Reflections - cover2

Thoughts on being a Lady
"If", by Rudyard Kipling, from which the preceding line is taken, is considered a poem for boys by many, and a sexist travesty by feminists. But,
to her everlasting credit, Mother insisted that Man and Son in this context referred to humanity, not just to one sex. Ah, my first stirrings of
liberation! In all honesty, I must admit that my first ideas on what being a lady was all about came from this poem. To my feminist friends, I
ask that they reread the poem and delete the last line.
“Always act as if you’ve seen bigger and better, gone further, and stayed longer.” In other words, don’t be overly impressed with obvious
displays of wealth or importance. Ostentation was considered very déclassé.
“Never discuss how much something cost or what you do or don’t have. Never ask anyone where they bought something or tell them where you
bought yours.” Again, déclassé.
“Always treat everyone the same.” Rich man, poor man, beggar man, thief. It was required that I refrain from either kissing ass or looking
down the considerable length of my nose at anyone, anytime, period. Noblesse oblige.
“Always take up for the underdog.” Ditto paragraph above.
“Kill them with kindness” and/or “Give them the silent treatment.” This admonition came into play when I had been wronged, snubbed,
insulted, or otherwise mistreated. And was usually followed with, “Give them enough rope and they’ll hang themselves.” Ah! Vengeance
cloaked in kindness – what a weapon!
Other out-takes on developing one’s ladyship follow without such excessive explanation:
“If you act like a lady, you’ll be treated like a lady.”
“Don’t take things too personally.”
“She has a ‘pardon-me-for-living’ attitude.”
“Get hold of yourself.”
“Keep a stiff upper lip.”
“That was no better than expected.”
“Don’t be afraid to be different.”
“Carry on.”
I almost forgot: “You are often judged by your grammar and table manners.”
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