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Opinion 23<br />

We need to do something<br />

before the frustration festers<br />

To see the change that we want to see in Bangladesh, we need to facilitate it first<br />

DT<br />

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 28, <strong>2016</strong><br />

Change won’t occur from the comfort of one’s home<br />

If the irksome reiterated statement of children being the ‘future of the<br />

nation’ is something we can bank on, we need to create a system that<br />

allows them to be the ‘backbone of our country’<br />

• Luba Khalili<br />

If there’s one thing that<br />

Bangladesh does not lack in,<br />

it has got to be the amount of<br />

people pointing out what’s<br />

wrong with this country.<br />

Opinion sections of all<br />

newspapers, talk shows on local<br />

TV, casual banter between uncles,<br />

friends, the cha wala, what have<br />

you -- all conversations flock to the<br />

same topic of debate.<br />

This is wrong, that is wrong:<br />

The government, corruption,<br />

police, bribery, population, slums,<br />

NGOs, academics, reporters, the<br />

petty bourgeois, your neighbour.<br />

Add to the list our favorite<br />

nouns, and we have ourselves<br />

a fairly convincing -- and most<br />

likely justified -- debunking of<br />

development.<br />

Now, whether we are the way<br />

we are because we complain too<br />

much, or because of the structural<br />

violence we’ve endured from<br />

hundreds of years of colonisation<br />

and oppression of the masses in<br />

various forms, the concerns laid<br />

out aren’t all a pretense.<br />

In fact, most people are just too<br />

tired of being stuck in traffic for<br />

unnecessarily long hours, broken<br />

roads, unavailable and unfit public<br />

transits … the list goes on.<br />

And as much as I would like to<br />

harp on about how far we’ve come<br />

as a nation since independence<br />

-- which is another issue itself for<br />

possibly another day -- I can’t help<br />

but hop on the bandwagon of the<br />

pedantic, and point out the sad<br />

truth: The list keeps going on.<br />

So, if one were to think and<br />

play the blame game a little bit<br />

more, perhaps the folks who sit in<br />

the central secretariat in Ramna<br />

should be the ones to point our<br />

fingers at. I mean, if the one body<br />

of authority looming over this tiny<br />

country, squeezed in between<br />

a “frenemy,” responsible for<br />

carrying out the task of providing<br />

the basics to its (albeit deluged)<br />

population, can’t do a proper job --<br />

then maybe it’s time to change the<br />

BIGSTOCK<br />

constituents, and maybe even the<br />

framework of polity itself.<br />

Maybe it is time for the older<br />

generations to finally step off of<br />

their thrones and we can have a<br />

body of governance not falling<br />

asleep during national assemblies.<br />

But none of this blaming and<br />

shifting around the puzzle pieces<br />

actually point to a problem rooted<br />

deeper in the Bangladeshi society.<br />

If the younger generation<br />

were to step up onto a platform<br />

where change could be brought,<br />

we would need the means to do<br />

so, and of course, incentives,<br />

to toil away for a vision of what<br />

Bangladesh could actually be.<br />

And while that could very well<br />

be arranged, there’s another issue<br />

that keeps us away from moving<br />

up: We lack a culture of moving<br />

out.<br />

While most people are expected<br />

to live with their parents until,<br />

at least, they get married -- and<br />

for women, there’s a chance of<br />

moving out after marriage -- that<br />

doesn’t happen until they’re at<br />

least, say, 25 years old? From even<br />

a glance at Dhaka, people do not<br />

live on their own until they’re well<br />

into their 30s.<br />

This creates a culture of being<br />

tethered to familial comfort, and<br />

frankly, a sense of comfort that<br />

began from childhood and lasts<br />

that long could transform, rather<br />

subtly and sinisterly, into a lack of<br />

accountability. Towards ourselves,<br />

our careers, and, perhaps, to our<br />

nation. Most of us lose a good<br />

eight to 10 years of our adult<br />

lives not paying rent -- and thus<br />

not experiencing the struggle of<br />

making ends meet, not worrying<br />

about how we’ll eat and so on.<br />

Our realisation of responsibility<br />

doesn’t really hit until much later,<br />

and by that time, the vigour and<br />

drive that a twentysomething<br />

would have, fizzles out.<br />

Then it becomes about coming<br />

home from the nine-to-five job,<br />

taking care of the parents, maybe<br />

looking for a new apartment with<br />

the spouse and kids?<br />

I understand the privileged<br />

lenses that I’ve got on when<br />

making the claims that moving<br />

out of ones parents’ house is not<br />

a custom we traditionally have,<br />

and that people don’t struggle to<br />

make ends meet -- and the peers<br />

that I’ve seen come to the capital<br />

to study are examples of that. But<br />

if it is indeed the privilege that I<br />

am speaking of, that opportunity<br />

needs to be taken advantage of.<br />

And there are methods<br />

available to facilitate this madness.<br />

From allowing young people<br />

to be able to find part-time jobs<br />

so they can pay rent, to making<br />

apartments affordable and<br />

landlords approachable -- this list,<br />

too, goes on.<br />

But the first step is to really<br />

believe that change is possible.<br />

Let’s face it, if the irksome<br />

reiterated statement of children<br />

being “the future of the nation”<br />

is something we can bank on, we<br />

need to create a system that allows<br />

them to be “the backbone of our<br />

country.”<br />

Mollycoddling sons and<br />

assuming that daughters only<br />

belong in their father’s house and<br />

then the husband’s, are customs<br />

which are lethal for the changes<br />

that we would like to see in<br />

Bangladesh, whether in 10 years<br />

or 200. •<br />

Luba Khalili is a Sub-Editor at the Dhaka<br />

Tribune.

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