Ministering to the Young Single Adult - Elmer Towns

2. The stereotyped image of the younger person. The church considers the youngsingle adult as impulsive, immature and unreliable. If a boy is going into the armedservices he is not ready for business or church responsibility, and if a girl is not marriedthere is some “lack.” But this stereotyped image is beginning to crumble, and the statusof the young single adult is being accepted in our society.3. The psychological barriers erected between the older generation and theyounger. The older generation tends to stand aloof from the needs, interests and desires ofthe young single adult. The older generation feels its responsibility for the youngerchildren, but this responsibility is ended when this person becomes an adult. The averageolder adult considers the young single adult as an “equal,” whereas, in actuality, olderadults should be ministering to children and young single adults, as well as themselves.4. Mistaken ideas about his desires. There is a tendency to think that all theyoung single adult wants is financial independence and freedom from responsibility,when in reality he wants a feeling of being useful, being loved and being wanted.Sometimes it is assumed that the loneliness he experiences results from his owncarelessness and desire for independence.5. An overemphasis on children and youth. Many churches have cultivated theattitude that education is for the “kids.” The young single adult is considered “fast,”“flighty” and “free.” Time spent on him is wasted, and as one deacon said, “You can’tbuild a mature congregation on these people.” However, every individual in our church isa person who has needs, and our ministry is “to communicate the gospel at the point ofneed.”6. The emphasis placed on marriage and the family. The average church programis oriented to the family. The family pew, the family picnic and family altar have longbeen emphasized by the church. Now many churches are calling their Wednesday nightBible study and prayer meeting “family night.” The emphasis on the family is needed,and nothing should be taken away from this emphasis. However, the young single adult islost in the shuffle and as a result is neglected.This neglect is a paradox. The unique problems, needs and contributions of theyoung single adult are neglected while the church tries to pressure him into its mold.Church members from the working world want him to join them. They want him tosucceed both at the church and in business life. For the most part the church is moreinterested in the young adult and his success in business life than in his own personalproblems. Business men in the church are glad to see him and will try to sell himinsurance, clothing and all kinds of luxuries. They will even extend credit to him-not,however, as much as if he were married.The average church member puts pressure on the young single adult to getmarried. This is a pressure of conformity. The church community wants him to be likethe majority of them, wants him to watch the same kind of television programs, go to thesame athletic events and the same parties. However, his unique problems and needs areneglected.