Горизонт N9/838

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N09/838 от 03.04.2016 e-mail: info@gorizont.com Simply the best
your partner can certainly learn
from porn if you both enjoy
watching it, seeing sex acts enacted
can be very informing.
But porn and erotica are fantasies,
which means they are
probably leaving out some pretty
key safety factors that aren’t particularly
sexy but rather are practical,
real life necessities.
So, what are your options
when it comes to learning, on
your own schedule in a low pressure
way? I have the answer for
you.
PassionateU.com is a site
that’s been around for more than
a year, but with a new redesign is
even more useful than ever. With
over 600 videos and over 50 experts
the site offers 5–10 minute
videos that you can watch as
many times as you want (during
your membership). It features
topics from beginning to
advance on a wide range of topics.
It’s a form of sex education
that fits your life. It educates in
a straight-forward way that can
also be titillating and inspiring.
Invest in your sex life and you’ll
see the benefits right away.
KinkAcademy.com is another
site, very similar to PassionateU.com,
but focused on
the exotic world of BDSM and
fetishes. With over 1,000 videos
and 100 experts, there’s a lot to
explore! It takes the same unintimidating,
straight-forward approach
and shows how safe, fun
and wild sex can be, ya know,
if you’re into that sort of thing
*wink*
FiftyShadesRomance.com
is geared for those who fell in
love with the trilogy and want
to learn about the «kinky fuckery»
activities, but in a way that
goes deeper than the fantasy
expressed in the book. The trilogy
are great for fantasy (as its
current total of 60 million books
sold have proved) but they aren’t
how-to books. The site has light
kink and traditional sex acts, it’s
a very low-key start to your online
sex education. You don’t to
have even read the books to benefit
for the site
You know that that we were
not taught about the pleasure of
sex in school. Sex is WAY more
fun and it’s about time we all
started enjoying it more.
Full Transparency: I am the
founder of all three of these sites
and they are membership sites.
There is nothing else like them
on the web and I’d be recommending
them regardless of
whether I was involved or not.
It’s a revolutionary way to share
adult sexuality education, and
the sites have a lot of sexperts,
therapists, educators and doctors
that agree.
The bottom line is that if you
don’t have time, or if you think
you don’t have time to learn
some tricks to keep your sex life
smoking hot…you have options.
You do have time, and it is worth
it. You are worth it.
7 Things To NEVER Say To Someone Struggling With Infertility
Laura Lifshitz
Seriously. You’re not helping.
When someone experiences
or goes through infertility, or
pregnancy and infant loss, it’s
very hard to tolerate just about
anything someone might say.
For a long time it can feel as if
there are no correct words to
help your heart heal, but on occasion,
someone will say a gem
that really makes you feel a little
warmth and brightness during
such a stressful and dark time in
your life.
On the flip side, there are also
the people who say things that
you absolutely cannot believe
another human being would
Emily Blackwood
Sometimes the truth hurts.
I remember a long time ago, in
a galaxy far, far away, when house
parties were fun.
Though I was never a drinker,
I’d fake getting tipsy off my
bottle of water in hopes of an
epic get-the-boy-to-notice-youand-dance-the-night-away
kind
of evening. I don’t know why I
ever thought that was a possibility,
seeing as the only dancing
that occurred at these parties was
have the balls to say to someone
experiencing difficulty getting
pregnant, grieving over the loss
of a pregnancy or coping with a
stillbirth.
If you or your loved ones
are dealing with these heart
wrenching issues, hand all the
people you know and love this
list of what NOT to say someone
enduring fertility or pregnancy/infant
loss.
1. «You can always adopt.»
After I miscarried, an old
ex-friend of mine’s advice was
«Well there are plenty of babies
and kids looking for homes. You
can always adopt.»
While that statement is true,
number one, nowhere in that
statement does it acknowledge
the grief I experienced and
number two: news flash sister:
Not everyone can afford to
adopt. I know I couldn’t back
then and I still can’t! Throwing
those words around is foolish.
Adoption is a completely lovely
way to grow your family, but not
everyone is equipped to do so.
Please, bite your tongue people.
2. «Maybe it’s not your
time.»
Really? Really? Saying that to
someone struggling with infertility
is like a dagger in the heart.
Is there some schedule going
around in which people «sign
up» to have kids? Is Wednesday
not a convenient day for
someone with the first name
«May» to conceive? «Maybe it’s
not your time» doesn’t offer any
support for your friend or loved
one struggling with fertility issues.
Just save it please.
3. «God has another plan
for you.»
I understand this phrase
brings some comfort to select
people and there is absolutely
nothing wrong with someone
finding solace in spirituality and
religion, but to simply tell someone
«Oh hey guess what? Looks
like a baby isn’t in the plan for
you that G-d has scheduled.
You’ll have to get over this.»
4. «Well, you have one child
at least.»
For the parent who has a
child or two children and wants
to expand the family, that sentiment
doesn’t make matters better,
especially to someone who
just lost a pregnancy or experienced
a stillbirth. That baby or
that potential baby was a spirit
and being in his or her own
right. You can’t just substitute
one child for the other. Sorry,
not sorry.
5. «Kids aren’t all they’re
cracked up to be.»
Yes, children are hard work
but I am pretty sure that the
person enduring fertility issues
and/or grieving the loss of a
pregnancy wouldn’t mind the
hard work of a child.
6. «At least you can get
pregnant.»
Telling this to a woman who
miscarried or suffered infancy
loss won’t make her spirits any
brighter. At least you can – insert
any phrase of life…what
does it really do? At least you
can be quiet. Right now. Amen.
If You’re Not Losing Friends, You’re Not Growing Up
skanky hallway grinding.
Then one day, something
changed. My eyes opened, and I
finally saw the light. These parties
were lame and so were the
friends I was partying with. They
weren’t bad people, but their
ideas of a «fun night out» became
considerably different then mine.
Something shifted and hanging
out with them became more
exhausting than it was enjoyable.
And at first, I felt really alone.
Growing up, your group of
friends are your identity. Who
you hang out with is essentially
who you are. So it’s no wonder
letting go of some friendships
can really shake your sense of
self.
It might be hard, but it’s a necessary
part of getting older. These
friendships, especially the toxic
ones, can hold you back from
becoming the person you’re supposed
to be.
So no, you’re not an asshole for
never returning their calls. And
no, you’re not a loser because
you don’t have a crew. You’re just
growing up. Part of that is learning
how to be okay by yourself.
If you feel disconnected from
your friends, here are 6 signs it
might be time to move on:
You feel disconnected from
your conversations with them.
Do you find yourself zoning
out while they’re talking to you?
You’re probably not acting like
the world’s greatest listener because
you’ve stopped caring as
much.
It sounds harsh, but it just
means that their interests aren’t
the same as yours anymore, and
you both are better off finding
people you can actually connect
with.
You enjoy your alone time.
For awhile you may have felt
like you needed your friends
to be around, but now you’ve
got the confidence to just chill
by yourself without feeling like
you’re missing out.
Friends that don’t get the need
for alone time, and feel rejected
by it, are probably not the kind of
people you should keep around.
You stop caring what they
think.
No longer are you concerned
with their opinion of your new
job or your boyfriend. You’ve
even stopped going out of your
way to tell them about new things
in your life.
Growing up means becoming
comfortable with your own
identity, and that might result in
making some changes that your
former friends don’t understand.
You don’t include them in
your future.
Just like a boyfriend you’re
about to dump, you don’t think of
your former friends when you’re
thinking of an upcoming vacation
or moving to out of state.
7. «What happened?»
This is the sort of phrase that
shouldn’t be asked. It’s meant
out of genuine care but when
someone loses a baby, pregnancy
or simply can’t conceive, let
him or her give you the blow by
blow details when ready. Don’t
ask. Your friend or loved one
may not be ready to speak just
yet.
Knowing what to say to
someone in this situation isn’t
easy. Offering to listen, saying
you’re sorry, seeing how you
can help someone–perhaps
run errands or bring coffee
over, is the best way to help
someone enduring fertility issues
or saying goodbye to a
pregnancy.
Ask yourself if you see yourself
hanging out with the same
people a year from now. If the
answer is no, it’s time to move on.
You feel a little lost.
If you’re feeling like you don’t
know where you’re going in life,
it’s time to check your friendships.
Some people may be holding
you back from going in a certain
direction.
Even when you stop hanging
out with your former friends,
that feeling of being lost might
continue until you learn how to
be okay on your own.
You no longer identify with
who they think you are.
Toxic friends will want to
bring up the past and the things
you used to do. Good friends will
push you towards the future and
accept every version of yourself
you chose to be. They don’t limit
or label you.
Now isn’t that the kind of
friend you’d like to have?