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Indiana Bulletin - February 2022

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<strong>February</strong>, March, April <strong>2022</strong> The <strong>Bulletin</strong> 21<br />

Drink Less, Live More<br />

Rachel Pritz, RN, MSN<br />

Certified Coach, Certified Enneagram Coach<br />

I was driving to my job as a<br />

nurse manager one day and I<br />

started day dreaming. What if<br />

I got into a car accident, just<br />

a small one of course, but<br />

one that would require other<br />

people to take care of me for a<br />

change. I pulled into work and<br />

woke up from my day dream<br />

in horror. This wasn’t normal<br />

and how did I even get to this<br />

place in life anyway? I was<br />

drinking a bottle of wine most<br />

nights to “get through life”<br />

and this had become problematic. As I got unstuck<br />

from over-drinking, I started talking to about it on<br />

stages and with the teams I coached. At first, it was<br />

vulnerable and scary. Then, people started coming to<br />

me and messaging me after saying “me too.” While<br />

there is comfort in knowing you aren’t alone, it was<br />

also a little frightening to know how many of us in<br />

healthcare were out there. It’s a lot and more than I’d<br />

ever imagined.<br />

What drew you to this read?<br />

I am lucky to have a very close friend that is also<br />

a practicing clinical psychologist. She recently shared<br />

insights and takeaways from the authors on her practice<br />

blog and mentioned them to me the last time she came to<br />

visit. I knew right away it was something I wanted to better<br />

understand and possibly share with nurses.<br />

This book is available on Audible which is a win for me<br />

so that I can multitask. I had a road trip planned and it<br />

was the perfect length to accompany me on my ride. You<br />

know it is going to be good if Brene Brown calls it a “total<br />

game changer.”<br />

The audio version comes with a printable PDF for<br />

working through stressful decisions (cost/benefit analysis)<br />

and additional supportive worksheets. I liked the idea<br />

of exercises in addition to the content so that I could<br />

hopefully apply the methodology to my own life events.<br />

What have you learned from this author?<br />

One of my key takeaways, early in my listening was that<br />

we are all on a journey. Wellness is not an end destination<br />

but is an ongoing process that requires attention and<br />

purposeful action. The authors focus on how to respond,<br />

moving fluidly, through life and the stress response cycle.<br />

Why, if so, do you recommend this book to other nurses?<br />

I recommend this book to nurses, really to any female.<br />

I do not recommend the book to readers that identify as<br />

male as it is written specifically for females, or individuals<br />

that identify as female. I appreciate that the authors clearly<br />

state this in the beginning. I think many of the actions<br />

and processes can be applied to males, however Nagoski<br />

and Nagoski take into consideration that male brains (or<br />

individuals that identify as) can function differently than<br />

females, hence some of these items may not come into<br />

play or be as useful.<br />

A favorite section includes the authors referring to<br />

our own “mad woman in the attic”, the importance of<br />

connecting with your inner voice, and how to build the<br />

relationship in our favor. If you have an inner voice that<br />

consumes you, this may be just the book for you.<br />

I recommend this book as we are all spread thin and<br />

overwhelmed. Stress and stressors are compounding and<br />

occurring non-stop, even more so today that last year and<br />

the year before. Nagoski and Nagoski guide the reader to<br />

move fluidly through stress and stressful circumstances<br />

by preventing us from being stuck in a negative state. We<br />

can process suffering if we know why we are responding<br />

in this way. Meaning is good for us. “People with greater<br />

sense of meaning and purpose in life experience better<br />

health and are more likely to access preventive health<br />

care services to protect that health… A meta-analysis of<br />

the relationship between purpose in life and health found<br />

It makes sense. You have a hard day, or night, at<br />

work and come home exhausted. You just want to<br />

turn off your brain and relax. A global pandemic and<br />

all that has come with it both professionally and<br />

personally, hasn’t made this easier. Not only do you<br />

have all the to-do’s and the emotional toll of being a<br />

healthcare professional, but you also have so many<br />

responsibilities outside of work. Kids, aging parents,<br />

family drama, relationship struggles, etc. We’ve<br />

normalized drinking as a way to cope with all the<br />

stressors that are thrown our way. But, what if you got<br />

curious about the deeper why behind the drinking?<br />

Is this behavior working for you or is it causing you<br />

harm? What are the emotions and thoughts behind the<br />

drinking?<br />

Healthcare professionals everywhere have been<br />

told to practice more self-care as the answer to their<br />

burnout and exhaustion. I remember being told this<br />

too. But what if society sold us a bag of lies about<br />

what self-care really is? It’s so much deeper than<br />

bubble baths and chardonnay. In fact, when I was<br />

swimming in chardonnay that was the exact opposite<br />

of self-care. Here are some of the strategies I used to<br />

help dig me out of the pit of despair. I call it radical<br />

self care. Nothing radical about it, but it does take<br />

time and daily intention. If you truly want to get to the<br />

ISNA’s Bookshelf<br />

Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle<br />

by Emily Nagoski, PhD and Amelia Nagoski, DMA<br />

that greater sense of purpose is<br />

associated with 17% lower risk<br />

of all-cause mortality.” (Nagoski<br />

& Nagoski, 2019, Chapter 3,<br />

08:19).<br />

This book is truthful, easy to<br />

read/listen to, and helpful as we<br />

process our current environment<br />

and everyday stress. The book<br />

barely mentions happiness, but<br />

realistically focuses on how to<br />

cultivate joy by working through<br />

your stress, because we all have<br />

it. Most importantly we all have<br />

the power to persevere.<br />

How will you apply what you have learned?<br />

• Nagoski and Nagoski have helped me put labels on<br />

and define stress. They have also shed light on how to<br />

separate stressors from my response to stress. This is<br />

foundational material in monitoring my stress cycles.<br />

• Thinking through the concept of stressors and<br />

response to stress as components of a cycle will<br />

help remind me to close the gap and to work through<br />

either or both cause and the outcome of stressors in<br />

which are in and out of my control.<br />

• A reminder to not be hard on myself while on this<br />

journey and to not use obtaining wellness as a check<br />

off or end game.<br />

• This was a great reminder that I am in control of how<br />

I let stress affect me. Stress is inevitable but how I<br />

manage it is in my control.<br />

• The authors reminded me that adversity or<br />

overcoming difficulties and stressful circumstances<br />

can help me define my own meaning in life, moving<br />

me through coping onto thriving. Post traumatic<br />

growth builds strength and supports handling<br />

additional difficulties that will come my way if I am<br />

completing my stress cycles.<br />

• We make our own meaning to life, which requires<br />

focus and intention. It’s what sustains us. Just like<br />

wellness, it is an ongoing journey.<br />

What is your next book or reading material in your queue?<br />

I’d like to hear or read more from Kristin Neff about<br />

Compassion. She has a Ted Talk that gets referenced<br />

frequently and authored two books, Self-Compassion: The<br />

Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, and Fierce Self-<br />

Compassion. I’ve also recently started Moral Resilience,<br />

written by Cynda Hylton Rushton, which I am enjoying and<br />

moving through quickly.<br />

Interested in sharing a recent book, podcast, article, or<br />

show? Email me katie@indiananurses.org<br />

root cause of any harmful numbing behavior, here are<br />

some ways to do it:<br />

• Therapy/Coaches<br />

• Podcasts/Audiobooks<br />

• Self-awareness work (I used the Enneagram)<br />

• Exercise<br />

• Healthy eating<br />

• Spirituality<br />

• Meditation (I use a guided version)<br />

• Deep connections with other humans<br />

• Belonging, not just fitting in<br />

• Healthy boundaries<br />

• Understanding thoughts and emotions and making<br />

space to process them<br />

• Asking for (and at times hiring) help<br />

Ultimately, I decided to stop blaming everyone else<br />

around me and to take accountability for the life I’d<br />

created. No one was stopping me from doing all of the<br />

above, but me. Not my work, my boss, my partner, my<br />

kids, my parents. No one else was responsible but me.<br />

My favorite definition of self-care is creating a life you<br />

don’t have to regularly escape from. Think about what you<br />

are escaping and where you might need help. This is a<br />

personal journey and my guidance might not match what<br />

you need. But the good news here is you already know<br />

what you need if you can just quiet the noise around you.<br />

Here’s what I’ve learned after going from drinking a<br />

bottle of wine per night, to only drinking when I really<br />

want to, which is rare.<br />

• I sleep better - yes, alcohol can get you to sleep,<br />

but you don’t get quality sleep.<br />

• I have much less anxiety. Hangxiety is a real (and<br />

chemical thing).<br />

• My mood is better.<br />

• Alcohol numbed the more negatively perceived<br />

emotions. But it also numbed all the good stuff.<br />

• Alcohol added no value in my life.<br />

• I’ve lost weight. Calories aren’t the only biological<br />

reason for this.<br />

• Shaming yourself doesn’t work. Self-love does.<br />

I thought my journey out of over-drinking would<br />

only impact my drinking. Turns out, this healing and<br />

empowering journey fixed a whole lot of problems in<br />

my life. When we get to the root cause, that’s when the<br />

magic happens.<br />

Rachel Pritz, RN, MSN<br />

www.rachelpritz.com<br />

Instagram: @indyenneagram<br />

Facebook: Rachel Pritz Life Coaching<br />

LinkedIn: Rachel Pritz<br />

Disclaimer: If you believe you are an addict or<br />

alcoholic I encourage you to seek help.

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