Haunting-Adeline

But then he breaks, his resolve sha ering, and finally—finally—he feasts
on my lips. Tas ng me like he's licking ice cream out of a cone.
My hands dive into his hair, exploring the so strands as his own bless
my body with the same honor, slipping beneath the duvet and roaming my
curves. His tongue ba les against mine, crea ng a tornado of passion and
a million pent-up emo ons.
The duvet feels heavy and suffoca ng on my body, but when I try to
wriggle loose, Zade traps me further. I yank away from him, and he follows,
making escape fu le when his lips are impossible to deny.
“Let me out,” I gasp between a nip of his teeth.
“We're not taking it past this, Addie,” he declares with finality.
“Why?” I breathe, and the logical part of me rallies against the stupid
ques on. I should be relieved.
“Because the first me I fuck you, I want you to have all of me. Not just
bits and pieces.” He takes a breath. “I’m not whole right now. And I can’t
worship you when all I see is her.”
Reaching up, I trace his scar, and a breath shudders out of him in
response.
“Okay,” I whisper. I get it. He’s suffering right now, and I’m only a
temporary distrac on. It doesn’t bother me when I know the girl occupying
his mind is a li le girl that is now dead. A death he blames himself for.
“I’m sorry, you’re right. But I just want you to know that it’s not your
fault. The what ifs will plague you as long as you let them, Zade. But you
need to remember all the girls that you did save. Don’t forget to remember
them, too.”
He doesn’t deign me a verbal answer. Instead, he leans in and skates his
lips across mine. I let him explore, our kiss much calmer. The burn is a low
sizzle, bubbling beneath the surface but depleted of oxygen to allow it to
grow.
Sex isn’t something either of us needs right now. He’s not in the right
mindset, and I don’t know if I ever will be. This thing with Zade—it’s
confusing.
And eventually, I’m going to have to put a stop to it.
Just not tonight.