Island Parent Magazine Dec-Jan 2023

Healthy Families, Happy Families
Child, Youth
& Family
Public Health
South Island Health Units
Esquimalt 250-519-5311
Gulf Islands 250-539-3099
(toll-free number for office in Saanichton)
Peninsula 250-544-2400
Saanich 250-519-5100
Saltspring Island 250-538-4880
Sooke 250-519-3487
Victoria 250-388-2200
West Shore 250-519-3490
Central Island Health Units
Duncan 250-709-3050
Ladysmith 250-755-3342
Lake Cowichan 250-749-6878
Nanaimo 250-755-3342
Nanaimo 250-739-5845
Princess Royal
Parksville/Qualicum 250-947-8242
Port Alberni 250-731-1315
Tofino 250-725-4020
North Island Health Units
Campbell River 250-850-2110
Courtenay 250-331-8520
Kyuquot Health Ctr 250-332-5289
‘Namgis Health Ctr 250-974-5522
Port Hardy 250-902-6071
islandhealth.ca/our-locations/
health-unit-locations
PARENTING
Nobody’s Perfect
And that’s okay
wish I wasn’t so irritable at my kids
I and could be more like how they ask
of me.
The fulfillment is astounding; motherhood
is the purest state of living that I’ve
ever experienced— but loving them is
unconditional and it comes with many
challenges.
I can be patient and mindfully compassionate
to a point— but I can also regretfully
snap at my wits end.
I see a lot of posts going around about
early childhood trauma and how to
speak, act and do better for our children.
I agree that in an ideal world it’s true—
we should continually rephrase, nurture
and encourage *calmly* regardless of
any behaviour.
What I don’t agree with is this implied
accusation that we are damaging our
children if we don’t adhere consistently
to this standard of new-age parenting.
For abrupt frustration when we know
the older ones know better and it feels
like they’re testing us at a cellular level.
I think we should apologize to them
often, and after reflecting, manage those
big feelings with compassion as best we
can when they come up again
I won’t apologize though, for being a
human being in my evolution of parenting—it’s
a damn hard Olympic sport.
I think we need more real-life mothers
sharing how hard this is all actually is
with unapologetic solidarity and a side of
forgot-to-gentle-parent.
We need to agree that we all have different
levels of tolerance on different days
for the exact same behaviour.
We need to know that when we are being
tested, that it’s not a time to feel judgment,
instead a time to feel seen.
I think we must learn in hindsight and
discern teachings from our children; to
Changes with BC Medical Services Plan
premiums mean that families eligible for partial
payment of some medical services and access
to some income-based programs now must
apply for Supplementary Benefits through the
Government of BC. Applications can be done
online and take approximately 15 minutes.
Families who previously qualified for MSP
Premium Assistance should not need to re-apply
if taxes are completed yearly. It is advised to
confirm coverage before proceeding with
treatment to avoid paying out of pocket.
For more information, visit gov.bc.ca/gov/
content/health/health-drug-coverage/msp/
bc-residents/benefits/services-covered-bymsp/supplementary-benefits
I think all we can do is try and aim for
our best every day, but I refuse to feel
shame:
For my lack of patience when overstimulated.
For my cyclically-imbalanced mood
swings.
For utilizing screen time for sanity.
For the projection of my own childhood
wounds that I still need time to
heal.
look at challenges as an opportunity to
not repeat history, but also to see our
own instabilities as indicators to find
more support and seek self-care.
We must know that we don’t always
have to do everything right in order to be
a good mom. We are, and we need to put
ourselves first, too.
I hope this message helps normalize
any fear or sadness parents are going
through in transitions, especially when
other younger siblings are involved.
24 Island Parent Magazine IslandParent.ca