Hey Nostradamus! By Douglas Coupland

"Why did he say, 'Oh, I say'?"
"Because he needed to have a cheesy tag line every time he appeared on our stage, so to speak." It felt
uncomfortable, if not obscene, discussing the characters with an outsider. Especially with Reg, who as a
child probably spent his Sundays scanning the dot patterns in the weekend funnies with a magnifying glass
in search of hidden messages from the devil.
I told Reg about Froggles, too. "Reg, my point is that these were characters shared solely between
Jason and me. Nobody on the planet could possibly have known about them."
Reg was silent. This drove me nuts. "Reg, say something, at least."
He poured the tea. "I guess what's strange for me here is to learn that Jason had an inner world that
included all these characters and all the things they said."
"Well, he did."
"And that he spoke with them all the time."
"He didn't speak with them, he was them. Or rather, they were us. We both have our own personalities,
but when we went into character mode we became something altogether different. You could give me a
thousand bucks and I couldn't think up a single line for them to say. Jason, too. But me and Jason
together? There'd be no stopping us."
"Do you have any wine?"
"White or red?"
"White."
I took the bottle out of the fridge and poured it for him. He said, "Ahhh, God bless vitamin W."
I asked him if the psychic aspect of these events upset him for religious reasons.
"Psychics? Lord, no. They're all quacks. I don't believe God speaks to humans through them. So if a
psychic's sending you messages, either the psychic's faking it, or something ungodly is coming through."
"Yeah, well . . ."
"Look, Heather, I know you're upset that I don't believe in your psychic."
"She gave me evidence, Reg - "
He raised his hands as if to say, Nothing I can do about it.
Meanwhile I had to make dinner. I had no idea what was in the fridge to eat - fat-free yogurt? Limp
celery? I got up to inspect. I had this thought: "Reg, is all this supposed to make us better people? I
mean, is that why we're going through this - so that our souls can somehow improve?" I found a plastic
tub of frozen spaghetti sauce.
"Maybe."
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