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JON KRAUSE
pleasure and life affirmation. Every table is a
stage that must be transformed.
Running a restaurant is like running an
army, with motivation and human behavior
as tools of the trade. My battalions come in
brigades called sous chefs, chefs de cuisine,
garde margers, sauciers, poissioniers, rotisseurs,
patissiers and stewards. Deployment
decisions are made according to troop
strengths and skill levels. Being a sociologist
and historian is imperative, as numerous
creeds, cultures, nationalities and religions
impose their traditions on my actions.
The culinary arts also provide a good home
for a chemist, with understandings of organic
and inorganic reactions; for a biologist, with
respect for anatomy and diversity; and for a
physicist, experienced in the practical applications
of mechanics and thermodynamics.
Certification in nutrition—normal, childhood,
geriatric—and disease is required. Familiarity
with emergency medical procedures associated
with burns, lacerations, fractures, strains,
and a whole host of maladies is a necessity.
Rigorous sanitation knowledge and discipline
must be acquired and followed. The health and
well being of hundreds of people are at stake
every day. Forget the hundreds of people; it is
your health and welfare that are at stake.
So will the surgery fix a fat guy’s biggest
problem? My surgeon is not an obtuse academic;
he really had a profound insight. He
says the surgeon’s blade can help fix only one
thing,“the results” of my metabolism. It can
adjust, to within normal limits, a part that
genetics has played in my life of obesity. It
can prevent my body from holding and storing
excess amounts of consumable energy.
That’s all.
Oh, would that were enough … but it isn’t.
The rest of the problem—the behavioral,
environmental, educational and emotional
part—still remains.
It has taken years to learn that the love,
concern and skill I have with food is also an
overwhelming obsession to use food as a
mood-altering substance. The pleasant
phrases I used to describe my passion for
The concern for
serving people and
enhancing welfare
help me avoid
getting close to
anyone. If making
and serving food
is the point, I don’t
have to make
conversation, be
polite, navigate a
social scene, or be
open with anyone.
food can be an attractive mask for an addict
who hoards and guards his obsession. The
concern for serving people and enhancing
welfare help me avoid getting close to anyone,
by shifting the focus to food. If making
and serving food is the point, I don’t have to
make conversation, be polite, navigate a social
scene, or be open with anyone.
All my chef’s knowledge was pursued in
the service of an underlying feeling of inadequacy.
If I could just know more and be a
better chef, then I wouldn’t feel quite so insufficient.
My knowledge conspires to place
me in the center of the universe, above the
rest. The reality is that every thought that
crosses the mind is not worthy of note. Most
thoughts that cross the mind need to cross
and just keep moving out.
It has taken years to understand what is a
normal portion of food, and the part food
plays in a food-adjusted person’s life. The
phrase “this dessert is too rich for me” has
never been comprehensible, and to this day
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