Reading Body Language

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Part II: Starting at the Top
The unconscious tension in your lips indicates how you really feel, regardless
of what you say. You say you’re feeling fine? Then, why are your lips trembling?
You say you’re happy? Then why are your lips stretched across your
mouth like a razor’s edge? Whatever emotion you’re experiencing – anticipation,
pleasure, irritation – you’re lips are telling on you.
Tight lips
Tight lips indicate tension. Tense lips aren’t limited to negative emotions,
such as anger or annoyance. When you’re sexually aroused your lips become
tense, too. All the muscles are working in anticipation.
The moment Amanda was introduced to Simon she knew that he was the one
for her. Not wanting to give her hand away too quickly, she held back her feelings.
Amanda said that she always smiled when she saw Simon, and in order
to keep a big grin from covering her face, she had to tighten the muscles
around her mouth.
Tense and taut, the person with the tight lips is holding back some kind of emotion,
be it anger, annoyance, or sexual tension. Perhaps he’s pondering a problem,
perhaps he’s about to kiss you. Whatever the reason, tension is in the air.
Holding back your feelings
The phrase ‘keep a stiff upper lip’ is symbolic of
the British, and particularly of the young men
educated in the English public school system
during the time of the British Empire. ‘Do your
duty and show no emotion’ was the characteristic
attitude of that era, although the origins of
the phrase can be traced to America. Its first
printed reference can be found in the
Massachusetts Spy, June 1815:
‘I kept a stiff upper lip, and bought [a] license to
sell my goods.’
Although that illustration doesn’t explicitly refer
to holding back one’s feelings, it’s similar to
other 19th century American references and the
meaning is unmistakable. Here’s one example,
from the Huron Reflector, 1830:
‘I acknowledge I felt somehow queer about the
bows; but I kept a stiff upper lip, and when my
turn came, and the Commodore of the P’lice
axed [sic] me how I come to be in such company.
. .I felt a little better.’
In 1963 PG Woodhouse published a novel called
Stiff Upper Lip, Jeeves – a quintessential
English sentiment.
In more recent times British heroes have been
permitted to demonstrate their emotions in the
public arena. Footballers can occasionally be
seen crying when they lose, while their fans
share and support them in their grief. Before
World War II that kind of behaviour would have
been an anathema.