An Apres Morris Song Archive - The Morris Ring

Bold Sir John (Ronnie Barker)
Bold Sir John was young and fair and Bold Sir John
was gay
He said I’ll tread the morning dew to take the air and
listen to… the twittering of the birds all day ,
the bumblebees at play
The twit , the twit, the twit, the twitThe twittering of
the birds all day.
The bum, the bum, the bum, the bum
The bumblebees at play.
Bold Sir John went on his way observing natives
farce
Dear Mother Earth oh tell me pray why elephants
live so long they say
Your flies live but a day, then they drop dead upon
the grass.
Your flies, your flies, your flies, your flies
Your flies live but a day then they
Drop dead, drop dead, drop dead, drop dead
Drop dead upon the grass.
Now Bold Sir John he met a maid as on her back
she lay
Please show respect and come not near for I’ve
seen many a maiden here get lost among the new
mown hay,
So doff your hat I pray!
Get lost, get lost, get lost, get lost
Get lost among the new mown hay
So doff, so doff, so doff, so doff
So doff your hat I pray!
When Bold Sir John returned home they gave him
gin to try
Nay fill me up with liquor not, nor give me grain or
grape to sup
Pour cowslips dew into my cup a Puritan am I…
Pour cow, pour cow, pour cow, pour cow
Pour cowslips dew into my cup
A pur, a pur, a pur, a pur
Up you, up you, up you, up you, a Puritan am I.
Boomerang! (Les Barker. ad. ed. tune: Jingle Bells)
Boomerang, boomerang I throw this thing away
This is what I try to do every single day. X2
1) I`ve had this bent old stick
Since I don`t know wnhe
Tried to throw the thing away
But it just comes back again
It really gets me down I know I should not let it
But the thing that drives me crazy is
HOW DID FIRST GET IT?
2) One day while out the front
I chucked it ran indoors
Then I heard this voice that hollered
IS THIS BOOMERANG YOURS?
I threw it for my dog we used to call him Jack
But every time we threw it up
It brought the dog straight back
Boozing (trad.)
Now is the lot of a poor single man?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
And what is he doing whenever he can?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
You may think I’m wrong and you may think I’m
right,
I’m not going to argue, I know you can fight,
But what do you think we are doing tonight?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
ch: Boozing, boozing, just you and I
Boozing, boozing, when we are dry.
Some do it openly, some on the sly
But we all are bloody well boozing.
And what does the Salvation Army run down?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
And what are they banning in every town?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
The stand on street corners, they holler and shout,
They shout about things they know naff all about.
But what are they doing when its time for lights out?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
And what are the joys of a poor married man?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
What is he doing whenever he can?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
He comes home at night and he gives his wife all
He goes out a-shopping, makes many a call
But what brings him home hanging on to a wall?
Boozing, bloody well boozing!
3) Once I saw a shop with a boomerang on display
Tried to tell the shopkeeper I`d brought it yesterday
You can exchange this stick,
You shouldn`t get the sack
He said this thing is different
For they`ll always be this come back.
4) At last it flipped my head
i strapped some semtex to
The middle of the boomerang
Without thinking things through.
Ok what happened next I really should have known,
The blessed boomerang survived
But not our lovely home.
5) So this Christmas time think ahead please do
If you think a boomerang is just the thing for you.
I always have this phrase and so does my dear wife
`t`s just like when you have a pet
A BOOMERANGS FOR LIFE!
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