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<strong>in</strong> a house full of strangers."<br />
Another career woman recalled how liberated she felt<br />
when she decided to forego a fish d<strong>in</strong>ner with others<br />
attend<strong>in</strong>g a meet<strong>in</strong>g <strong>in</strong> San Francisco. Instead, she took herself<br />
to a Greek restaurant on a Saturday night and had a<br />
wonderful time on her own.<br />
Privately, as the number of people liv<strong>in</strong>g alone has mushroomed,<br />
attitudes have changed. Fifty years ago, Garbo<br />
renounced Hollywood and shocked the world with her<br />
desire for solitude. Today,<br />
almost everyone has an aunt,<br />
uncle, sibl<strong>in</strong>g, or parent who<br />
lives alone, lessen<strong>in</strong>g the<br />
believability of stories about<br />
weird loners.<br />
"<strong>The</strong>re are a million k<strong>in</strong>d<br />
of places you can go as a s<strong>in</strong>gle<br />
person," <strong>in</strong>sists Helen<br />
We<strong>in</strong>garten. In larger cities,<br />
the choice is even more<br />
readily accepted, although<br />
some women have compla<strong>in</strong>ed<br />
about the problems<br />
of social events associated<br />
with work. <strong>On</strong>e woman<br />
age<br />
15 to 24<br />
25 to 34<br />
35 to 44<br />
45 to 54<br />
55 to 64<br />
65 to 74<br />
75 and over 52 20<br />
Source<br />
who hates to ask male<br />
friends to be her escort<br />
reported that when she shows up alone at such functions, "I<br />
have been the absolutely only s<strong>in</strong>gle person there."<br />
All Is Not Rosy<br />
Even though many of these middle-aged s<strong>in</strong>gles live alone<br />
by choice, there are problems. Almost everyone mentions the<br />
annoyance of everyone assum<strong>in</strong>g that they are part of a pair.<br />
As one woman who lives <strong>in</strong> a town without public transportation<br />
po<strong>in</strong>ted out, even tak<strong>in</strong>g her car <strong>in</strong> for repairs can<br />
be a hassle. It's assumed there is a partner to provide transportation<br />
until the car is ready. And, she wondered, how can<br />
one person hang a curta<strong>in</strong> rod across a six-foot w<strong>in</strong>dow<br />
<strong>On</strong>e person does not live half as cheaply as two. Real<br />
estate taxes are the same no matter how many people live <strong>in</strong><br />
a house. So are ma<strong>in</strong>tenance costs. And car repair bills. <strong>On</strong>e<br />
person may use a bit less electricity or gas than two, but a<br />
woman on her own may have to hire help to do chores and<br />
make repairs. Of the 7.6 million s<strong>in</strong>gle homeowners 65 and<br />
over, six million (79%) are women.<br />
Jeff Mortimer cites disadvantages s<strong>in</strong>gles face <strong>in</strong> taxes,<br />
<strong>in</strong>surance, and even gett<strong>in</strong>g a loan. He also remembered los<strong>in</strong>g<br />
a job to a married man who was much less qualified for<br />
the position than he was.<br />
Vacation plann<strong>in</strong>g is often mentioned by s<strong>in</strong>gles as evidence<br />
of their <strong>in</strong>visibility. <strong>On</strong>e woman decided aga<strong>in</strong>st a<br />
cruise when she learned how much more it would cost for a<br />
s<strong>in</strong>gle cab<strong>in</strong>. Hotels also charge more for one person. And<br />
most packages assume travelers are part of a pair. In larger<br />
cities, the demand has produced some travel agencies that<br />
specialize <strong>in</strong> trips for people on their own.<br />
F<strong>in</strong>ancial Shock at Retirement<br />
Women who have worked all their lives often have their<br />
own pension, social security, and IRAs. But they have<br />
earned their share <strong>in</strong> an economy that paid women less than<br />
PERSONS LIVING ALONE<br />
BY ACE AND SEX: 1993, 197O<br />
(PERCENT OF TOTAL POPULATION)<br />
1993 197O<br />
women men women imen<br />
3 4 1 2<br />
7 11<br />
6 10<br />
11<br />
18 10<br />
32 13<br />
70 cents for every dollar a man made. Retirement plans for<br />
couples may <strong>in</strong>clude two pensions and two government<br />
checks, but the retired s<strong>in</strong>gle makes do with one of each,<br />
often calculated on a lower base pay. <strong>The</strong> Older Women's<br />
League's study shows that m<strong>in</strong>ority women are even more<br />
likely than whites to be alone and poor as they age.<br />
A study by <strong>The</strong> Employee Benefit Research Institute <strong>in</strong><br />
1993 had even more alarm<strong>in</strong>g predictions for women on<br />
their own. Three-fourths of the elderly poor are women.<br />
Half of the women over 65<br />
'1970 is shown for the population 14 years and older.<br />
US Census Bureau. "Marital Status and Liv<strong>in</strong>g Arrangements: March 1993."<br />
3<br />
3<br />
7<br />
17<br />
32<br />
37<br />
4<br />
4<br />
5<br />
7<br />
11<br />
19<br />
are widows. (<strong>On</strong>e happy reason<br />
for more older women:<br />
Accord<strong>in</strong>g to several studies,<br />
men who live alone die at an<br />
earlier age than those liv<strong>in</strong>g<br />
with a wife or caregiver, but<br />
women who live alone survive<br />
longer than their connubial<br />
sisters.)<br />
S<strong>in</strong>gle mothers and displaced<br />
homemakers (women<br />
whose primary occupation<br />
had been car<strong>in</strong>g for a family<br />
and who failed to f<strong>in</strong>d fulltime<br />
employment after a<br />
divorce or death), are four<br />
times more likely to be liv<strong>in</strong>g<br />
below the poverty l<strong>in</strong>e dur<strong>in</strong>g their work<strong>in</strong>g years. <strong>The</strong>re<br />
have been no published studies of how childless s<strong>in</strong>gles do <strong>in</strong><br />
the general economy.<br />
Many s<strong>in</strong>gles are aware of the problematic future and are<br />
consider<strong>in</strong>g some k<strong>in</strong>d of communal arrangement with<br />
friends. In Ann Arbor, Michigan a group of s<strong>in</strong>gle women<br />
are th<strong>in</strong>k<strong>in</strong>g about build<strong>in</strong>g a house together—each person<br />
would have a separate apartment, with a shared communal<br />
liv<strong>in</strong>g room and kitchen. In Wash<strong>in</strong>gton, D.C., a group of<br />
friends are talk<strong>in</strong>g about buy<strong>in</strong>g themselves a retirement<br />
home <strong>in</strong> Costa Rica. In New York City, a group of s<strong>in</strong>gle<br />
women writers discuss buy<strong>in</strong>g a weekly newspaper <strong>in</strong> New<br />
England.<br />
Still, those are <strong>in</strong>dividual solutions to a national problem.<br />
As more and more s<strong>in</strong>gles move <strong>in</strong>to retirement and the possibility<br />
of serious illness, the country will have to take notice<br />
of them. Perhaps they will beg<strong>in</strong> fund<strong>in</strong>g their own politicalaction<br />
committees and send lobbyists to Congress. Or the<br />
s<strong>in</strong>gle members of Congress will establish a S<strong>in</strong>gles Caucus.<br />
At the very least, there should be a concerted effort to get<br />
the national plann<strong>in</strong>g for health <strong>in</strong>surance, retirement, home<br />
care, and other problems to reflect more directly the reality<br />
of the American population. Not everyone has live-<strong>in</strong> caregivers.<br />
Not everyone can expect family members to be available<br />
for long-term home nurs<strong>in</strong>g. Not everyone spends their<br />
f<strong>in</strong>al years <strong>in</strong> the warm embrace of a long marriage and lov<strong>in</strong>g<br />
family. Not everyone has relatives nearby for holiday visits<br />
or even basic shopp<strong>in</strong>g. Millions of people will be rely<strong>in</strong>g<br />
on "the k<strong>in</strong>dness of strangers" dur<strong>in</strong>g the years when they<br />
are least able to fend for themselves. •<br />
Journalist Bryna Taubman first explored the subject of the s<strong>in</strong>gles<br />
population <strong>in</strong> a series for the New York Post <strong>in</strong> 1969. She is coauthor<br />
of How to Fall <strong>in</strong> Love and Land on Your Feet, due out<br />
<strong>in</strong> Spr<strong>in</strong>g by St. Mart<strong>in</strong>'s Press.<br />
ON THE ISSUES WINTER 1995<br />
33