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in a house full of strangers."
Another career woman recalled how liberated she felt
when she decided to forego a fish dinner with others
attending a meeting in San Francisco. Instead, she took herself
to a Greek restaurant on a Saturday night and had a
wonderful time on her own.
Privately, as the number of people living alone has mushroomed,
attitudes have changed. Fifty years ago, Garbo
renounced Hollywood and shocked the world with her
desire for solitude. Today,
almost everyone has an aunt,
uncle, sibling, or parent who
lives alone, lessening the
believability of stories about
weird loners.
"There are a million kind
of places you can go as a single
person," insists Helen
Weingarten. In larger cities,
the choice is even more
readily accepted, although
some women have complained
about the problems
of social events associated
with work. One woman
age
15 to 24
25 to 34
35 to 44
45 to 54
55 to 64
65 to 74
75 and over 52 20
Source
who hates to ask male
friends to be her escort
reported that when she shows up alone at such functions, "I
have been the absolutely only single person there."
All Is Not Rosy
Even though many of these middle-aged singles live alone
by choice, there are problems. Almost everyone mentions the
annoyance of everyone assuming that they are part of a pair.
As one woman who lives in a town without public transportation
pointed out, even taking her car in for repairs can
be a hassle. It's assumed there is a partner to provide transportation
until the car is ready. And, she wondered, how can
one person hang a curtain rod across a six-foot window
One person does not live half as cheaply as two. Real
estate taxes are the same no matter how many people live in
a house. So are maintenance costs. And car repair bills. One
person may use a bit less electricity or gas than two, but a
woman on her own may have to hire help to do chores and
make repairs. Of the 7.6 million single homeowners 65 and
over, six million (79%) are women.
Jeff Mortimer cites disadvantages singles face in taxes,
insurance, and even getting a loan. He also remembered losing
a job to a married man who was much less qualified for
the position than he was.
Vacation planning is often mentioned by singles as evidence
of their invisibility. One woman decided against a
cruise when she learned how much more it would cost for a
single cabin. Hotels also charge more for one person. And
most packages assume travelers are part of a pair. In larger
cities, the demand has produced some travel agencies that
specialize in trips for people on their own.
Financial Shock at Retirement
Women who have worked all their lives often have their
own pension, social security, and IRAs. But they have
earned their share in an economy that paid women less than
PERSONS LIVING ALONE
BY ACE AND SEX: 1993, 197O
(PERCENT OF TOTAL POPULATION)
1993 197O
women men women imen
3 4 1 2
7 11
6 10
11
18 10
32 13
70 cents for every dollar a man made. Retirement plans for
couples may include two pensions and two government
checks, but the retired single makes do with one of each,
often calculated on a lower base pay. The Older Women's
League's study shows that minority women are even more
likely than whites to be alone and poor as they age.
A study by The Employee Benefit Research Institute in
1993 had even more alarming predictions for women on
their own. Three-fourths of the elderly poor are women.
Half of the women over 65
'1970 is shown for the population 14 years and older.
US Census Bureau. "Marital Status and Living Arrangements: March 1993."
3
3
7
17
32
37
4
4
5
7
11
19
are widows. (One happy reason
for more older women:
According to several studies,
men who live alone die at an
earlier age than those living
with a wife or caregiver, but
women who live alone survive
longer than their connubial
sisters.)
Single mothers and displaced
homemakers (women
whose primary occupation
had been caring for a family
and who failed to find fulltime
employment after a
divorce or death), are four
times more likely to be living
below the poverty line during their working years. There
have been no published studies of how childless singles do in
the general economy.
Many singles are aware of the problematic future and are
considering some kind of communal arrangement with
friends. In Ann Arbor, Michigan a group of single women
are thinking about building a house together—each person
would have a separate apartment, with a shared communal
living room and kitchen. In Washington, D.C., a group of
friends are talking about buying themselves a retirement
home in Costa Rica. In New York City, a group of single
women writers discuss buying a weekly newspaper in New
England.
Still, those are individual solutions to a national problem.
As more and more singles move into retirement and the possibility
of serious illness, the country will have to take notice
of them. Perhaps they will begin funding their own politicalaction
committees and send lobbyists to Congress. Or the
single members of Congress will establish a Singles Caucus.
At the very least, there should be a concerted effort to get
the national planning for health insurance, retirement, home
care, and other problems to reflect more directly the reality
of the American population. Not everyone has live-in caregivers.
Not everyone can expect family members to be available
for long-term home nursing. Not everyone spends their
final years in the warm embrace of a long marriage and loving
family. Not everyone has relatives nearby for holiday visits
or even basic shopping. Millions of people will be relying
on "the kindness of strangers" during the years when they
are least able to fend for themselves. •
Journalist Bryna Taubman first explored the subject of the singles
population in a series for the New York Post in 1969. She is coauthor
of How to Fall in Love and Land on Your Feet, due out
in Spring by St. Martin's Press.
ON THE ISSUES WINTER 1995
33