It Starts with Us by Colleen Hoover

“Did Tim do that to you?”
I clench my arm and nod. “Yeah, but it was a long time ago. How he treats
a son might be completely different from how he treated a stepson.”
“That shouldn’t matter, right? If he treated you like that, why should he
get another chance with me?”
It’s the first time Josh has come close to admitting his father isn’t a hero.
I don’t want to be the person he blames in the future for not having a
relationship with his dad, but I want to tell him he’s right. His father
shouldn’t get another chance. He left and never looked back. There’s no
excuse good enough to walk away from your son.
There’s this toxic belief that family should stick together simply because
they’re family. But the best thing I ever did for myself was walk away from
them. It scares me to think of where I might be had I not done that. It scares
me to think of where Josh might end up if he doesn’t do that.
Josh looks past me, toward the house. His eyes grow a little wider,
prompting me to turn and look.
Tim is outside, making his way from the front door to his truck. Josh and I
watch in mutually stunned silence.
He looks fragile—older and smaller. Or maybe that’s because I’m no
longer a kid.
He’s swigging from the last of a beer can when he opens the front door to
his truck. He tosses the empty can into the bed and then leans inside his cab
in search of something.
“I don’t know what to do,” Josh whispers. He seems all of the twelve
years old that he is right now. It kind of breaks my heart to see him so
nervous. Josh’s eyes are pleading for truth when he looks back at me, like he
needs me to guide him in this moment.
I’ve never said a bad word about Tim to Josh, but knowing I’m not being
completely honest with him about my feelings feels like I’m doing a
disservice to him as a brother. Maybe my silence on the matter is more
damaging than my truth would be.
I sigh and set my phone down, giving this moment my full attention. Not
that it didn’t have my full attention before, but I was trying to give Josh
space. It doesn’t seem like he wants it, though. He wants brutal honesty, and
what else is an older brother good for if not for that?
“I don’t know my dad,” I admit. “I know his name, but that’s about it.
Sutton said he left when I was young, probably about the same age you were