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Opinion 23<br />
We need to do something<br />
before the frustration festers<br />
To see the change that we want to see in Bangladesh, we need to facilitate it first<br />
DT<br />
WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 28, <strong>2016</strong><br />
Change won’t occur from the comfort of one’s home<br />
If the irksome reiterated statement of children being the ‘future of the<br />
nation’ is something we can bank on, we need to create a system that<br />
allows them to be the ‘backbone of our country’<br />
• Luba Khalili<br />
If there’s one thing that<br />
Bangladesh does not lack in,<br />
it has got to be the amount of<br />
people pointing out what’s<br />
wrong with this country.<br />
Opinion sections of all<br />
newspapers, talk shows on local<br />
TV, casual banter between uncles,<br />
friends, the cha wala, what have<br />
you -- all conversations flock to the<br />
same topic of debate.<br />
This is wrong, that is wrong:<br />
The government, corruption,<br />
police, bribery, population, slums,<br />
NGOs, academics, reporters, the<br />
petty bourgeois, your neighbour.<br />
Add to the list our favorite<br />
nouns, and we have ourselves<br />
a fairly convincing -- and most<br />
likely justified -- debunking of<br />
development.<br />
Now, whether we are the way<br />
we are because we complain too<br />
much, or because of the structural<br />
violence we’ve endured from<br />
hundreds of years of colonisation<br />
and oppression of the masses in<br />
various forms, the concerns laid<br />
out aren’t all a pretense.<br />
In fact, most people are just too<br />
tired of being stuck in traffic for<br />
unnecessarily long hours, broken<br />
roads, unavailable and unfit public<br />
transits … the list goes on.<br />
And as much as I would like to<br />
harp on about how far we’ve come<br />
as a nation since independence<br />
-- which is another issue itself for<br />
possibly another day -- I can’t help<br />
but hop on the bandwagon of the<br />
pedantic, and point out the sad<br />
truth: The list keeps going on.<br />
So, if one were to think and<br />
play the blame game a little bit<br />
more, perhaps the folks who sit in<br />
the central secretariat in Ramna<br />
should be the ones to point our<br />
fingers at. I mean, if the one body<br />
of authority looming over this tiny<br />
country, squeezed in between<br />
a “frenemy,” responsible for<br />
carrying out the task of providing<br />
the basics to its (albeit deluged)<br />
population, can’t do a proper job --<br />
then maybe it’s time to change the<br />
BIGSTOCK<br />
constituents, and maybe even the<br />
framework of polity itself.<br />
Maybe it is time for the older<br />
generations to finally step off of<br />
their thrones and we can have a<br />
body of governance not falling<br />
asleep during national assemblies.<br />
But none of this blaming and<br />
shifting around the puzzle pieces<br />
actually point to a problem rooted<br />
deeper in the Bangladeshi society.<br />
If the younger generation<br />
were to step up onto a platform<br />
where change could be brought,<br />
we would need the means to do<br />
so, and of course, incentives,<br />
to toil away for a vision of what<br />
Bangladesh could actually be.<br />
And while that could very well<br />
be arranged, there’s another issue<br />
that keeps us away from moving<br />
up: We lack a culture of moving<br />
out.<br />
While most people are expected<br />
to live with their parents until,<br />
at least, they get married -- and<br />
for women, there’s a chance of<br />
moving out after marriage -- that<br />
doesn’t happen until they’re at<br />
least, say, 25 years old? From even<br />
a glance at Dhaka, people do not<br />
live on their own until they’re well<br />
into their 30s.<br />
This creates a culture of being<br />
tethered to familial comfort, and<br />
frankly, a sense of comfort that<br />
began from childhood and lasts<br />
that long could transform, rather<br />
subtly and sinisterly, into a lack of<br />
accountability. Towards ourselves,<br />
our careers, and, perhaps, to our<br />
nation. Most of us lose a good<br />
eight to 10 years of our adult<br />
lives not paying rent -- and thus<br />
not experiencing the struggle of<br />
making ends meet, not worrying<br />
about how we’ll eat and so on.<br />
Our realisation of responsibility<br />
doesn’t really hit until much later,<br />
and by that time, the vigour and<br />
drive that a twentysomething<br />
would have, fizzles out.<br />
Then it becomes about coming<br />
home from the nine-to-five job,<br />
taking care of the parents, maybe<br />
looking for a new apartment with<br />
the spouse and kids?<br />
I understand the privileged<br />
lenses that I’ve got on when<br />
making the claims that moving<br />
out of ones parents’ house is not<br />
a custom we traditionally have,<br />
and that people don’t struggle to<br />
make ends meet -- and the peers<br />
that I’ve seen come to the capital<br />
to study are examples of that. But<br />
if it is indeed the privilege that I<br />
am speaking of, that opportunity<br />
needs to be taken advantage of.<br />
And there are methods<br />
available to facilitate this madness.<br />
From allowing young people<br />
to be able to find part-time jobs<br />
so they can pay rent, to making<br />
apartments affordable and<br />
landlords approachable -- this list,<br />
too, goes on.<br />
But the first step is to really<br />
believe that change is possible.<br />
Let’s face it, if the irksome<br />
reiterated statement of children<br />
being “the future of the nation”<br />
is something we can bank on, we<br />
need to create a system that allows<br />
them to be “the backbone of our<br />
country.”<br />
Mollycoddling sons and<br />
assuming that daughters only<br />
belong in their father’s house and<br />
then the husband’s, are customs<br />
which are lethal for the changes<br />
that we would like to see in<br />
Bangladesh, whether in 10 years<br />
or 200. •<br />
Luba Khalili is a Sub-Editor at the Dhaka<br />
Tribune.