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Australian_Yoga_Journal_July_2017

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The temple at Gomukh<br />

At Gomukh, there is a small stone<br />

temple nestled among mountain<br />

peaks that seem to protect the<br />

big ice cave from which the river flows.<br />

When I got there, I knelt before a<br />

statue of Lord Shiva, held my<br />

hands at my heart, and silently<br />

wished for clarity.<br />

Collecting water at<br />

Gomukh<br />

Elephant sanctuary in<br />

Dehradun<br />

Meditation caves at<br />

the ‘Beatles Ashram’<br />

Ma Ganga flowing<br />

through Rishikesh<br />

Young pilgram at<br />

Gangotri Temple<br />

thelastlegofthetrekwasconsiderably<br />

easierthanthegroundwe’dcovered<br />

thedaybefore,givingmymindthe<br />

chancetowander.Andthereinthe<br />

highHimalayas,aftersharingthe<br />

trailwithsadhusandchantingand<br />

meditatinginacavewithababa,<br />

mythoughtsreturnedagaintomy<br />

Irish-Catholicgrandmother.<br />

Whatwouldshehavethoughtof<br />

myIndianpilgrimage?Wouldshe<br />

havebalkedattheHindumythology,<br />

orurgedmetosayafewHailMarys<br />

atthesummit?<br />

AndwhatImostwantedtoknow:<br />

Whatinvisiblestirringshadmy<br />

grandmotherfacedasshewalked<br />

barefootupCroaghPatrick,andwere<br />

theysimilartomyownasImademy<br />

waytowardGomukh?<br />

Mygrandmotherdied1oyearsago,<br />

soI’llneverknowtheanswerstomy<br />

questions.ButIdoknowthatshortly<br />

aftershemadeherownpilgrimage,she<br />

leftherfamilyandallthatsheknewin<br />

hertinyvillageinIrelandandemigrated<br />

toNewYork.<br />

AtthetopofCroaghPatrick,there<br />

isalittlewhitechurchwherepilgrims<br />

saytheirprayersbeforeheadingback<br />

downthemountain.Iimaginedmy<br />

younggrandmotherwalkingintothat<br />

churchandlightingacandle,praying<br />

forstrengthasshepreparedtoleave<br />

herhomelandandaskingforblessings<br />

intheunknownfutureshe’dhavein<br />

America.<br />

AtGomukh,thereisasmallstone<br />

templenestledamongmountainpeaks<br />

thatseemtoprotectthebigicecave<br />

fromwhichtheriverflows.WhenIgot<br />

there,Islippedoffmyshoes,knelt<br />

beforeastatueofLordShiva,andheld<br />

myhandsatmyheart.ThenIwalked<br />

overtothebankofMaGangamere<br />

feetfromwhereshestartsflowingand<br />

bowed,silentlywishingforclarity<br />

andcomfortasImovedonfromthe<br />

heartacheandlessonsofmypastand<br />

towardmyownunknownfuture.The<br />

fewpeoplearoundmeseemedtobe<br />

justasreflectiveasIwas,baskinginthe<br />

peaceful,comfortingenergythat<br />

crystallised—botharoundandwithin<br />

us—hereatthesource.<br />

AsIcuppedmyhandsintheicy<br />

riveranddrankfromit,Iheldthe<br />

feelingsoflossandhopemy<br />

grandmothersurelyexperiencedasa<br />

youngwomanabouttoleaveIreland,<br />

aswellasmyownpasthurtand<br />

optimismforwhat’stocome.Andthen<br />

Iopenedmypalmsandletitallgo,<br />

watchingthecleardropletsmergewith<br />

theflow.This,Ithought,iswhypeople<br />

ofallfaithsgoonpilgrimages,andwhy<br />

Iwasonthisonenow.<br />

Thesejourneysarelikelifeitself,<br />

filledwithsetbacksandstrugglesas<br />

wellasvictoriesandbeauty,justasmy<br />

grandmotherhadtoldme.Andno<br />

matterwhatyoubelievein—awhole<br />

posseofHindugodslikethesadhusand<br />

babasworship,theholyTrinitylikemy<br />

grandmotherdid,ornohigherbeingat<br />

all—thejourneyservesasareminder<br />

thatwe’reallonourownpath,facing<br />

ourfears,feelingoursadness,and<br />

trustingintheunknowablegiftsofthe<br />

future.<br />

Want to go on a retreat in India or lead one for<br />

your students? Visit learningjourneys.com to<br />

find out how.<br />

PHOTOS: MEGHAN RABBITT

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