Anthony Robbins AWAKEN THE GIANT... - Lemma Coaching

And the list went on. Finally I asked for her "should" rules. She said, "I should exercise more." And
that was it!
Now, this woman has an overweight friend. When I asked her what she must never do in order to be
healthy, she gazed 153 at me with a blank stare 154 . She had no "must never" rules in the area of health!
She did have a couple of must rules, however: she must eat, and she must sleep. Then I asked if she
had any "should" rules. "Sure," she said, "I should eat better; I should exercise. I should take better
care of my body." She also had a list of "should not" rules such as, "I should not eat meat, I should
not overeat," and so on. This woman had plenty of things she knew she should do, but because she
had very few "must" rules, she never got into the position of giving herself intense pain for doing
unhealthy things.
And it wasn't difficult to realize why she had never been able to keep the weight off. If you've ever
procrastinated on anything, were you perhaps using some "should" rules such as, "I should start this
project" or "I should begin an exercise program"? What would have happened instead if you had
decided, "I must start this project" or "I must start this exercise program," and then followed through
by conditioning it into your nervous system?
Remember, we all need some structure. Some people have no clear rules for when they're successful.
Rules can provide the contextual environment for us to create added value. Rules can motivate us to
follow through; they can cause us to grow and expand. Your goal is simply to create a balance
between your "must" rules and your "should" rules and to utilize both types of rules in the appropriate
context.
RULES REALIGNMENT
Right now, begin to take control of your rules by writing down your answers to the following questions.
Make your answers as thorough as possible.
1. What does it take for you to feel successful?
2. What does it take for you to feel loved—by your kids, by your spouse, by your parents, and by
whoever else is important to you?
3. What does it take for you to feel confident?
4. What does it take for you to feel you are excellent in any area of your life?
Now look at these rules and ask yourself, "Are they appropriate? Have I made it really hard to feel
good and easy to feel bad?" Do you have 129 things that must happen before you feel loved? Does it
take only one or two things to make you feel rejected?
If that's true, change your criteria and come up with rules that empower you. What do your rules need
to be in order for you to be happy and successful in this endeavor? Here's a critical distinction: design
153 gaze 1. (starrer) Blick; !! nicht Gaze; 2. starren; gaze at starren auf (Akkusativ), anstarren
154 stare 1. starren; stare at jemanden anstarren; 2. (starrer) Blick, Starren