasstill a neat freak. I had to admit thatI did make the hotel bed that morningto which he responded, “I ampretty sure they pay people to dothat for you. Oh Danny Tanner it isgood to see that some things do notchange.”When I reflect back on mygrade three experiences I realizethat many of my quirky tendenciestoday have been prevalent and deeprooted in me for whatever reasonContinuedPlease See Article entitledDanny Tanner on Page 6